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Sad and Depressed :(

I've been working at a job for a month, and i've been hating every moment of it. At first i thought it was just my anxiety but i'm working on it and i've come to realise that it's not me. The manager at the place i am working has a horrible temper issue, sometimes she is nice. But when she is in a bad mood which is quite often every little thing you do even if it is exactly what they told us to do, she just takes it out on us. I really want to quit this job because her temper if making me sad and depressed, i dread work so much that i feel like if i keep working there i might have a mental breakdown. I don't want to disappoint anyone especially my mum. But i don't know how long i can take this. I don't know what to do and i have no one to talk to about it. I feel like my friends or family won't understand, i've been talking to a counsellor but they only can help you so much. Smiley Sad But i'm desperate, in my depressed state to figure it all out on what i should do about this job.

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

Hey @cookies and welcome to RO!

Having a manager with a bad temper definitely doesn't sound like a wonderful experience at all. Do you have anyone in the company you can talk to about this, maybe someone higher up who can talk to her for you? Maybe having someone talk to her might make her rethink the way she acts.

How often do you see your counselor by the way? If it's not often there are always places like KHL and Lifeline you can talk to in between.

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

@FootyFan26 She is pretty much runs the place, there have been a couple of previous workers that have confronted her by the stories that i've been told and everyone has quit hence why they were looking for new employees. She apologised when the previous employee talked to her about it but nothing changed. She got into an argument with another....

I speak to an KHL counsellor but we only speak once a week. Due to my financials i can't afford to go see one in real. 

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

Welcome to RO @cookies (your username is making me hungry Smiley Tongue)

I feel your pain about shitty managers - I've quit jobs after very short periods because I can't handle how abrupt some of them are. It's definitely not okay for her to be unfairly taking things out on her employees

Are you studying at the moment? Most schools/TAFEs/Unis have counselling services which are generally free. Alternatively you could try a Headspace centre ( which can be accessed through your GP. I understand if that all feels a bit too scary right now though - talking to KHL is an awesome place to start. Has your counsellor there suggested any strategies for dealing with your manager?
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

@lokifish I've only work there for a month and it's probably my last chance to quit without feeling too bad. She just asked me the other day if i wanted to work long term, i'm now considering my options. Tho i don't have an backup job on the line and i know it won't be easy to find one. 

I have an Headspace office near where i live, tho i've been too scared to go to it alone. I don't know anyone that will go with me that will keep it on the down low.

My KHL counsellor hasn't recommended anything to help me deal with my manager. Hence why i posted on here to see if anyone can help. I have a shift on Saturday that i am totally not looking forward to. I physically feel ill. *cries*

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

Hi @cookies Smiley Happy

Sorry to hear about your manager Smiley Sad working with difficult colleagues (especially if they are the manager!!) is a really really horrible experience. Have you spoken to your mum about your concern that continuing to work there might lead you to having a breakdown?

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

@May_ no i haven't she doesnt really know about my depression. I'm not really ready totell her about it. Should i just quit and deal with the consquences? Confused

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

@cookies that's understandable and totally okay that you aren't ready to talk to her about it. It seems like the job is causing you a lot of stress so quitting is definitely an option. It is unfortunately not an easy decision to make. What consequences do you think there would be for quitting?

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

@May_I dont get money that i need and would be tough to find another job Smiley Sad But at the same time i feel like if i don't quit it would be really bad for my health in the long run. There are both pros and cons, but i'm stuck in the middle confused on which way to go.

Re: Sad and Depressed :(

Hey @cookies welcome to RO .. Smiley Happy I think we've all been there, horrible feeling Smiley Sad I wish I had the foresight to focus on  my mental health the way you are right now. The guys have mentioned a whole bunch of resource so I won't go over it again, even if you're chatting to KHL just once a week - that's really good, even just as a space to vent. Also, there are quite a few youtube videos out there on "when to quit your job" or "bad managers". Even if you don't take on board each vlogger's advice it may help you feel a little less alone.


Whilst you're going through this stuff have you been able to work on some self care, i.e good meals, long walks etc?