Mardi Gras is such a joyful time of year for me. I love celebrating my identity as a lesbian, my wonderful relationship with my partner, and being part of a community that looks out for each other, and I think that allies are such an important part of that celebration.
I have a number of wonderful allies in my life, but my sister stands out as a shining example.
She's been incredibly supportive of who I am and who I love since I came out around 7 years ago, but more recently she's become a lot more active in the LGBTQIA+ community. I think what makes her a great ally is that she takes the time to educate herself on queer issues rather than expecting me to do all the heavy lifting. She often sends me links to LGBTQIA+ events that she'd like to go to with me, and she doesn't treat events like the Mardi Gras parade as just another opportunity to dress up and go out. Instead, she uses them as a chance to learn about the history of what queer people have gone through in this country, and often asks me if we can go to talks and forums about LGBTQIA+ art, culture and history so that she can better understand what it must be like to be me.
One of my favourite new developments in her journey as an ally is that she has worked out that queer culture is slightly different for gay men and women. She's binge watching all of the TV shows and web series that I watched as a closeted teen lesbian (like Carmilla and the L Word), and seeing her put in that kind of effort to try and understand what was important to me when I was grappling with my sexuality alone makes me feel so loved, supported, and most of all, seen.❤️🧡💛💚💙💙💜
My advice to allies would be to step up and step back - ask questions, do some research, watch shows, get involved, but also get curious and create a space to listen to your queer friends and what is important to them. At the heart of it, gay, bi, pan, trans, intersex and queer people are just that - people - so what we need from you is going to be as individual and unique as us!
