Thanks for feeling as though you could talk to me about this @Bananatime04, I know that discussing your sexuality can be very personal and difficult, especially when you aren't 100% sure.    In terms of what to do and how to tell for sure, my biggest piece of advice would be to take some time to just sit with the idea of being bisexual on your own. When I realised I was a lesbian, I felt quite daunted and unsure and strange too, but the more I explored what this might mean on my own, the better and more confident I felt that this was my identity. In terms of 'exploring' my identity, I tended to watch videos on Youtube with same-sex couples, and read stories about same-sex relationships as this was something I really enjoyed. Other times, I would spend time imagining myself with girls that I liked from school and what a relationship with them would look like. During this time, I tried not to interrogate what my feelings meant too much, I just did what made me happy and went from there. Eventually, I was able to group these positive feelings towards women together and classify them as 'attraction', but that took some time. I would highly recommend that you don't put too much pressure on yourself to find a label that suits you immediately - when you know, you'll know.    With regard to telling people, and particularly your parents, my advice would be to do this in your own time when you feel comfortable with who you are. While my experience may not be the same as yours, I found it helpful to take some to sit with my sexuality before telling some people. This gave me the space to love who I was before I had to battle with other people's opinions of whether it was right or wrong. I think this was potentially the most useful thing that I did in the process of coming out - I initially tried to come out very early, before I had personally accepted that I was a lesbian and was comfortable with that identity. I'm glad that I didn't tell too many people, because the few years that came after this gave me the chance to grow, build confidence, and learn to like myself for who I was. In terms of discussing your sexuality with your parents, this is a tricky one. I personally have a very strong relationship with my parents and I knew that they didn't have a problem with homosexuality, so I was very lucky. However, I recognise that not everyone is this fortunate, and even if they are, coming out is still a scary experience. Do you feel as though you could discuss this with your parents? If not, is there someone else you trust that you feel comfortable discussing it with?    When it comes to coping with people's opinions of being same-sex attracted, there will always be people that support you, people that don't, and people that surprise you. No matter how anyone in your life responds to the idea of you being bisexual, there is a whole community of people out here who love and accept you for who you are, no matter who that may be. With regard to RO, this is a LGBTQIA+ friendly space, so you can always feel welcome here.    Overall, my advice is this: take your time, and enjoy the experience of learning who you are. There is nothing to be embarrassed about when it comes to exploring your sexuality - this is an incredibly normal experience. Be kind to yourself during this process, and try not to judge your feelings, impulses or thoughts, because whatever happens and whatever comes up, you are worthy of love and belonging.Thanks again for reaching out, and if there's anything else you'd like to ask, please don't hesitate to reach out xx ... View more

Absolutely! What did you want to ask?  ... View more

Original Sin - INXS  ... View more

Thanks @Eden1717, those tips were really helpful. I am sorry that you can empathise with this situation, but thank you so much for the advice xx ... View more

Hey @Bananatime04! How are you? I'm sorry I haven't logged on in a while, but I thought of you today. I hope things are going well for you, and if they aren't too great, I hope we can talk about it together. I've missed you!  ... View more

I am looking forward to taking my girlfriend home for Christmas. She has met my family already and they all love her, but it will be great to walk through my hometown as an openly gay person and feel proud and comfortable with who I am, maybe for the very first time really.  ... View more

Hi @Bananatime04, thanks for checking in! The new house is going really well. It took some work getting all of our furniture in, and then it took some getting used to living without my parents, but things are good!     ... View more

