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You’re absolutely right everyone has their on way of grieving. In fact, I think that making the conscious choice of acceptance and visceral understanding about death is your way of grieving. That appreciation you have is such an amazing quality to have as a human being because not everyone can do that. Sometimes I struggle with it as well. Do you have any actions you take consciously to practice appreciation? I’d love to know even just for myself. 
I hope you’re doing okay and it’s great to see you back on the forum again 💜