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[CHAT] Socially Awkward
Most of us feel socially awkward every now and then. I can find myself in situations that trigger all sorts of nervous reactions within me. You know the drill - cheeks go red, palms go sweaty and I can’t peel my eyes away from the exit sign.
There are some situations that are garunteed to make those anxious feelings creep i... Like a blind date, or a house party with hundreds of strangers. Feeling intimidated by certain social scenarios is totally normal, and there are a number of causes, like not knowing anyone, feeling judged, having a negative opinion of yourself, overthinking, etc etc etc
These things can all be tricky to deal with and can make it pretty tempting to get sucked into your couch and never leave the house again! Lucky for you there are some simple tips that you can put into action and we're going to talk about them this coming monday at 8pm AEST.
So head back here on the 27th and join the hordes of the socially awkward, and learn when it might be time to reach out for some help. Join us!
Welcome everyone!
Tonight’s GR session is on social awkwardness – something all of us face from time to time, but for some of us, it can really impact our lives and hold us back from doing some of the social stuff we really want to do!
Before we get started, please keep our community guidelines in mind when posting. If you feel distressed at any point, please visit our emergency help page.
I’m going to kick things off with the first question.
- What are some types of social settings that make you feel awkward you’d like to feel more comfortable in?
For me, some events include going to parties with heaps of people and meeting new people!
Heya guys! Sorry I'm late. I got a little distracted with a facebook chat about weird things one can rent.
- What are some types of social settings that make you feel awkward you’d like to feel more comfortable in?
Umm ... pretty much any and every situation, but definitely when waiting for a friend or eating out by oneself. Also going to a place for the first time. I am definitely awkward at the beach, especially the public rest rooms and how confident people are in their bodies, like seriously, I didn't need to see that!
Walking in a group of 3 because someone has to be the person who walks behind, or when you are at dinner with friends and there are 2 convos going and you don't know which one to participate in and sometimes you just can't participate in either.
Meeting a friends friend and then said friend walks off.
2. When you’re feeling anxious in public, what are some examples of thoughts that make you worry? Are those thoughts realistic, or are they unrealistic and unhelpful?
Why are people looking at me? I hope no one notices me? I don't know what to say? Oh crap, what do I say? Don't look for too long!
That is pretty much all that I can think of right now. Oh and sometimes I like to make up weird senarios in my head that are definitely unrealistic.
How do you calm down after being anxious in social situations?
I think this question could have been worded differently. I am calm after social situations, so I will just talk about how I cope with social anxiety. Definitely focus on my breathing, withdraw myself from said situation. If it is before I head out, I ask myself if I will regret not going to said thing. Just remind myself, that I am likely not the only person freaking out internally, remind myself when my thoughts are being unrealistic, but most of the time, just distract myself.
What are some simple lifestyle changes that you think might help reduce anxiety?
For me, I have to practice everyday mindfulness and ground myself. I also have to face my anxiety so as it doesn't feed off of itself and fester into something much more nasty.
What are some types of nerve-wracking social events that you avoid, and how do you usually feel after attending them?
Everything is nerve-wracking, including trips to the psychologist. Sometimes I even regret attending events and other times I am really happy I attended the event when I didn't want to go.
Do you find that you’re more anxious with any specific groups of people? If so, why do you think this is the case?
You just freaked me out because 2 questions were asked really close to each other!
Anyway, mainly people I don't really know that well, especially if they don't understand me or my story and why I freak out over certain things.
Welcome @stonepixie and thanks for all your insight!
Mindfulness is a great one that I don't think has been mentioned yet tonight. The walking in a group of 3 people thing too - lol, I still don't know how to deal with that!
1. What are some types of social settings that make you feel awkward you’d like to feel more comfortable in?
When i'm with people I don't know that well and they all focus on me! The first day of my new job they had a welcoming party for me and because I barely knew anyone I basically stood at the back and tried to avoid the whole thing... haha.
@N1ghtW1ng small talk is definitely a super valuable skill and it sounds easier than it looks!
Totally with you on that @Sophie-RO
I tend to be okay with meeting new people one on one or in small groups, but being in a bigger group full of people I don't know can definitely be a bit overwhelming sometimes!
