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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:42 PM
@stonepixie @safari93 Maybe it's a case of multiple criss-crossing lines rather than one straight continuum? But then you get those who aren't on the continuum at all. Damn I don't know how to visualise it either 😛
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:38 PM
Ah @Chessca_H I'd almost forgotten about that. I think it came from ace people still being in relationships and saying that romance isn't the same as sexual-ce. And it grew from people differentiating romantic feelings from sexual feelings. A lot of people think it's a lie and i have seen this, "an excuse for ace people to be 'in love'" or something like that.Personally, I am aromantic too and I think it's important for people to understand the difference between sexual feelings and romantic feelings and understand that they aren't the same.
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:34 PM
We all seem really switched on about LGBT issues here! But while we've focused on the community itself, how do we get ally support?
This stuff can be complicated enough when you’re experiencing it yourself, but for many straight, cisgender people even learning about the basics can be new and overwhelming. What do you feel is the most important thing for people who want to be allies to the LGBT+ community to know?
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:38 PM
This stuff can be complicated enough when you’re experiencing it yourself, but for many straight, cisgender people even learning about the basics can be new and overwhelming. What do you feel is the most important thing for people who want to be allies to the LGBT+ community to know?
I don't know if I can really answer this as a straight person - it's probably more for those who're LGBT+ themselves. I'd say really listening to and validating the experiences of those in the community is important though, and with that comes a need to be open minded.
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:48 PM
It is important for allies to know that they can't define what a person is, only the individual can. Someones identity is a very personal thing and when you try to tell someone that they can't be 'x' because they do things that aren't stereotypical of that identity or it is a lesser known identity, it can be quite hurtful.Never assume someone identifies as something when they could have an identity that covers a range of things.
My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:34 PM
TV shows are getting better with this and I love that.cartoons are too because children are not too young to learn about this. If you force (whether or purpose or by accident) a gender on your child, they should be able to learn that there are other options and they don't have to be apart of that.- Mark as New
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:31 PM
@safari93 I second you on the ace spectrum. Not just because I identify there, but also because I am VERY sexually repulsed and... I hate the highly sexualness in things. I get that some people like that but there just isn't much there to help stop me from seeing it.- Mark as New
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:28 PM
Unless you seek out information on all of the different sexual orientations, romantic orientation, and expressions of gender identities that exist yourself, it’s easy to miss the lesser-known identities that often go unacknowledged and don’t receive the respect they deserve. What are some that you know that could use some more visibility and what can we do to help that happen?Asexuality, which is really a spectrum too with demisexual and greysexual. I think pansexuality needs more too. All I ever really hear is gay, lesbian and bi or bi/pan. Rather thsn gay, lesbian, bi, pan and ace.
With gender, I think the labels need to be guidelines, not strict labels. Like, girl, kinda-girl, meh, kinda-boy, boy, both and nope. You can be whereever you want to along that line or not even there because it's YOUR gender. You csn tell people what you want to be called and anything past that is your choice. Don't think you have to fit into any one label, because you don't.
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:34 PM
The asexual spectrum and pansexual. The amount of times I have to explain what these are, isn't funny. But then doesn't bi have this kind of thing where people accept that you are bi when single, but when they are dating someone, they automatically become straight or gay/lesbian? I have been reading that bi people struggle with this.But then sexuality also depends on how the view the spectrum as well. Is it point a or b or is it a line that people exist somewhere on?
Same can be said for gender.
My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:40 PM
@stonepixie it seems like people kind of just try and normalise any identity, so if you identify as Bi but are in relationship with someone who identifies as the opposite sex, people make a heteronormative assumption (they just assume you're straight). So the less visibility there is around your identity, the more assumptions are made...I think?
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:38 PM
@stonepixie That issue is definitely there with being bisexual and dating. I've had a lot of people assume that I had magically turned straight when I was in a relationship with a guy. Not fun stuff -_-
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:42 PM
This stuff can be complicated enough when you’re experiencing it yourself, but for many straight, cisgender people even learning about the basics can be new and overwhelming. What do you feel is the most important thing for people who want to be allies to the LGBT+ community to know?
- LISTEN! LGBT+ people have experiences that most straight, cisgender people aren't even aware exist. Assuming that something doesn't happen because you don't personally experience it is a no go.
- When discussion of LGBT+ issues comes up, try to amplify the voices of LGBT+ people, rather than speaking on their behalf
- Call out people you know who say anti-LGBT+ stuff, that's one of the most important roles you can play
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:32 PM
One thing I very rarely here discussion about is romantic orientations, especially those that are on the aromantic spectrum. I've only started learning about it quite recently and don't ever here it discussed really even in specially LGBT+ spaces.
