Aw @fishyie this is such a relatable experience 😔 I'm so sorry you're feeling alone.
You sound like a great friend who has a lot of time for the people you care about - and there's nothing wrong with wanting friends who do the same. I know you're not alone when you talk about the weird feeling of needing to speak to people vs not reaching out. It would be nice to see the community jump in a share their own experiences with this!
There are many reasons why a friend may not be responding, but it still hurts and can leave you questioning things. I'm curious, has this been happening for a long time?
I know you're worried about how your friends will react if you bring this up with them (which is totally understandable), but I thought I'd share some articles with you that might help if you ever decide to bring things up - sometimes, having awkward conversations can actually strengthen your friendships, and at the very least help, you move forward/know where you stand.
How to tell your friend they've hurt you and 4 steps for coping with changing friendships have some good points that may relate to your situation.
I'm glad you got this off your chest. We're always here to hear you out 😌
