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Hi @Samm, welcome to the ReachOut forums, it’s really great to have you here 🙂 Thank you for sharing a little bit about what has been going on for you recently. It sounds like you have been dealing with a lot lately, and I can hear what an exhausting and stressful time it has been for you. How are you feeling today? 

It sounds like changing medications has been a really tough journey for you. I am sorry to hear you’ve been experiencing side effects from the medication, it sounds like an awful thing to be going through. Changing up medication is not always an easy process, it can be really upsetting to feel as though nothing is working. It can often take time to find the right fit for you. Though you mentioned that you have consulted with your GP on this, I was wondering whether you have considered consulting with a psychiatrist who specialises in anxiety and depression?

I am really sorry to hear that you lost your father when you were 9, it is really painful losing someone as important as your parent. Have you come across a service called Feel the Magic? I thought I would share it with you, as they have resources and programs for young people experiencing grief. 

You mentioned that since your father passed you have been struggling with fears of not being alive or getting a terminal illness. I can understand how the side effects from the medication would have been really triggering your anxiety around this. It's an awful feeling to have when you can’t shake the thought of something terrible happening, it can really get you worked up and worried about things. You mentioned that your anxiety has cooled down now, but I am wondering if your GP is aware of the impact that the medication had on your anxiety? 

I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in fearing things like death, illness or surgeries. To many, if not all, these are really scary events to consider. Have you found any strategies that help to distract yourself from these thoughts when they are present? This article has some tips on how to manage anxiety, and this one has self-help tips for depression, if you’re interested in having a read.

I thought it also might be helpful to share that ReachOut has a one-on-one peer chat service, which connects you with peer workers who have experienced mental health challenges themselves. If this is something you might be interested in, you can find some more info on it here

It takes a lot of courage to share your story, so thank you for reaching out today. The team at RO are here. 

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