Lost
Lately I have been feeling nothing but heartache, sadness and anger. At times it hit's me for no reason and at times it's because people don't notice I'm struggling and it's hard to say a single word without being told I'm going to be fine when really I have never been fine. I'm afraid to let myself be happy because it can never last long enough for me to enjoy, so instead I let myself hurt. I don't the accept the feeling of happiness anymore, I have completely lost interest in everything and everyone. I can never leave my room without feeling like I'm worthless.
Can anyone give me any helpful advice?
Comments
Hi @Nesianluv . What you're going through seems really tough. Has anything happened recently that might have prompted these feelings, or do you feel like you've felt this way for a while?
I really empathise with you about being scared to feel happy. I remember so many times when I've recognised that a spark of happiness bloomed inside me, and I immediately shoved it down because I was so scared that the feeling wouldn't last. For me, it was also partly because I believed I didn't deserve to feel happy, which was so damaging and detrimental to myself.
It took a long time for me to accept that I am someone who deserves to feel happy. I can understand how you might be feeling worthless and alone, especially since you say that the people around you don't notice your struggles, and these feelings definitely don't make it any easier. @mspaceK had a great tip about trying to practice self care, directing compassion at yourself. Is there anything you like to do that helps you relax and rewind?
One thought that has sometimes helped me about self worth is to think, "would I say these sort of things about the people who I love?". If not, I took it as a sign that I was being harsh on myself.
Hope this helped you feel maybe a little less alone, and always know that everyone here is more than happy to listen and try help! 
hi @skyedre thank you!! I have been feeling like this for a while my days have been really hard. Thanks for understanding. The only thing that seems to help me relax is music and going for walks. I guess I may be hard on myself because I think I don't deserve a lot of things.
Hey @Nesianluv. Here is a link for a music thread that I created.
I hope it helps, I know that it should help some people. Including me.
I sing too! What's you're favourite song to sing?
@xXLexi_Lou122Xx thank you so much!!! and my favourite song to sing is MIDNIGHT BLUES by UMI you should give it a listen
Hey @Nesianluv
How are you feeling today?
We all feel lost at times, I know I struggle with it.
As @mspaceK said self-care is great and it doesn't have to be a big thing, it can be as simple as going for a walk or treating yourself to your favourite sweet treat.
I love going to a café and people watching, I make up stories about the people in my head and where they are going and what their lives are like.
I've also started going to the gym which has been great for my mental health as it gets the serotonin pumping and also makes me feel productive too.
You should not be afraid of being happy, happiness can be fleeting at times but that's what makes it special and you can hold onto those moments and then remind yourself of them during the tough times.
Last year at the end of each day I would write down something I was grateful for and then stuck the slip of paper in an envelope. It could be anything big or small and it reminded me even on bad days that I had something to be grateful for. Maybe this could be something you could try?
Hey @ErinsAntics
I am feeling OK a little bit frustrated but for no reason at all. That's nice to know what helps you I may try it sometime. It is very hard for me to feel happy but I am trying so hard.
Hey @Nesianluv
It's good that you are feeling ok, and it's ok to feel frustrated at times. Sometimes life can be annoying and let's be honest we don't need a reason for how we are feeling at times.
It's great that you are trying to feel happy but it can be hard to feel happy at times, so sometimes its good to aim for feeling ok or content. You might not be happy about something but you might be fine about it which better than feeling upset or sad about it.
Just keep working towards feeling happy and know that we are here to help 🙂
Sent from my iPhone
@Nesianluv hey! It's really good that you have tried reaching out to people you know. The response of "you'll be fine" can be really brutal. I'm sorry that has happened. And I think sometimes it comes from a place where the person may not know how to respond to the way you are feeling and says it to try and give you courage. I cannot speak for the person who said this to you, but it might be worth thinking or asking the question - is this person saying this to you because they are unsure of what to say? Or they know you better and know that you are strong and can pull through. I know that isn't really helpful in the moment when you're trying to reach out though. What do you think about this perspective? And what would you like this person to say or give you?
Taking time away from school can be a good thing! I have had to defer studies and skip out on uni classes in order to help manage my own mental health, and I do it with my work job too. Do you feel like the time away from school is helping you?
It's definitely difficult to reach out to people especially when we struggle with communicating. I'm sorry that has been so tough for you. You are doing amazing reaching out here though 🙂
Hi @mspaceK
Thank you!!!!!! and it's ok i hear it a lot of times almost every week it kinda pains me. I am not so sure why I would get a response like that but it may be because that person does not really know what to say and thats fine but at the same time I wish it was something more and taking time away from school has helped and not helped at the same time.
@Nesianluv Yeah, I see.
I am not really sure what to say tonight as I can't imagine how tough this is for you. I think taking steps to reach out about it is great though. In what ways has not going to school helped do you think?
Hey, do you like music too? You're avatar picture is a piano. I play Violin, that's why I have a violin as my picture!
Hey @xXLexi_Lou122Xx its nice to know someone understands and yeah I am in love with music I actually sing!!
Hey @Nesianluv . I think you are very brave for reaching out and telling people about this. That takes courage! I wondered, are you in school or uni or anything like that?
I am sorry you are feeling so down at the moment. Those are strong emotions and it really sounds like you want to talk to people or someone about it, even if they would just ask you how you are? Am I getting that right? Thank you for sharing this.
Has there been anyone that you have told about this or someone you feel like you want to tell? Opening up can be really hard. I'm actually struggling with this myself as I just started seeing a new psychologist.
I think my tip would be to practice self-care. Do you know or use any self-care strategies?
I am always here if you need ❤️
And I know Kids Helpline is really great too. I hope this helps.
