Hi @Eden1717 ,
It sounds like you have a pretty clear understanding of where you stand now with your support team and what your options are but aren’t sure about what you want to do moving forward. I can’t imagine how difficult and confusing it would be to have solid and consistent idea of what you believe and how you want to approach things when you feel pulled in so many directions. Especially when ideas, thoughts or delusions that are larger than life, can allow us to escape our lives, these can be very highly motivating. As with any disorder, depression, anxiety, even trauma. It can be easier to believe what we feel or what’s inside of us, than trust someone else’s perspective, especially if we feel it’s hard to trust others.
I can imagine it could feel like a maze sometimes, trying to work out where to go or finding a firm path through, only for it to go in directions we aren’t expecting.
