This is truly so tricky, isn't it? I think COVID has been a very unique time in that the impact has not only been individually isolative, but also medically, politically, philosophically divisive. In the time where we need connection, how difficult it must be to then to also feel separated from friends or family. I'm not a real doctor (as my mother never fails to remind me), so I won't give out health advice, and I'm not going to comment on specifics regarding any policies or procedures. 

What I will say, is that the response we have to friends and family who have different views to us on this issue, is an incredibly individualised and personalised decision. There are no right answers here except the one that is right for you. I have spoken to clients who have lost long-term relationships of 5+ years and who will not have family in their home, because they felt so strongly about this issue. I have also spoken to clients who are able to put any different view points to the side when interacting with family/friends. My point is that neither is intrinsically wrong. How you navigate your relationships is entirely up to you, and what you feel is or isn't able to be compromised. 

Here's a couple of quick dot points for dealing with differing opinions from friends/family:

• Listen, rather than just waiting to talk (as an ADHD gal myself, I feel the pain). When we show others that we are listening and they feel genuinely heard, it is much more likely that we are able to have a constructive conversation with them.
• Arking up at / insulting people just activates the defensive part of their brain; you won't actually be able to talk.
• Focus on the things you share in common - even if they seem small. 
• Appeal to critical reasoning and logic - focus on the facts rather than making it personal. 
• Keep the lines of communication as open as possible - you're shutting off opportunities for the future if you go all out in one convo. 
• Know when to take a break - don't give up, but take a break if you're heated, tired, or if you haven't spoken about anything else with this person for a good while. Remember why you value your relationship with this person, and assess how you feel about the relationship in general. 

That is such sensitive and nuanced advice for what I know is an unbelievably complex situation for so many people @laurenheywood - and I think I may need to keep a copy of your communication tips in my journal to refer back to before I have any thorny conversations!

There's so many layers to some of these conflicts, and that is an amazing answer to a very, very difficulty question - thank you!!

I feel like we could quite literally talk all night, and I'm really sorry to anyone whose question we didn't get a chance to answer tonight. We'd love for you all to continue the convo on this thread, and @laurenheywood  I can't thank you enough for your generous, compassionate, insightful responses. 

I thought this one was a lovely one to finish up on tonight: 

What are the biggest lessons you have taken from the past couple of years?

It has been my absolute pleasure, thank you so much for having me - I feel really privileged to have been a part of this conversation 😍

I think I've learned bigger lessons in the last two years than I have in the rest of my lifetime.

Here are 10 of them: 

1. I am not crazy, 'too sensitive', or 'too much'. I am just the right amount and I deserve to take up the space that I do. 
2. Good health professionals are hard to come by, but when you do it's so worth it.
3. Healing often feels like anything but healing until you can stand on the other side and look back. 
4. I would rather be someone who gives out undeserved compassion than someone who gives out undeserved judgement. 
5. People are the worst sometimes, but more often they're the best.
6. My body is awesome and I need to treat her with the love and respect that she deserves. She is not measured by what she looks like in the mirror or the number on the scale, but by the amazing things she does and can do. 
7. It's okay to prefer books, music, animals (etc.) over people sometimes. 
8. Take your meds if you have them. 
9. Drink water. The world might not be ending, you could just be dehydrated.
10. Be kind to yourself. 

@laurenheywood  I couldn't find a pug saying thank you so here' s the next best thing!! 

I honestly can't thank you enough for your time tonight-  you've been so generous with your time and I know I've learned so much from your responses! 

I love your top 10 lessons- what an awesome way to finish the night! 

It's hard to find words for what the last 2 years have been like for so many of us, and I feel like I'm only just starting to realise the impact that it will have on all of us for many years to come- but I'm also so grateful for the lessons I've learned, and for conversations like this one. 

Thank you so much @Lost_Space_Explorer5  and @WheresMySquishy  for joining us, and for everyone who submitted so many wonderful questions. Please do keep the conversation going here if you want to. 

There's also some great resources to check out :

6 ways to adjust to living with covid in the community 

Coping during coronavirus collection

And finally, if the chat tonight has brought up any difficult feelings for you, there's a heap of services that are there to help support you: 

Beyond blue covid support hotline 

• Call 1800 512 348 for phone support service

Head to health

Lifeline: 13 11 14

Kids Helpline: 1800 55 1800

Suicide Callback Service: 1300 659 467

Thank you so much again @laurenheywood - I know I've learned so much tonight, it was an absolute pleasure getting to chat with you! 

I can definitely relate to being more introverted! I feel like for me lockdown has given me an excuse to be isolated and not doing anything so I'm definitely also having mixed feelings

I love the concept that all feelings are valid and there are no wrong feelings. Hmm I'm thinking although behaviours can be not okay, feelings aren't something we can control so much. Is it about what you do with those feelings?

I get anxious about my health a lot and I've actually found "worry time" quite helpful. Also yes avoiding dr Google. Also I've found avoiding watching too much of medical shows particularly focusing on diagnoses helped me

Ha yep Dr Google can often lead us down a lot of weird internet rabbit holes @Lost_Space_Explorer5 

I did go through a phase where I was watching heaps of Greys Anatomy earlier in lockdown, but lately I've also been avoiding medical shows and going for more escapist viewing @Lost_Space_Explorer5 - I think it's so natural to be experiencing health anxiety at the moment, but it's great that you've been finding things like worry time helpful. 

Thanks @Janine-RO

Haha I still have to watch the newest season of greys! But I should probs take plenty of breaks when I do. The show that was the worst for my worries about health was probably House but it was so addictive!

Hahaha oh I totally hear you about House @Lost_Space_Explorer5  - and so many extremely rare disorders, perfect for a little bit of home hypochondria 🤣

I haven't watched the new season yet either, I have relatives in the USA so the last season all felt quite close to home for me - but I couldn't resist watching it for all of the cameos from departed cast members 

Hi @laurenheywood! Thanks for doing this AMA! I'm looking forward to it, but I might not be around for long.

My absolute pleasure! I'm stoked to be here with y'all 😊

It should be a great chat @Hozzles ! Hope to see you tonight if you can make it 🙂