My family don't value my art
The title probably sounds kinda silly.
But I make a lot of art.
And I'm kinda good at it. I've sold pieces and won awards.
And since I haven't found any work places or even disability employment services that will accommodate my disability, art looks like the best way for me to get any income.
After recovering from carpal tunnel syndrome and artist block and a serious depressive/ psychotic episode and all my materials being in storage, I've started going back into art. It's been kinda rocky but I've been managing.
So I'll be working on a piece and it'll be finished or half finished and my parents will put things on top of it and crease it, or knock it off tables or step on it or let my dog chew on and destroy it. And I'll be really upset because that took me time and effort and thought and they'll be completely unfazed and won't even apologise for destroying something I spent days on.
And like.. how am I meant to get back into art when at least 50% of my art gets destroyed before its finished? How am I meant to sell anything when the longer I work on something and the more care I put into it the more likely it is to be destroyed?
How am I meant to value my own art when no one around me treats it like art and even though they'll start screaming if a mass-produced t-shirt gets ripped they'll treat the paper I've drawn on like it's a blank piece of printer paper? And they'll destroy it without even apologising.
Should I just start charging for everything they destroy?
Comments
Hey @Tiny_leaf
I'm so sorry they're doing that! That must be so horrible 😓
I'm really proud of you for knowing the value of your own art despite them constantly undermining you and your talent! It must be really angering and frustrating that they treat your art like that after you spent lots of time and effort on it. It seems like you've thought of lots of different ways to get your own space for your art but nothing seems good at the moment... Do you think it's worth having another chat with them and telling them that your art means a lot to you and that it hurts when they treat it so badly? Maybe you could also say how important it is because of it being your source of income and that you need better boundaries in the home? Feeling for you right now ❤️
Crap I'm really sorry your family is so invalidating and inconsiderate with your art 😞 Which btw it sounds amazing and like you have some real talent! It sounds like you don't have personal space at home so you can't really hide the art away from them 😞 Ugh. I can't really think of any problem solving that you haven't tried 😞 Other than like moving to digital art so you can back it up but like you have to have the resources for that and it's not the same.. Hm.. Have you talked to them about how you want to make an income with selling your art? That it's really important to you? In like a non 'accusatory' way? It sounds like your parents can get quite defensive easily sometimes? 😞 Sorry I'm not much help here but I do feel for you, the situation sounds like it really sucks 😞
hey @Tiny_leaf
that sounds awful! im sorry your family does that to your artworks. Do you have a gandparents house or other family member that you trust that would allow you to spend some time each day to work on it?
my family dont really appreciate my artworks either. they all requested personalised pieces a while ago and so i made them each one however after a few months i found out they were either given to a chairty or were thrown in the bin. so i dont make them anything anymore.
i know the arts being somewhere else may be quite tough though but maybe it would be worth it even for a little while? its so disheartneing and upsetting when artworks get destroyed esp when theyve already taken hours to do. or could you have a dedicated art cabinet in your bedroom? you could put art supplies and works in progress in there and even lock it so theres no excuse for them to throw it out etc?
@scared01 I can't even get into my room because of how much of their stuff is in there.
I only have one relative nearby. Her house has nowhere I can lie down to work (sitting hurts my back) and no heating so I'm always too cold to concentrate anyway.
oh that makes things difficult @Tiny_leaf i hope one day you can move into your own space to do your artworks. im sure they are lovely especially if theyve won prizes!
@Tiny_leaf That's so amazing that you've won competitions and sold pieces. I have a friend who also has been selling commissions of her art on reddit, it's definintely an approach to work that can be pursued if you find the right market. So I'm sorry to hear your parents are being so insensitive about it. Do they know that you're planning on using art as a method to gain income?
I think setting boundaries to your parents is the best way to do it. Charging them for destroying things and materials might be a good wake-up call for them- if you're going to go after them to make up your losses for materials at least I feel like they could learn that it's easier to just be decent about it? I guess the other thing is whether you can have a devoted art space?
I've already tried to protect my art they keep finding new ways to accidentally ruin it. I talked to them last night and neither of them took any resonsibility or commited to change.
They know that I was planning to sell my art. Most of my destroyed drawings could've sold for $50 so it's a bit hard to charge for that.
But when I asked for $15 worth of art supplies to replace something that my parent's let my dog destroy (he's supposed to be supervised when in that room) dad started screaming at me and threatened to lock the dog outside permanantly.
I don't even have my own bedroom because they've filled up every surface including my bed with their stuff. There's no way I'll get my own room for art.
Hi @Tiny_leaf that sounds really horrible, I can only imagine how frustrating it must be for you after putting in so much time and effort into your art. Did your parents give you any reason for why it happened? I know it must be so hard for you right now, so please remember that we are all here for you 💜
I'm sorry to hear about all of that happening. That really sucks that you know the value of your art and they're just apathetic to it. I know what it's like to have parents who don't respect your space or even make space to live, especially with material stuff. It feels stifling and it's so hard to get around because it's taken like an insult when you give any criticism. I hope you can find a way around it because you sound like you're onto a good thing here.
Did you have any plans about how you were going to sell your art? You sound like you know a lot about the process already.
Hey @Tiny_leaf, that is really cool that you have won awards for your art! I am also glad to hear that you have been getting back into art after having a break. I hope you are feeling better now after going through such a difficult period 💖
I am sorry that your parents are ruining your art. That is totally frustrating and upsetting. It must be so hard to see days of work ruined all in one moment. Would you like suggestions on how to protect your art or how to chat to your parents about it? I am sure you have tried so much already.
