So things haven't been as bad as the where. My head has calmed it self down with all that talking and I am feeling more in control and not as if I have to fight to stay in control, however I still have really bad anxiety and I have realized it is getting worse. Its making me not want to go to my class for tafe because I am getting do nervous before I go that I just want to curl up and stay in bed. Its the same with everything. I was hiding in my house before because people where outside they are my neighbors talking to my partner but I was crippled and felt I had to hide. I went to the room and pretended to be asleep. Its hard it makes my chest so tight and heavy. I need to comfort myself with blankets or my dressing gown to feel somewhat safe. It makes me so super tied it takes its toll on my body my hear races I twitch and have the tightest jaw. I tried to control it with relaxation but it can just get me more worked up in the end =\ =\. If its not one it the other I really just want a rest it never end it seems......
i forgot to mention that i need to do my shopping tonight lucky we have 9pm trade here. I have been putting it of for so long because i dont want face the people there but we have no food left to eat so i really have to go i can not stand that many people it will crush my chest and make me breathe heavy i wish it wasnt like this
I am sorry yet again. Thank you in advance.
Sounds like you're really letting the anxiety take over and control you. I have problems with it too and somedays it gets that bad. But you need to remember that the anxiety is not who you are.
With the whole breathing thing, I would suggest you really try to practice some mindfulness or meditation. You would be surprised how much it actually helps with calming down.
There is a lot of guided meditations you can try on there. But really if you do a google search a lot of things come up, even on youtube. Honestly even a 5 min session will help.
If you need to go shopping, that's a perfect place to practice the mindfulness.
If you want to do a bit of reading on how it can help you:
Hope that helps you a little bit Tay.
Shopping last night wasn't as bad as it could of been the shop were very quiet i am so glad we have 9pm trade here!!!
I try my breathing and sometimes it just does not work no matter how hard i try, and other times it works like a treat but i can never pick if its going to work or not. I'm starting to dread going out at all... i need to fight this as i need to continue with my life and study but it seems each day it gets harder for me to fight and more and more of me just want to stay home in bed away from the world =\.
That's good to hear that shopping wasn't as it could have been. I think it's awesome that you managed to go & get it done even though it sounds like things are super difficult at the moment. Sagira's suggestion of mindfulness/breating exercises is a really good one for anxiety - though I totally understand where you're coming from in saying that sometimes it works & sometimes it doesn't. I'm not sure what kind of breathing exercises you've done, but this (http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/docs/ACF10F9.pdf) site has some really good step by step instructions for a few different types of breathing/grounding exercises - they're worth a look at, and you can decide if they're something you'd be interested in trying.
Have you spoken to a dr or anyone like that about the anxiety? It sounds like it's really getting in the way of you doing the things you want to do, and it doesn't have to... It might feel impossible at the moment but there are definitely people that can help you learn to manage it so that you can keep getting on with life without the anxiety preventing you from leaving your house. You could also always try Kids Helpline or eHeadspace to chat with a counsellor and try to work out some anxiety management strategies - there are loads of different things that people do to manage their anxiety, and they might just have some suggestions that you find helpful. This (http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/infopax.cfm?Info_ID=46) site also has some really good resources that are basically a 'self help' guide to dealing with anxiety... You're meant to work through them one by one. They might not all be relevant to you, but they're pretty easy to follow and some of them could be really helpful for you - especially check out 'negative beliefs about worrying'.
Maybe setting some goals would be helpful? If you're struggling to get out of bed, you might start by making your first goal to spend x hours out of bed, then increase that until you've got a whole day without retreating to bed. Then maybe start with a walk around the block, and keep going further and further or doing things which seem scarier, until you can build up to things like going to class. When you look at it as one step from where you are now to where you want to be, it's easy for it to feel huge and impossible - but by breaking things down into more manageable steps, it might help to feel a bit more realistic and like something you can tackle one piece at a time. I hope things are feeling alright today - you absolutely can get through and overcome this. Even just going out to do shopping when you're feeling super anxious is a huge achievement and shows that you're strong and determined not to let this get in the way of you doing what you want/need to - and it's that strength and determination which has the potential to keep getting you through.
I do still get out of bed because i know i have to fight it because if i don't i will bed up living my life in bed like i did back in 2009. As much as that is the life i want right now because i do no want to face anything at all, i know deep down its not normal for me to live my life this way.
I am due to go back to my local headspace this week, she sent me off for a psychiatric assessment before they wanted to handle my case i guess.
I try and exercise every day of the week or at least 2 hours because i helps with my head, i managed 3 days last week. I still attended the 2 days that i am sure to go to TAFE, Its just the anxiety destroys things so i can not enjoy them.
I'm trying to win the battle against the anxiety but it seems to be stronger than me at them moment. I just have to find a happy medium.
thank you so much for all your suggestions and support i greatly appreciate them!!!! <3
Well you know what you need to do which is great and you seem like you've got a good head on your shoulders. Keep persevering with everything, give the suggestions a go and then hopefully with headspace it will be able to work on easing the intensity of the anxiety you feel.
It's great that you recognise you need to get out of bed, even if you want to. That's not letting yourself succumb to it and I think you should be proud that you're still getting to tafe and everything. Let us know how you go.
So my anxiety is still taking its toll on my body and play games with my mind. But at least now i know what is going to happen and how best to aproach getting better.
Headspace where really nice, they were a bit dissapointed in the way i was handled at community mental health. I see the doctor at Headspace she is very nice and welcomeing. She had decided because nobody else wants to take on my case they will. So she will see me every 2 weeks and she has written up a care plan for me, i am yet to know what that care plan is i think i see a psygologist or something she did mention that. I just hope this is the last of it ive felt like a ping pong ball gettin batter around all while im trying to deal with the change that have happened in my head.
I just have to try and keep up with my exercise.....i went for a walk today and i havnt been for like 2 weeks so that a good thing, but i still feel horrible. Whilst im walking i feel kind of ok but it hasnt lasted very long. At least i went!
That sounds like a really good outcome at Headspace Tay! Congratulations on going and seeing them - it takes a lot of courage to reach out for help, especially when past experiences haven't been great.
Good luck with the exercise
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