I've been depressed for the past year, with a looming anxiety slowly sneaking up on me. I initially felt better, but then during an episode, I tried to overdose though fortunately, I'm still here. However, I've noticed that I'd begun to splurge on things, buying games and not saving a single dollar. I used to be good at saving, I haven't a clue what happened here. I've also been more sexual, a growing desire to release the pent up feelings. I feel like I'm somewhat addicted to sex (I think about it constantly). like I want to go out and sleep with a bunch of people. I've been craving dangerous, risky activities: like taking drugs and sexual activities. I don't know what's wrong? Anyone in a similar situation?
Hey @velvetrose, first up welcome to ReachOut, thanks for sharing your story. I feel like this community can definitely provide you peer support as well as some insight into what you are going through at the moment.
I am definitely glad you're still here, and I am so sorry to hear about that dark period; well done on still being with us, you also seem quite self aware which is an amazing start when strategising around depression.
There's a Psychologist called Danielle Intilli who wrote in an article once "Retail therapy is a “pick me up”. Spending substitutes for an emotional void, providing a quick fix. But this temporary lift soon reverts back to feelings of guilt, anger and depression, taking the shopper back to square one, emotionally..." I am not sure if this is helpful to you but from what I understand you're definitely not alone, looking to buy games etc - do you feel like maybe it alleviates some of the depression temporarily?
Just want to link you in with a good resource as well called KHL (kids helpline - for people up to 25 y.o), they have qualified counsellors you can chat with about the craving of risky activities and sex, as well as your depression - they also have webchat if you're not up for the phone! [click here]
It's great to hear how much insight you have into the way you are feeling at the moment and how that relates to the risks you are taking.
In my experience craving risky things when you are going through tough times can sort of make you feel a bit numb but this is only really short term. Is that similar at all to your experience?
Have you spoken to a counsellor or doctor about how you've been feeling?
Hey @velvetrose, welcome to RO! Massive hugs from me for what you're feeling right now, I hope you're able to find the support you need. There are some amazing moderators and staff members on here that are absolutely awesome and always ready to help
i just responded to your other thread.... it seems you have 2 of the same but thats ok
i second @Bree-RO would you consider calling KHL for some more advice and support?
or see your school counsellor for some one on one support?
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