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TW: Not again
I’ve already said it 1000x but if restrictions are reimposed and lockdown happens again I’m out and I won’t cope. tonight I went for a bike ride, i stopped at the beach not far from my house and was reading some news articles on my phone, there’s a new case of covid not in hotel quarantine in Victoria. While riding home I thought about doing something on the way home. Not seriously but enough to scare me. I kept thinking no no no you have good people around you, but the thought kept coming back, what if I just end it? All these last few weeks I’ve been worried that all of the good things I have to look forward will be shadowed by something bad happening and this is the bad thing, this is why I won’t make it to see my new baby or why I won’t make it to friends birthday in a couple of weeks, covid and lockdowns are going to break me and I can’t do it anymore
Hey @Saltwaterdreamtime , this kind of uncertainty must be so hard to live with, I hope there's some certainty soon about when the lockdown will end - crossing everything that it works as a circuit breaker as intended. It sounds like case numbers are low today, so hopefully things will be lifted for you as planned this week. It sounds like you were able to have some nice family time over the weekend , what do you have planned for today?
Yeah, it’s just so unfair to be put in this position living in regional Victoria, and there are so many places even further from the city than us who are in lockdown, everyone has to suffer through this because of a hq screw up
I hope it’s only this week i can’t go any longer
nothing planned today @Janine-RO just at home. Trying to wrap my head around having no income for 3 days, plus Friday I took off too so idk. This whole thing sucks.
It is absolutely shit @Saltwaterdreamtime , I have family in regional Victoria as well as Melbourne and it has been such a rollercoaster. It does sound like they're doing a good job at contact tracing etc so I'm crossing everything for you guys that it can be lifted as planned.
Do you still have your cubby up? I loved reading about your whole room cubby situation - some of my best ever memories as a kid were when we did the same thing, would watching movies in the cubby be a decent distraction for you all?
@Janine-RO It’s still up and we aren’t allowed to take it down....at this point lockdown 3, we will do anything to keep the young guy happy and if that means taking over our entire only living space with blanket forts, that’s fine.
Trying to space out our 2 hours exercise into two sessions per day, even though it’s still the same time it feels like it might fill in time more/better. It also means we can use more of our allocated 5km because both times will be different places. Also it leaves the option for solo exercise later. We’ve thought this through long and hard.... not much else to do haha.
We went for a walk and the little fella took his scooter, and at this point he is absolutely bombing it down hills and through the streets, stopped to get a takeaway coffee, I said while we wait out the front you can scoot up and down the footpath but go slow because there is people around, and he says “I go fast” and “oh no....move old man” and then yells out “he’s going too slow!” When getting stuck behind a very elderly man going into the milk bar. I died.
Might just finish getting some jobs done around here and just hang I guess.
Ahahah @Saltwaterdreamtime that old man story actually made me laugh out now, I can vv much relate to wanting to disappear into the floor when a 3 year old yells ( my daughter used to have a lot of difficulty pronouncing the word "fork". Sounded a lot like another "f" word. So I was the person with the very loud toddler proclaiming "I need a F**K! That lady has a f**k! I dropped my f**K".... ahhh, good times.
A semi permanent blanket fort loungeroom sounds like a preschooler's dream - and it sounds like despite the crappy circumstances, he'll have some really nice memories of this time
We are working on being more patient at the moment... as this isn’t the first time an elderly person or person in an unfortunate circumstance going about their business has caused such an inconvenience to his scooter riding..., and also he’s the type of the kid that unless you acknowledge and agree with what he is saying he will keep saying it/asking @Janine-RO I don’t know why that person is doing that, please stop pointing... 😅
yeah just doing our best... getting through, day by day
I’m starting to really stress now if this goes for longer I don’t know how where money is going to come from
Hey @Saltwaterdreamtime, I’ve seen your other post and it’s great that you are feeling better today and had more motivation to get out of bed. It’s a shame that there is another lockdown, particularly after such a long lockdown previously. Having financial issues really sucks. It’s been very difficult times in many ways for Victorians I can understand that you have had enough. Hopefully you have more days like today where you can feel a bit better and have more motivation to get out of bed.
Yeah well I was doing ok until I went for a walk and noticed a big gardening franchise working on a property down the street.... so tell me WHY THE FUCK I have been asked to close and have no fucking income but these people can operate!? I’m so mad
@Saltwaterdreamtime I completely understand your frustration that you are experiencing at the moment towards not being able to work during the lockdown. It would be so stressful and scary to be sitting in this uncertainty. I definitely do see the unfairness towards some approvals of work over others but it's important to recognise if they have not been granted approval for work under the 'essential workers', they may be providing urgent work/or doing it illegally which I am sure they will get in trouble for anyway!
I am sorry that you're undergoing all these emotions, I know it would not be easy for you at all.
Have you been able to do any kind of paperwork/behind the scenes business admin while being at home that will be helpful for when you return?
@Kaylee-RO Yeah I have been able to get a fair bit done but to be honest I am so mentally exhausted from this lockdown rollercoster that I went to sit down and get some stuff done today and I’ve been up and done not getting anything done, can’t sit still, brain hurts. Can’t concentrate. So much happening in my head, body can’t get it done.
I was a mix between disbelief and anger, because I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that somebody was mowing out the front of the police station during lockdown..... yeah, you read that right. my partner and I both laughed, we were like, hmmm something is wrong with this picture, and then I was like yeah, that is actually making me a bit mad. Double standards. We better be out of this lockdown tomorrow or I’m just going to do whatever I want anyway.
@Saltwaterdreamtime I can completely understand that, it is so hard when you brain cannot keep up with the work load, especially if you're undergoing some level of stress. But I think it can also be a great opportunity to listen to your mind and body and take a step away from the work, and return to it later when you are feeling that way. I know that exercise definitely helps you when you come into this feeling, have you been able to get your hour of exercise on your own in today?
It is absolutely one of those 'not sure whether to be angry or laugh moments' but I am glad that you and your partner could laugh at it
No exercise yet @Kaylee-RO but I’m hoping I can go to the skate park after the dinner for my solo exercise or maybe the bike park?? I don’t know if they’re open though
There are more and more cases I can’t do this another lockdown is coming and I. Might as well just be dead I can’t do another lockdown I’m over it I want to kill Myself before we have to go into lockdown again
Hey @Saltwaterdreamtime, I am sorry that you are really struggling with the increases in cases It is incredibly stressful and anxiety provoking. It is possible that we can avoid a lockdown - I think the purpose of reintroducing some restrictions is to keep everything under control so we don't need to have a lockdown. So with that being said, I wanted to check if these are thoughts you are having or if you are planning to act on them?
If incompetent Dan Andrews puts us into lockdown over his screw up than yes, how is it fair the we all have to suffer again after nine months of hell because international travellers can’t just stay where they are, like we all did in our 2020, we stayed in our houses, yjeu can stay where they are, I’m over it @Taylor-RO I’m over everything we have worked so hard for being put at risk, if I don’t kill my self during lockdown 3.0 than just kill me and put me out the misery yourself
Also, just so you know, I made some edits to your post.
Morning @Saltwaterdreamtime just jumping on here to see how you're feeling today. This stuff with covid and lockdowns and restrictions is such a difficult way to be living and something none of us have ever had to face before, so it's hard to know how to react. I know for me not having certainty and things being so unpredictable is so hard and I constantly have to bring myself to the present and try not to think about the future too much, it's exhausting and I'm feeling for you.
I can see that you have edited some posts from last night and it seemed like you were feeling upset with the community. Do you want to talk about it today? I know you're feeling shit about it and it might help to chat about it a bit, if so I'm here for you.