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Not sure what to make of it

My life hasn't been exactly what you could consider 'good' probably for about the past 4 years. I'm 21 and study full time at uni.


Just for a brief background, in 2009 I was in a car accident and suffered major head injuries, 2010 was diagnosed with a digestive disorder which nearly resulted in my death and loss of my large intestine, several surgies and medicines later and they are only just figuring out how to control it, and just recently my dad was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. On top of all this, I have a mother that is in  wheel chair beause of because of bone disorder and have been watching her progressivel getting worse over the years.


I began feeling withdrawn and empty a couple of years ago and went to see a psychologist but it didn't really work for me. I even went to several different ones to see of maybe it was the doctor not suiting me. I kinda left it aside and got over it.


Recently (about the past two months), I've been feeling empty again and seen to lack emotion. I have tried reaching out to friends, but they don't seem to want to talk, and I they haven't talked to me since I asked for help.

I don't want to go to family for help because they have enough problems of their own at the moment.

Since professional help didn't work last time, I don't think it will this time.


I'm guess I'm just not entirely sure where to go or what to do, I really don't want anyone that knows me to find out because I've always be called a 'strong person'.

Re: Not sure what to make of it

Hi Stewie. It sounds like the last few years have been full on for you and your family and you've had to deal with a lot.


It took a lot of guts to open up to your friends and ask for help, especially if they've always seen you as being a strong person and I'm sorry they haven't been very responsive. Can you talk to your parents about how you feel?


As far as professional help, sometimes it does take a while before you find someone you click with. A lot can change in a few years, so you might have a better experience this time round. There are a few different kinds of mental health professionals, so you might feel more comfortable with, say, a counsellor instead of a psychologist. Beyond Blue have a great resource directory for finding different professionals in your area, which you can access here:

Your uni might also have a mental health service you can access, and you can try a telephone counselling line such as Lifeline (13 11 14) as well.


In the meantime, I hope you can stick around the forums. Our community is always understanding and supportive, ready to listen and share what has worked for us. You could try checking out our introduction thread to see who's around!


Re: Not sure what to make of it

I've talked to my parents about it the first time (couple of years back) but when I did my mum started crying and it's not something I like seeing.


Psychologists are a bit of a problem because now that I'm at uni, I don't really have the money for it, I think the uni might have a counselling service though, just have to figure out how to go about it.

Re: Not sure what to make of it

hey stewie 
most uni have counseling services and you can often find them by going to your uni's website. Alternatively you can talked to trained professionals at kids helpline at 1800 55 1800. also im not sure but i think you can get a referral from your gp to see a psychologist under Medicare. 

Re: Not sure what to make of it

hey stewie,


If you go to your local GP and ask them for a referral to see a psychologist under the ATAPS scheme then this will usually get you up to 18 sessions in a calendar month with very little, or no, out of pocket expenses.

Headspace centres provide counselling services for free too. You could look and see if there's one near you.

Re: Not sure what to make of it

I had the same feeling, I told my mum almost everything just a couple of weeks ago, and I've felt this way for nearly 3 years, and she was in tears. She wants me to tell her every time something's wrong but I hate seeing her cry, I could see she was hurt and it killed me. You're probably wondering what the point is of me saying this is, well I just want you to know that you're not alone. There are so many people out there that feel the same way as you, including me, I often get that 'empty' feeling and although your friends may not understand, lots of other people do. x

Re: Not sure what to make of it

I've had a look at headspace, and it looks like more of my type of thing. There's onle about 7km away some I might pop in sometime this week.

Re: Not sure what to make of it

Hey Stewie


That's awesome that you've looked into Headspace and that it feels like that might be a manageable option for you. Definitely drop in and have a chat to them - they'll find whatever is the best approach to take and help you out Smiley Happy


Good luck!


Re: Not sure what to make of it

Hi Stewie,


I've been away for a couple of days and only just read your story, thanks so much for sharing it!


I can really relate to it tho because I suffer from a chronic illness! Something a lot of people don't realise is the impact that living life with an illness can have on your life. It's not just about having a cold and taking a day off work, it impacts many areas of your life, like your relationships with other people, your recreational activities and even getting involved in work or study. Because it can have such a huge impact, many people who will suffer with an illness long term are at risk of developing a mental illness. Talk about a hard run, not only have they got to deal with the physical stuff, now they've got to deal with the mental stuff too.


When I was 16 I was given a diagnosis that changed my life, mostly because that diagnosis meant I got to live. To start off with I was really excited because I went from being bedridden to suddenly able to go out and party. It wasn't until about a year later that I realised how different my life was post that diagnosis. Suddenly I was realising that I couldn't stay out as late as my friends, that I was exhausted after a week of going to school, that people didn't understand why I put on a lot of weight and many, many more things that happened.


I started feeling different from others. I didn't think I was normal because I couldn't do the stuff they were doing. Mentally I started feeling a bit down, but I put up with it for about three years until I was in my third year of university. I decided that what normal people do is work part-time 4 days a week and study full-time. I pushed my body to the extreme and finally it burnt out. I knew that I was suffering from depression but I decided I'd tackle it alone, I know myself the best, so I thought I'd be best placed to fix myself up. A year after that I was still no better. I didn't have any energy, I didn't have any feelings but still I cried, a lot.


Finally I decided to reach out and seek help. It was probably the best decision I've ever made. So hearing that you've decided to reach out to headspace brings a huge smile to my face. I really encourage you never to give up, not all types of therapy work for everyone, you need to find a health professional who is willing to adapt their style to your way of working.


But man, when you finally get there boy does it feel good!


Also something that helped me out was joining a support group for young people with chronic illnesses. Perhaps that's something you might be interested in too, there might even be support groups for the particular situation you've gone through. I found that being around people who were in the same boat as me made me feel heaps better about my situation and I made some great friends along the way.


Goodluck with the next steps of your journey, I'm backing you for a win!