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Anzelmo
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Hey @VioletThistleKoala

 

Firstly, I'm sorry you've been feeling so down and stressed lately... these living situations can definitely be confusing to navigate. 

 

I'm also sorry you've gone through trauma and haven't had a healthy family dynamic. I can imagine how difficult it has been for you and the strength you've shown to try to move onto a better situation. 

 

Have you been seeing a professional who supports you in your mental health? And are you safe at the moment? 

 

Your feelings are completely valid and it's so normal to feel stressed and upset about your situation. In my opinion, I do feel that the way your housemate brings up concerns with you is not really nice... it sounds quite passive-aggressive and there are definitely so many nicer ways to talk to you about things they aren't maybe too happy with. 

 

My sister is currently living with two housemates and at first, definitely found things quite difficult because everyone had different living habits which got on other people's nerves here and there. I think the key truly is open and honest, but kind and respectful communication. 

She and her housemates set some ground rules on how they should communicate with each other when any of them have concerns, set their boundaries, and split house chores equally by assigning alternating days to do different things in a fair manner. 

 

I think at first, they also tried to have a group 'meeting' once a week/fortnight but only if any of them wanted one, just to provide a designated safe space and time for people to bring up concerns or just bond together and do something nice with each other (watch movie/have dinner out together/play board games). 

 

Of course, every situation is different, but I wonder if some structure and ground rules might help with the clashes in living habits?  

 

Please look after yourself and take some time to do something you love. 

Hope you can feel better soon 💙

 

 

 

 

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