Girl I Want
Everyone has different needs in in their partners. Some want beauty, some want status, some just want their attention. Some want their partner to understand their every side without saying a word. To be honest, I don't know actually what type of person I am looking for. I have been into a lot of relationship and none of them went well. Caring, understanding or beauty rather then all these things I want someone ambitious. Someone who is totally goal driven. But a thought comes to my mind all that if the person is goal driven how will I become the priority in her life. I also want someone to lean their shoulder to put my head and sleep peacefully after all the struggle. So the question I ask myself in what do i want?
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Hi medoriyya
Goal driven girl here!
I thought maybe I could offer some perspective others here haven’t yet.
My own intense goal setting and desire to achieve success is a habit fuelled by poor social experiences. I’ve always struggled with friends, and had a lot of school bullies, so being better academically was the one thing I could always lord above my bullies, and thus led me to work as hard as I do.
It’s this combined experience of needing success and having had bad friendships that I know makes me a fighter for the most important relationships in my life. Because having and maintaining great relationships is a goal of mine. So sure, whilst we might cancel a date to get that major assignment finished, we’ll also always make up for it, because we value our relationships. We value our relationships because they provide a safe harbour when we set ourselves up to fail, so you’ll be one of the things a goal-driven girl needs most in her life.
Also, you know she’ll always support you in your own ambitions, because she wants the same from you.
Hope this offers you some clarity!
Hi @medoriyaa
Sorry to hear that your past relationships haven’t worked out. It can be really hard to figure out exactly what you are looking for, but it sounds like you already have some important qualities in mind—someone who is goal-driven and someone who makes you feel safe and at peace. Those are both really meaningful things to want in a partner, so it is great that you have that as a starting point.
It might also help to reflect on your past relationships and think about what you liked and what didn’t work for you. Writing it down could give you more clarity on what truly matters to you in a partner. But at the same time, I think it is also okay to take the pressure off figuring it all out right away. We are always growing and changing, and sometimes what we need in a partner shifts over time too.
From personal experience, what matters most is that your relationships feel mutual, respectful, and that they make you feel seen and heard.
@starhlights  That's a great idea to seat and reflect on my past relationship. It won't just help me figuring out what I want, but also it'll help me realise even more precisely what things I did wrong on those moment. Thank you .
Hi there @medoriyaa 
It can be hard to figure out what we want in a partner sometimes. I'm sorry to hear that you haven't had much luck with your relationships in the past. It's great that you can identify that you want someone that's goal-driven, but I understand you have concerns about how much of a priority you would be in that person's life. I'm wondering if it could be possible for a goal-driven person, who might also have other ambitious goals, to also be goal-driven and dedicated to a relationship as well?
I'm also wondering if you'd be able to look at your own values and/or personality as any indication of what you might want in a partner? For example, I am someone who is always punctual and organised so I might want my partner to be punctual and organised much the same.
Let me know what you think?
Best wishes 💜
I always wonder about exactly what you said. Yes, you are right I am an ambitious person myslelf, I think that's the reason I am attracted more to them who are ambitious. Now come to think of this even more precisely maybe I want someone who could be my inspiration, someone who will able to keep up with me, someone whom I will be able to look up to. I want that kind of person but in the long run will that be a right choice for me ?
Hey @medoriyaa I totally understand where you are coming from. It can be super difficult to really know what you're looking for in a partner. I'm sorry to hear that your past relationships didn't go well. I would say though just because things didn't work out in the past, doesn't mean that future relationships won't succeed. I think every relationship is completely unique. It sounds like you do know a few things that you want in a partner which is awesome! In regards to someone being super ambitious, I think there is also room for balance. People can be ambitious, but also caring, and still prioritise their relationships. My advice would be to be kind to yourself, not many people know exactly what they're looking for and everyone is unique in their own way! Hopefully the right person comes along for you 🙂
Thanks for understanding @Louis5163. The thing you said about every relationship is uniqe, that is totaly true. I have learned this after intaracting with so many people and knowing them. Maybe even hearing stories of my friends.
About finding the kind of person I want I wonder if people like these even exist or not.
