I feel like I'm losing my shit

[mspaceK]

I really feel like I'm losing my shit. I don't know if I'm really stressed and anxious because I can't pinpoint any one thing causing me to feel this way. I'm going on holiday tomorrow for goodness sake. I should feel excited. Maybe I am but I just don't feel like it right now. I'm in a house full of people and I just bloody hurt myself, on purpose, in the bathroom. I don't know what's wrong. I can't see my dr because I'm going away. I don't want to tell my family. I don't want to tell my friends. I feel helpless  

I feel like when I get back from my holiday...if I don't feel better... I'm seriously considering killing myself. I don't know what's wrong with me. One minute I'm okay and then I'm not. And I've been talking to people on KHL. It doesn't feel like it's helping. I don't want help. Maybe I do. I just don't know Fml. :/ 

Sorry  

[Bree-RO]

Hey @mspaceK I am pretty worried about you sounds like you're going through a heavy time, can you keep an eye on your inbox? Just sending you an email.

[scared01]

@mspaceK

 do you need medical attention? are yu safe atm?

putting the expectations on yourself that you should be happy will also bring on these thoughts, just let these thoughts flow through you and jsut let them be

what you can you do to help yourself atm?

@Bree-RO 

[scared01]

if you cant pinpoint anything @mspaceK is there a few things that you can think of that we can help you through

[mspaceK]

I don't know what will help @scared01. No I don't need medical attention. I didn't want to have to explain something to my parents. 

I'm just going to try and watch one of my favourite movies or try and read my book. I'm waiting for my clothes to dry so that I can drive home and pack my bags. 

[scared01]

ok im glad you dont need medical attention @mspaceK

you dont have to explain things to your parents, as soon as you have some troubles please jump on here or a helpline and discuss it with them, ok

we are here for you and we care very much about you

i think watching one of your favourite movies or reading a book sounds good

big hugs to you

we are here for you for whatever you need ok

[mspaceK]

Okay, thanks. @scared01

My sister and I are going to play a card game. 

[scared01]

always here @mspaceK 

[Bree-RO]

A card game sounds good @mspaceK we're here to listen as @scared01 said if you want to talk about anything, remember there's a few support services out there too we're always happy to  recommend, SCBS is just one of them  

[mspaceK]

I feel really sad within myself does that even make sense?