Struggling through university.
Hi all,
I hope you're all well.
University is not going well for me. I feel like I am drowning. So far I have been doing my course for three years so far, and am only half-way through. Even though it's only a three year course, I dropped down to part-time a few times and failed a bucketload of classes, so it's been dragged out to this never ending stretch. I feel like I'm going to be a student forever. All my friends are either graduating soon or have graduated, and I just feel like that's an impossible goal. It's out of my reach.
Usually my final scores for my classes go two ways. I either get a distinction or above, or I fail. And frankly, it all comes down to whether the subject is interesting or not. Well, I have a hard enough time sitting through a lecture even if the subject IS interesting... If it's not, lecture's are IMPOSSIBLE to concentrate in, and everything I am told goes in one ear and out the other. And getting me to read a wall of text? Forget it! Even if I am intersted I can't even get started. Even when studying for exams it feels like this long drawn out effort. I can sit and read and reread and reread somehting, but I'll never take take it in. And if I write it down, I have no idea what I've just written five minutes later. It's like I forget how to learn.
I've seen counsellors throughout the last few years about various things, but have always jumped around the whole studying issue because of a few reasons. Firstly, I don't want them to think that I am stupid, beause I'm not. I know I'm not. Secondly, I felt ashamed complaining about something like this. Yes, is probably is my fault. I have a lazy brain or something that won't pay attention when I want it to. Maybe I subconciously don't want to learn. Maybe I'm too easily overwhelmed by information. I don't know. If it's my doing do I have any right to complain about it? Should I expect any help from anybody? Can anybody actually help me? Probably not. But I have TRIED to concentrate and I spend a lot of time TRYING to study. It probably isn't a big deal. I'm probably making a mountain out of a molehill, but it's affecting my studies and my life, and to me that makes it at least worth mentioning.
As a result of failing all these classes I have a P average. Nobody is going to hire somebody with a P average. I'm going to spend years studying this subject, and it will all be in vain. This was my dream course, leading to my dream job. And I am single-handedly ruining my dreams.
So how do I fix this?
Comments
Hey @Rhelna, sorry to hear you're having a rough time with Uni at the moment. I can definitely relate to how overwhelming it can be at times!
It's easy to get caught up in comparisons with friends who might be either scoring higher marks or graduating before you, but try not to let it bother you too much, and remember that you're going through at a pace that suits you. I've got some friends who are reaching their late 20s and are still studying part-time. There's definitely nothing wrong with being at uni as you get older! 
To go along with @Myvo's great advice, have you discussed with friends/classmates about tactics that work for them? They might put you on a technique that really clicks with you.
You definitely have every right to speak to a counsellor about these thoughts! They definitely wouldn't think you're stupid or overreacting. Talking with a counsellor about what's affecting you and causing you stress could become a really effective way of dealing with it.
Please keep us posted on how things go and how you're feeling!
Hey @Rhelna
Sorry to hear that uni has been feeling like a never-ending journey 
You're not the only one who thinks that at times, it can be a massive drag. Don't feel discouraged by others who are coming close to graduating or have graduated! Time moves so fast and you'll get there soon enough
You've mentioned reaching goals and that with results, it depends on how interesting a course is. Have you tried keeping a short list of goals (in a diary or planner)? It could be useful to check out how to set goals. This could be a good opportunity to start out small and build on a certain goal each day or week, and challenges your concentration too.
Although you may feel that counsellors perceive you as 'stupid', I find that student services on campus can also lend a hand on study skills. Does your uni offer workshops or sessions with academic advisors or staff on effective study tips? Alternative study tips like mind maps, flash cards (making physical or online ones), and colour-coded notes are some ways to break down information so you don't feel overwhelmed.
@Aria has made a great suggestion about having a study buddy We all learn in different ways, and we all need at least someone to motivate and support us a little through these academic times. You and your study buddy can take a look at tips for getting motivated as a good starting point. But don't forget to take some time out, schedule study breaks, and do some self-care . There's nothing less fun than sitting at a desk for several hours 
Hope this helps!
Hey there 🙂 Sorry to hear that you are struggling with uni. It can be really hard to stay motivated at uni because theres not necessarily someone else telling you what to do- it all self motivation. I personally know so many people that have dropped out for this exact reason, so well done for keeping with it even though you have been feeling like you are struggling. It seems like this is something you really want, and you are obviously more than capabke given the distinctions, so that's really good 🙂
My fisrt suggestion is probably one that you have already heard before buit worth a try haha, a study buddy? I think studying with someone else can really help to stay on track. My other suggestion is to try to get yourself motivated by relating what you learn back to your dream job. Just keep thinking about how learning this information and getting through this unit will help you in your future job. I would really really encourage you to check out the video below. Its all about finding ways to get back your natural motivation, which school and university can sometimes get rid of. I don't think you are lazy or don't want to learn, I think that as humans we are all naturally curious (think of the amount of questions that kids annoy their parents with!), but university can sometimes be so repetitive and dry that we lose this. Anyway hop this helps, let me know if you liek the video 🙂
It sucks to hear you are struggling and feeling like you are drowning right now. It happens a lot and to a lot of us and it is very scary. Being overwhelmed is a horrible feeling and feeling like your dreams are falling apart can really make a massive difference to your mental health.
Speaking to a career counsellor or a uni counsellor is a good idea they might give you some suggestions or ideas you haven't thought of before. Would that be something you would be open to doing?
Have you also thought of taking some time off? Just rejuvenate and revive your passion. Not everyone will be on the same standard and sometimes you need to find what works for you, and what might work for you, wont work for your friends.
Stay strong, seeking help is the first step 🙂
Hey @Aria
I've had to remove your video link as it goes against community guidelines, which aimed to provide professional advice and had commercial interests in mind Hope this is alright with you!
