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This is a super tough situation to be in. Thanks for your honesty and vulnerabilty in sharing.

I think this is where we can link back to the fears in not starting the conversation about boundaries due to feeling uncomfortable or scared of what the reaction might be or how it will impact our relationships - unfortunately alot of the time we can't control how someone is going to behave or react to us and this leads to us wanting to avoid it all together. 

If doing anything to make others happy is not making YOU happy - then we want to re-adjust that. YOU should be included in the energy you spend to make others happy - give some of that love and joy back to yourself