hey everyone, I just felt like talking about what's going on for me! I posted on here a while ago about whether to switch psychologists, which I ended up doing, and the psychologist I have now is just - the best! I really feel listened to, and I get lots of sparks of understanding and inspiration during our conversations, and we always have some laughs together as well 😊 Recently she gave me some questionnaires to fill out for different neurodivergences, and I thought to myself, "I have filled these out just like any other person, I'm totally average, nothing is going to show up on these tests." But it turned out I tested highly for ADHD. I am actually excited about it!! It's so amazing that this could be an explanation for so many of the things I struggle with, because that means that I'm not lazy or stupid, life isn't just super hard because that's just how it has to be, the world isn't super intense and fast and painful because that's just how it is... there's a reason for why it feels that way. I always felt like "anxiety/depression symptoms" wasn't the whole story for me, and I felt guilty for still feeling like I was suffering even when those symptoms had improved. I thought I was imagining things. even if it isn't ADHD, I am going to a psychiatrist (I also posted about that a long time ago because really I always wanted to go but I thought I was just being excessive and I should stop making a big deal out of my minor issues) and get their insights and hopefully find out more pieces to the story. I always felt neurodivergent but I never brought it up to psychologists, I thought if I really was neurodivergent they would bring it up, so if I bring it up, I'm just "trying to be different and special." But my psychologist agrees that I am neurodivergent and has been exploring it with me and that makes me so happy. I just feel like I'm at a really cool point in my journey right now and I've been wanting to talk about it so badly! Thanks guys 🙂