Hi @Maryhadalittlelamb, I don't think we have spoken before on RO, but I just read through your thread and I think there is a chance we have a lot in common. I can empathise with the feeling of putting other people's needs before my own to the extent that it becomes draining - I find it really hard to put myself first too. I'm sorry that your experience with your counsellor left you feeling numb and sad, it can be disheartening to reach out for help and still feel down.   I don't know what you're going through exactly, and I won't say I know what it feels like, because everyone's experience is different, but here are a few words based on my own experience. I know what it feels like to wake up in the throws of a rough patch that seems to have lasted in a long time, and it is really hard. But I also know that life is comprised of rough patches and smooth patches, ups and downs. This gives me hope when I'm in a dark place, because I know that this feeling, while painful and disheartening, is only temporary. I make a concerted effort to think of the times when I have felt differently, when things haven't felt so hard, because I know that life can be like that again. Maybe not today, and maybe not tomorrow, but eventually, it won't feel so hard.    I also know that reaching out for help and talking to others is one of the most difficult, but important, things you can do, so you should be very proud of yourself for reaching out for help and support. Connection with others can be difficult, especially when you feel like your friends are toxic and negative. Are there any people in your life right now that you trust that you feel you can lean on for support?   I hope you know that I, and the whole RO community, are behind you, every step of the way. You sound like such a giver, which is a beautiful an generous thing, so I hope that we can repay you for your kindness and support you too. Thinking of you x ... View more

1. I had breakfast outside with my Mum, which is really nice because we will only be living in the same city for 2 more weeks 2. I had a lovely baked dinner with my family  3. I get to have an early night to lay in bed and watch movies  ... View more

Thanks @letitgo and @Bananatime04, I'm feeling a lot better! I'm starting to pack up my stuff tomorrow, and I get the keys next weekend so I'm feeling good. I have talked to my sister about expectations and who is going to do what, so we are going to get a whiteboard planner so we know each other's schedules and see how we go! I'm sure it will be a trial and error experience.  ... View more

Thank you all for the really helpful tips!    @dog_lover94 I do get along quite well with my sister, we are best friends so I am sure that we will be able to help each other out when it comes to loneliness.    @hellofriend @WheresMySquishy Thank you for all of the advice, I'll be sure to give all those things a try! ... View more

I had a really productive study day I did some cleaning, which made me feel more organised and helped my parents My cat and I are having a snuggle on my bed ... View more

  Have you seen a psychologist before? If so, do you have any advice to those who are seeing a psychologist for the first time?   I have seen multiple psychologists on multiple occasions, and my biggest piece of advice would be to be totally honest. A psychologist is an objective third party, so they don't (or shouldn't have) judgments on you and the people in your life. It's not like talking to a parent or friend, where you having to worry about how they will react to what you say or the things you're thinking (particularly if it is quite distressing). I find that my best psychology sessions are the ones where I say the things that I am thinking and wouldn't say to anyone else, because this gives my psychologist a deeper understanding of what is going on in my mind. Your psychologist is only as good as the information you give them. My grandmother always says that they are psychologists, not psychics, so they can't read your mind. If there is something bothering you, telling them straight up is often the key to feeling better, because they can't give you coping strategies for problems they can't see or don't know about.   With that being said, I completely understand that it is hard to be honest with a complete stranger, and that trust is an essential part of honesty. Seeing a new psychologist for the first time can be really daunting! But, every time I've gone into a new practitioner and spilled my guts, I've felt so much better because their response is never shock and horror - it is most often empathetic and solutions-focused, which is the whole purpose of psychological treatment. Be brave and lean into the discomfort - if you're comfortable, you're not growing.  ... View more

Today I practiced self-care by spending some time alone in my room to regroup after having a lot of social activities over the past few days . Us introverts need to recharge!  ... View more

Hi @lokifish, thanks for getting this thread up and running again!    I just went and bought some new books yesterday. I am part-way through Mindset by Carol Dweck, which is about transitioning from a fixed and stagnant mindset to a growth mindset, but I'm feeling a little bogged down by all the seriousness of it. So, I grabbed some fiction to get me back in the reading mood. I'm starting with the Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood - I love dystopian fiction like We and 1984 but I've never read this classic! I also have a copy of If All the Cats Disappeared from the World by  Genki Kawamura. It is a Japanese book translated into English, and it follows a protagonist who makes a deal with the devil in order to extend his life after learning he has cancer. For every additional day that the main character receives, he has to choose something to eliminate from the world - it will be as though it never existed. It's very interesting, and really shows what we take for granted.   What about everyone else?  ... View more

 I just want to say a big thank you to everyone who has shared or read this thread. I think some really powerful stories have been shared here, and if that makes life easier for even one person, then I think that's amazing. Sending all my love and support to everyone xx   ... View more