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What are you afraid of?
My name is Chelsea and I am afraid of storms, fire and spiders. What are you afraid of?? We all have fears, some of them may be really common (e.g. heights, snakes, injections) or they may be uncommon (the list is endless). It doesn't really matter what your fear is - what matters is how we cope with these fears. If they are impacting on your everyday life, it's time to do something about them and while talking to a health professional is a great idea, there are also a few practical things that you can do to help yourself when you are faced with those fears. We are going to be discussing some of these practical tips and while our discussion may not be quite as amusing as the following video, we will keep it upbeat, positive and we definitely won't judge your fear/s!
Monday 23 September at 8pm right here, to discuss your fears in a supportive environment, and learn some tips from other people who know how you feel!!
Hope you can join us.
Also, it might help to have a read of this story, about how one person overcame their fear! http://au.reachout.com/The-strange-fear
And check out this fact sheet for more info on phobias (http://au.reachout.com/What-is-a-phobia )
What would you say to a friend if you knew they were facing a fear?
No worries mate. I have a fear too.
On a serious note. I would ask my friend "How are coping with your fear? If you need someone to talk to, you know where to find me."
I would tell that they're not alone (we all have fears) and that I'm there for them if they need any help.
i) What’s the difference between fear and something a bit more serious like anxiety?
I think everyone has fears and that they are totally normal. It becomes more serious when it effects your day to day life. I think if you're compromising what you want to do because of being scared, then it's become a problem.
ii) How do you know when a fear might be something you need some outside help with?
Kind of already answered this above... When you're making compromises because of it, and it feels like it's out of your control, I think it's time to get some help to face the fear.
iii) where could you go if you needed to get some help for your fear/s?
A friend, family member, teacher, school counsellor, online, GP, psychologist, counsellor etc...
@ilovemycat: Those are some interesting ones. How do you usually cope if you aren't able to cover them up?
Do you have any coping mechanisms when faced with a fear? And How do you manage and you with around your fear in your day-to-day life?
I usually mentally recite a poem in my head if I really feel overwhelmed. This has always helped me to bring everything back into perspective and it also gives me courage to take on my fear.
@delicatedreamer wrote:
When did you first realise that you had this particular fear? Was it by accidential or a surprising discovery?
My agoraphobia was diagnosed by a psychologist. Before I was diagnosed I commonly saw agoraphobia defined as 'fear of open spaces' which I didn't really think of myself of having it all, so I was quite surprised. However that definition doesn't really capture the complexity of what it actually is, and once I understood it more it made sense to me. Emetophobia was something that I came to the conclusion that I had when I was teenager when I got sick with a few vomiting bugs. It was actually kind of useful as it meant I wasn't too keen on getting blind drunk like my friends because I didn't want to vomit.
That's a common misconception about agoraphobia. It's not a fear of open spaces, it's a fear of being in a situation where one might experience panic (which for a lot of people, is in open spaces).
When did you first realise that you had this particular fear? Was it by accidential and/or surprising discovery?
Falling - I realised because I was a competitive gymnast for about ten years, and would freak out really badly every time I fell off apparatus (perhaps gymnastics wasn't the best choice of sport...)
Things being disorganised - has always been an issue but has gotten worse throughout my university studies
Walking alone in the dark - wasn't a problem until a few years ago when it came on pretty suddenly and I realised by accident
Loud unexpected noises - has always been a fear of mine, I get quite panicky
Big dogs - I've never owned a dog and didn't even realise I was scared of them until I started nannying for a family in 2008 who had a dog, and I would take it to the dog park... I was fine with their dog because I knew it, but I was always super scared of the other dogs (especially the big ones)
When did you first realised you have this particular fear? Was it an accidential and/or surprising discovery?
I think I was always afraid of the dark, since thats when my nightmares would come. I would wake up in the middle of the night, and it would be pitch black, and my dreams would invade my waking life. I really noticed it when I had to walk down the street at night as a young kid (we lived in a rural town) and I would seriously freak out and just start running until I was somewhere where there was a light. I never told anyone.
Thanks everyone for all your responses so far.
3. Have you told someone about your fear (not including tonight 🙂 ? If you have, how did you feel afterwards? If you haven't, what could be some reasons for holding back?
Have you told someone about your fear (not including tonight ? If you have, how did you feel afterwards? If you haven't, what could be some reasons for holding back?
Not really. They're not things I talk about a lot. Reasons for holding back are that it's a bit awkward, and I'm worried about being judged too.
Have you told someone about your fear (not including tonight ? If you have, how did you feel afterwards? If you haven't, what could be some reasons for holding back?
I have told my friends when our conversation deviated into phobias on facebook. For those that I have told, I just feel accepted. My friends just listened and nodded. For those that I havent told, well, there is no guilt for not telling them. It is just not the time for them to know yet.
I never told my family, because I know they will never support me.
@Sophie-RO wrote:
Sometimes it's those very things we avoid because of perceived weakness that actually require the most strength...
I definitely agree Sophie!
What are some of the physical and psychological things you feel when you are faced with a fear?
'jelly legs', faster breathing, tense arms, I feel like I want to escape, shaking and not being able to concentrate are common ones for me.
Thanks for the responses guys. Moving along...
What are some of the physical and psychological things you feel when you are faced with a fear?
What are some of the physical and psychological things you feel when you are faced with a fear?
I feel sick to the stomach like nausea. Butterflies in the stomach, goosebumps and my hands would shake. I would also need to look away from the object that i am afraid of.
Feels like ice in the freaking stomach, and what I'm guessing is survival mode, thinking of whatever you could do to get out of the situation
Physically I tend to get sweaty and become extremely quiet.
Psychologically: I'm usually kicking myself over what is an irrational fear and really is either not real or has such a low risk (like falling through a glass floor on the top level).
Have you told someone about your fear (not including tonight ? If you have, how did you feel afterwards? If you haven't, what could be some reasons for holding back?
Yep, I have. Usually I tell someone if I feel like it's necessary for them to know in order to make sure I don't get put in a situation that I find uncomfortabe. I feel relieved afterwards. I have a few other fears that I didn't list tonight though, which I'm generally hesitant to talk to people about. A few of the closest people to me know, but I guess I hold back because I'm worried that people would ask questions about my fears, or judge me for having them.
Have you told someone about your fear (not including tonight ? If you have, how did you feel afterwards? If you haven't, what could be some reasons for holding back?
I never told anyone, since I didn't think anyone would believe me. I saw things that weren't real, and I knew I just had to deal with it on my own. Plus I guess I didn't want anyone to think I was weak, or have a weakness that could be exploited. I always had a very big inner strength, and I was even a bit taken aback by my own weakness.
Now that I write it, I think its tied in with a lot of things that were going on with me, or maybe still are.
One of the biggest things I was afraid of, and maybe still am, is that I'm not really here, or that I am just dreaming, or that my reality is an illusion, or just a virtual reality, like in the matrix. Taking drugs, and my dreams told me that I was living a lie, and I believed it, and began to fear that I was being duped in some way...
