Hi @M03
It can be really difficult to deal with the conflict between our hearts and our mind. It's not your fault for feeling the way you are. As you said, it's part of the human condition and we don't always choose who we grow fond of. However, if you feel like it's not the right time for you and it's not the right place for your feelings to be directed - you could always try and focus that emotion and energy into yourself and try to grow as an individual. This worked for me in the past when I have felt emotionally overwhelmed and confused.
From my personal experience self-love, care, and growth goes so far and can really affect how we feel about ourselves and other people. It's a long process but such a fulfilling one that it serves as a really good distraction and you can also find out more about yourself in the process. This includes exercising, finding new hobbies or interests, developing a passion, reading books, or practicing existing skills that you enjoy.
But at the end of the day how emotions work with every person is a little different. I hope you find a way through this in whichever way you see fit. And as @Taylor-RO has suggested, how would you feel about discussing this with someone from outside of your school where there wouldn't be pressure for judgment?