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:27 PM
Unless you seek out information on all of the different sexual orientations, romantic orientation, and expressions of gender identities that exist yourself, it’s easy to miss the lesser-known identities that often go unacknowledged and don’t receive the respect they deserve. What are some that you know that could use some more visibility and what can we do to help that happen?
I think the ace spectrum in general is often ignored, especially since LGBT events can be advertised as overtly sexual and ~adult~ events. I also think trans identities are only really shown if they really strongly conform to traditional masculinity or femininity - despite the fact that being trans doesn't mean embodying one end of the gender binary all the time, and that being nonbinary is a thing.
As for ways, I think the internet in general has really helped to bring a diversity of LGBT experience to everyone. It isn't always the same as media representation, but at least now we can make some noise to see that kind of change happen. Also I'm very very excited by how willing children's media is to show gender nonconformity (mostly Steven Universe, but I'm not a child so I know v little about children's shows otherwise lol)
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:31 PM
@safari93 That's a good point about the ace spectrum! Also I'm glad you brought up children's media. Shout out to Play School who've led the way in normalising LGBT families from early on. Seriously, is there anything they don't do right? 😛
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:22 PM
@lokifish @safari93 I haven't really thought about how boys feel about wearing pants/shorts and they should be given the chance to wear skirts WITHOUT judgement. Because it sucks that girls can wear either but boys aren't, by societies standards.I just want gendered uniforms to go away. I really do. I understand that female and male bodies are different. But mens shirts are SOOO much more comfortable. Schools woyld be better with two shirt types, skirts, pants/shorts and/or dresses. No gendered uniforms, make them go away.
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:17 PM
Having supportive people around you who respect you sexuality and gender is a big part of boosting your mental health. Who plays that role in your life?Well... Anyone that I've told about my asexuality or gender ambiguoisness is respectful. I don't get, as in recieve, boosted mental health but not because of them but because I'm uncomfortable asking for that kind of help.
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:22 PM
It looks like a lot of you have a good support base going 🙂
On to the next Q!
Unless you seek out information on all of the different sexual orientations, romantic orientation, and expressions of gender identities that exist yourself, it’s easy to miss the lesser-known identities that often go unacknowledged and don’t receive the respect they deserve. What are some that you know that could use some more visibility and what can we do to help that happen?
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:26 PM
Unless you seek out information on all of the different sexual orientations, romantic orientation, and expressions of gender identities that exist yourself, it’s easy to miss the lesser-known identities that often go unacknowledged and don’t receive the respect they deserve. What are some that you know that could use some more visibility and what can we do to help that happen?
I really don't know many of the lesser-known identities so I'll be interested to learn about some from others! In terms of visibility it's all about media representation and while it may not be realistic to go through every identity in sex-ed classes, directing young people to decent online resources on the topic would be a great thing. Do we have a factsheet about this on RO?
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:21 PM
Did anyone read about a couple of guys from a British school? Can't remember where I read the article but anyway, they got into trouble for wearing shorts on a hot day and sent home to change into regulation uniform (trousers) so they came back in skirts.My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:23 PM
I haven't heard that story @stonepixie but those guys sound like absolute badasses that I totally wanna befriend! Good on them 😛
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:17 PM
@N1ghtW1ng 100% in support of this rant! Our school had slacks for girls but the boys could only wear pants, which barely goes anywhere in providing for LGBT kids. In year 12 our graduating class actually decided to swap uniforms for the day (with the awful name of 'crossdress day') but the backlash from the school administration was so intense and we were all like ???? Why?? It's just clothes???
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:19 PM
@safari93 The swapping uniforms thing at the end of year 12 is a pretty common occurrence in schools in my area. I think it's absolutely ridiculous that they'd have an issue with it for even one day - considering all the outright stupid/unsafe things kids have historically done on muck up day, a guy wearing a dress to school is hardly an issue
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:14 PM
Hey @stonepixie!!!
Having supportive people around you who respect you sexuality and gender is a big part of boosting your mental health. Who plays that role in your life?
My friends and some family members! Not all of them are super keen on my sexuality, but the family who do (and friends of course) are all very accepting and were actually way less problematic than I thought they would be
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originally posted on 25-07-2016 9:14 PM
Hahaha @lokifish I wish.Quick uniform rant. Girl and boy uniforms are the worst part of gender segregation in schools. They force people to wear the clothes of their birth sex and that is not right. For multiple reasons. Not just because of trans and queer but also those who aren't comfortable in these clothes. Girls that only have skirts or dresses for an option is horrible for girls who prefer pants and hate skirts, like I did until I decided I wasn't a girl. The double standards too is not right. Vague example of my school, ties. Girls get tiny ties for all year round while boys get longer ties for winter only.
IT IS NOT RIGHT!!!!!! Rant over, sorry.
