Dealing with health anxiety

[Beautifullybroken]

@mspaceK hope all the tests go okay. Sometimes tests can be quite uncomfortable, but I do hope they figure out what is going on and can treat it soon. It's good you have your bf to support you. Is he going to go to the ultrasound with you too?

Take care of yourself. Hope you feel better soon. Sleep or watching tv sounds good. Since you have the next few days off, try to focus on yourself, you can get through this. We are here for you <3.

[Tiny_leaf]

@mspaceK ultrasounds are weird.. it sucks that you have to do an invasive one, but hopefully it'll give you some answers.

It's good that your doctor's taking everything seriously, but so many tests can be really draining...

[mspaceK]

Yes! He will come with me I hope @Beautifullybroken . We're going to organise it so that he can. And thank you @Tiny_leaf . 

I've just been sleeping all afternoon. Feeling pretty drained. I just want to disappear I'm safe though. 

[Tiny_leaf]

@mspaceK did you want to talk about anything? 

[mspaceK]

@Tiny_leaf The GP I saw today was so lovely. I'm really happy I had her. She was open about her thoughts and talked me through what my other tests would be like to reassure me. I'm really upset aswell though because I did not get to see the nurse lady who I was expecting to see. The truth is is that I don't feel like I'm coping. I just want to cry all the time and I don't feel like doing anything. and now all this health stuff has just been thrown on top and I feel like I am drowning. :'( I'm seeing my psych tomorrow. Not sure if he will help but I'll try to tell him. 

I'm so fucking sad and lonely :'( 

[Tiny_leaf]

@mspaceK she sounds really nice.

And that sucks... I'm not surprised that you're feeling overwhelmed with all this stuff to deal with...

I really hope he can help...

Have you thought any more about going to a hospital at all?

[mspaceK]

@Tiny_leaf I keep just trying to get through each day.  

I don't know about the hospital. Maybe my psych will talk to me about it. But I have to tell him about my feelings. It's so hard face to face. 

I feel so depressed  

[Tiny_leaf]

@mspaceK yeah.... I couldn't tell my psychologist at first, even though she's really nice. My friend ended up having to do it because she was getting really worried for me. 

If you have any scars/ marks from sh maybe you could show him..? Even if you can't find the words, he should at least understand that it means you're struggling and need extra support. 

Are you planning anything good in the rest of today at all?

[mspaceK]

@Tiny_leaf yeah - maybe I could show him. I have a friend who I could possibly talk to and maybe my boyfriend too. I don't feel like my family can help, especially not my housemate or dad. They just wouldn't understand. When I've brought this stuff up before they made me feel so much more lonely and worse. 

I don't really know what my options are and I'm running out of money because I haven't been working. It's really exhausting focusing all my energy on being healthy and safe. Does that make sense? 

I'm about to heat up some food and then go back to bed. I might watch netflix this time. 

[Tiny_leaf]

@mspaceK yeah, that all makes sense, and it sounds so difficult... 

Have you tried the Sane website? I'm terrible with financial stuff but someone there might be able to help you find some extra options. 

I know what you mean about family not being helpful.. I'd suggest going to your friend and boyfriend for support more than them, if you haven't already...