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Hey @Alexandra_ 
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing with us how you've been feeling. It sounds like you feel quite burdened by these thoughts and I'm so sorry you feel so isolated. Did you feel comfortable sharing some of the thoughts you have? If not, I completely understand. A strategy I use when I'm finding it difficult to actually talk to someone is journalling. I'm not sure if you've already tried this but it can help to have our thoughts written on paper. It acts as a way to physically distance ourselves from heavy thoughts. ReachOut has a great app called WorryTime which interrupts this repetitive thinking by setting aside your worries until later, so you don't get caught up in them and can get on with your day. This means you can deal with worries once a day, rather than carrying them around with you 24/7. You can decide on a time, place and length of time to deal with your worries each day. Or, use it to review your worries and get rid of the ones that no longer matter. 
I know you're feeling alone and hope that you know that you can count on this community's support 💜
Take care, Alex.