I've been lonely for ages. Only now have I realised living isolated isn't the best way of living but I'm clunky around people. Thing is I didn't want to be around people in my teens, but in my mid 20s I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. It's got to a point where I wanted to ditch my previous job to be a postman. The title is a mix of feedback from my former employer & my psychiatrist. I've been described "like a woman" where others have to read between the lines, whatever that means, and also described as looking Russian...yeah really. I'm not overly emotional unless it's extre me, I'm hardly vocal, and I find myself running into imaginary brick walls when I'm talking to someone. I can't express myself - even when things are OK - and I don't have anything to say most of the time. And small talk...eugh.   I'm pretty anxious socially since I have troubles connecting with anyone - I've always wanted to know what it's like in a serious relationship, romantic or not - or interviewing. I'm slightly paranoid in certain situations that I'm off-putting in the rare times I've actually gone out (alone), and at work I'm mostly avoidant.   The worst feeling I would get was Friday after work, believe it or not - It's where the loneliness & anxiety hit hardest. Ideally I'd like to be at the very least more charasmatic, so is there any advice? ... View more