working/things to do in uni holidays
I wasn't really sure which space to post this in, so hopefully this one is okay.
I am currently in my uni holidays and feel a bit restless/bored. I know I should be working, but I am finding it hard to gather the energy to look and apply for jobs. I was planning on not working this holidays - but I feel like a loser not working and not really doing anything.
The past few years everything has seemed really boring, and I guess I was hoping this holidays I could not work and instead do some fun things. The problem is now I feel like I am being super lazy and am falling behind my peers.
I don't know if I should try and get a job, try to join some hobby clubs/groups, or do both. A part of me wants to work to fill in time, but another part of me doesn't want a holiday job.
Comments
Hi @Jardin I'm hoping you're feeling well.
I know that the holidays can be overwhelming in terms of not knowing what to do and just wanting to stay home and laze around. It's been especially hard with everyone going in and out of lockdown and quarantine.
To maybe help you make a decision I think that it's perfectly realistic to do both - work a job and have free time for hobbies and friends. But I think what's most important in your position is that you just act. Whether it's to find a job or find a hobby/go out, the best thing for you to do is just do it even if you aren't sure. That way you will find out if that is something you enjoy or not and you can move on and push through with more decisions and actions.
Dear @Jardin 
I think a lot of people can relate to that sense of feeling bad or not good enough if they aren't being 'productive' enough or 'achieving' enough. We get ourselves into trouble when we start comparing ourselves to our friends and the people around us. As humans, we have a tendency to compare 'up' as well; i.e., we have the tendency to look for people who are 'better' than us at certain things. So, it's not unusual that you are doing it, but it definitely can make us unhappy. I totally agree with @lemurien and I like their garden/nature analogy. We all have our own path and do things at our own pace, and that is totally okay.
On the other hand, it can be beneficial for us to put ourselves out there and challenge ourselves. I guess the question is - what is stopping you from doing these things? Sometimes when people feel really sad and down, they lose energy, and can't be bothered doing things, and in such cases, these people can benefit from pushing themselves and getting themselves out there. Additionally, sometimes when people worry a lot about trying new things, they will avoid it because they are scared, but we know that avoidance is unhelpful for worry/fear, and one way to overcome fear is to actually do what you are afraid of.
What do you think after reading this reply? Is there anything I've here that has rang true (or very untrue) for you?
Hey @Jardin I think we are a lot alike. I totally understand that restless feeling when you don't have much to do and then the guilty urge to fill it with something 'productive' like work, feeling like you're doing something wrong because you may not be doing the same things your peers are. I wanna say though, it really is okay for us to live life at our own pace, rather than trying to rush and keep up with our peers. when I feel bad about it, I try to remind myself that nothing in nature rushes and everything blooms in its own time - btw, your username and profile pic always make me think of a bunny in a garden, peacefully hopping about in the sunshine 🌼
As for me, some of my uni holidays I worked, some I didn't, and tbh I never really made that much money haha and I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be doing anything different right now, if I had worked more back then. (That being said though, doing a job we like can give us a sense of purpose and enjoyment, so if you're interested in working definitely go ahead and pursue it! But don't force yourself.)
being bored does suck though! Are there any particular hobbies or groups you're thinking of joining? I'd love to hear about them 😊
Hey @lemurien thanks for your lovely reply!
I'd like to join a jogging group or a cycling group in particular, though I would be open to other things like language learning and pilates.
I relate so much to feeling the guilty urge to doing productive work! - I feel like this pretty much every holiday. What you said about taking your own time is really helpful and the nature analogy is a great way to remember it.
