Thanks so much @November13 @Anzelmo @Taylor-RO 💙💙💙
It is hard to know if the way you're experiencing life is the 'normal' way because whatever it feels like to you, that's your 'normal.' But life is very hard for me, so it's a relief to think that my 'normal' isn't really normal. @Taylor-RO that's so true, people tell us we could do better if we tried harder and we see other people doing what we're 'supposed' to be doing, so we think we must have some moral failing. I try so so hard every minute of the day to cope and manage and do better. Sometimes I just break down crying because I am tired of trying so hard. I have a very chaotic mind and I am constantly forgetting things the moment they're out of my sight e.g. I see my packed lunch and think I should put it in my bag, so I open my bag and then I have to spend a minute trying to remember why I opened it. At work and in social situations, every second I'm trying to figure out what people expect of me and give it to them while still being present enough to actually listen to people and do things, but all my instincts want me to go into some safe quiet corner and tune out reality. Just always fighting!! I don't want to be swimming against a current my whole life... I'm so hopeful that me and my psych, and the new psychiatrist, will be able to work something out.
