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I just need someone to talk to

I've been struggling really bad with anxiety. I've been doing what I thought was expected of me, getting through this alone. My parents don't know how to deal with it, so perhaps that's I've internalised the need to deal with this on my own. I know people say they are there for you, but I find it unrealistic to find someone you can always turn to. I don't see my friends often and don't have many to begin with. I have a psychiatrist who has been patient with me, I haven't opened up entirely, I have trust issues and hate being vulnerable.  

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Re: I just need someone to talk to

Hey @Beautifullybroken,

 

Sorry to read this post.  It sounds like you're going through a rough time. This lockdown in particular makes it hard to keep in touch with people for sure.  I think a lot of people are feeling at least somewhat anxious.  However, it's extra hard for you as your parents are struggling with it too and you're having to internalise it.  That's really hard.  Smiley Sad

 

Is there anything in particular that you're feeling anxious about or is it more a general feeling (i.e., being anxious about most things)? I understand that opening up and feeling vulnerable is not a pleasant feeling.  It definitely takes time to build that trust.  Have you tried any phone counselling services where you can remain anonymous such as Kids Helpline or Headspace?  I'm not sure if they would help but some people find it easier to open up to a counsellor they otherwise don't know and they don't feel as vulnerable knowing that their privacy is maintained.  Apologies if you've tried these and not found that useful.  

 

We are all here for you Heart

 

 

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Re: I just need someone to talk to

Hey @Beautifullybroken  Smiley Happy

I just wanted to check in with how you were doing

 

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Being vulnerable is a very scary thing and its normal to NOT want to feel that way. I can also relate to not turning to your family and parents for support as mine never really fostered the environment of opening up and sharing our feelings (they are good parents, but it just never came up with our family). I want you to know that there are people who WANT to listen to you and want to help you.

 

As scary and uncomfortable it is to reach out to a friend, it can be really helpful if you do. Aside from that, there are multiple helplines that keep your identity anonymous and you can call them for a casual chat about being anxious or really anything if you need someone to talk to. I've used them before and they are really helpful and good at their job by keeping you calm and feeling comfortable and secure without any pressure or invasiveness.

 

Thank you for opening up about your worries and I hope this helps and that you get through this ! Cat Happy

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Re: I just need someone to talk to

@Ronan-RO @Anzelmo thanks for the support <3. I'm sorry I haven't been on for a few days. I couldn't bring myself here. I've tried contacting helplines, it did help a little. I've also had my first phone appointment with my psychiatrist, it was a lot different than face to face appointments but we can only do what we can in the current situation. I'm doing a little better now, a little numb though. I think right now I need to focus on how I can get out of the flight and fight mode, anxiety arises from perceived threats. The idea that I can't always save myself nor can anyone else frightens me. Many of us encounter situations that we have little control over. That's where my faith comes in. I think the sooner I can accept that I cannot control everything and learn to lean on God when I can't the better. It's probably not going to happen overnight, but I think that's the first step before I can open up a little more.
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Re: I just need someone to talk to

Hey @Beautifullybroken 

 

Great to hear from you Smiley Happy.  

 

I'm so glad to hear that you've taken these steps.  You've tried helplines and had a phone appt with the psychiatrist, which is a wonderfully proactive approach to feeling better. 

 

Getting out of fight and flight mode is a really good way to help deal with distress and uncertainty.  As you've acknowledged, it will not happen overnight but accepting that you can't control everything is a great first step.  We absolutely cannot control everything that happens in our lives as there are so many variables involved.   By accepting this it helps us deal with uncertainty a bit more.  Kind of like being anchored in a safe ship (ourselves) as the sea (things we can't control) moves in a flux.  I'm glad to read you have accepted that; this shows real insight on your part.  It sounds like faith will really help you on your path Heart.