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Hi guys

Thanks so much to everyone who responded giving me support and ideas on how to approach this @Love_and_Light @Lindas @Pho-RO @Blake_RO @Pete-RO @Stormy-RO 

it was excrutiatingly hard to reach out to my boss about this, but I did it. Her response was so supportive and understanding, it made me cry. Like you said @Love_and_Light it made the pressure at work so much less now that my boss was aware of my difficulties. something else also surprised me. I think for neurodiverse people we have trouble reading between the lines and grasping unspoken expectations. this confusion caused me a lot of stress and was part of the reason I felt I had to be 'perfect' all the time and avoid showing any weakness, so that I wouldn't accidentally violate whatever people's expectations are. when my boss wrote back to me she was specific about what things are my responsibility and what aren't, that she doesn't want me to worry about XYZ, what she actually thinks about my performance, and stuff like that. I recommend ND people to ask their boss to do this kind of straightforward communication with them. I felt so much calmer when things were laid out for me like that and I didn't have to do any guessing.