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Burnout
I have got a lot going on right now, and trying to address all of it is exhausting.
I'm sleep deprived and burnt out which is making everything worse and tripling my usual anxiety.
I have no idea where to start, so I might as well start by addressing the one thing common to all of this - my exhaustion - and just hope that it'll make dealing with everything else a bit less difficult.
Does anyone here have any practical tips on coping with ongoing burnout?
Or any self care suggestions for people who are really bad at self care?
I basically just need some ideas to help me get unstuck...
Comments
For exhaustion I find that having a hot bath with Epsom salts or any other nice smelly salts is VERY relaxing, lighting a candle and watching Netflix or reading a book is so so relaxing.
Heya @Tiny_leaf
It's really good that you're able to identify that you have a lot going which is causing you burn out. Without that self-awareness it's really hard to address anything, but you are right trying to do it all at once, is exhausting. I think dealing with your exhaustion is a good place to start and I agree with @JanaG - what have you tried so far?
You mentioned that you're really bad at self care. Would you mind elaborating on what that looks like?
The way I approach self care is to
1. Check my energy levels to decide what kind of self care I need - Is it physical, emotional, social, spiritual, psychological? (If I have physical energy I'll go for a yoga class or see friends, but if I'm feeling tired I might focus on something low-energy like doing a face mask, having a long shower or playing a game).
2. I remind myself that self care doesn't have to be extravagant. The simple act of doing something (anything!) for myself is what's important. It's the intention to be caring to yourself that is important. It's making time to check in with yourself.
I thought you might also want to check out this article about burn out.
@Bre-RO @JanaG honestly instead of self care I'll just move into working on a different issue.
So like I'll do work on getting into a Headspace program, then when I get overwhelmed I'll work on art to sell to raise money for a service dog and I'll just cycle between them.
If everything is overwhelming, I'll add another thing into my cycle of stuff to work on and do that for a bit.
The idea I think is that I'm always working on something and getting stuff done, because there is a lot of stuff that I need to get done for my mental and physical health.
(Yeah I know that this is a terrible way to approach self care...)
Most of my self care is pretty limited and only really happens when I'm approaching crisis.
Also I agree with @JanaG
🤯
I had never thought of different kinds of self care for some reason..
Hey @Tiny_leaf
Thanks for so openly sharing how you approach self care. I don't think the way you're doing things is terrible, but I can see why you're feeling overwhelmed. It's great that you know what you need to get done (headspace, art etc) and that are actively work on getting stuff done.
Can you think of some other activities that you do to relax, laugh, breathe deeply etc? It might be helpful to balance out "taking care business" with relaxation/down time. Self care is good to do when approaching crisis, but is most helpful when done every day. Almost like an everyday check in with yourself. Click here to read some articles on self care that are really helpful.
@Tiny_leaf I think this is a really great topic that a lot of members can relate to. I've struggled with burnout before and it wasn't fun at all... Stress and burnout can make you feel so exhausted. It can be a vicious cycle because the symptoms of burnout can make you even more anxious, and you can get burnout because you're anxious.
What has helped me with exhaustion is doing a little bit more activity each day. It can be hard to do this if you're not exercising much, but you could try doing some stretches, which helped me. I found a lot of the tips in this book to be helpful when I had chronic pain, but they are also beneficial for the mental health side of things. Developing good sleep habits and making sure that you're eating well can help too.
I have also had to schedule in time for self-care and set some rules to improve my mental health. For example, I try to ask for a certain amount of notice before having to do something that requires a lot of work or for me to go somewhere. Some people also find it useful to schedule a certain time to respond to emails or write it in their signature that they will only reply during certain days and times. Sticking to a timetable can be helpful for some people and unhelpful for others. It doesn't have to be a full-on schedule, but it has helped me to have some rules such as not doing any work for an hour to an hour and a half after I've woken up or arrived home.
@WheresMySquishy unfortunately I struggle with pretty much all of that...
Even thinking about eating healthily makes me really anxious, because of how complicated it is and how many opinions there are.
Between my pain and depression, I only really have the energy to do stretches/ activity when I'm in too much pain not to. The only exercise I can make myself do is in horse riding, but that's only for like an hour once a week...
And time tables/ scheduling just make me feel like there's more pressure...
Hi @Tiny_leaf
It really resonated with me when you said about going from one project to another and seeing that as self care. I am a bit the same when I am feeling like I need to some self care it just means I take on something else like volunteering or helping my mates. So I get what you mean about feeling exhausted. There have been lots of good suggestions already, for me because I always find ways to be busy, I started doing something simple for self care.....which is listening to nature noises or camp fire noises for 10 or 15 minutes before I go to sleep at night. It has helped me not let things get to on top of me. I decided to combine self care and sleep hygiene into one 🙂
@statuscaring @Claire-RO those type of things have helped me in the past, but rn I don't think I can do any of that...
I don't have much concentration rn, bathing is a really big trigger for me, and my anxiety gets pretty bad if I try to do relaxing stuff..
I'm sorry if I'm being difficult... it's difficult for me as well
Hi @Tiny_leaf,
I can definitely relate, I'm feeling pretty burnt-out myself right now. Usually I find all I want to do when I'm burnt out is sleep, but watching or reading something that makes me laugh is a good low-key form of self-care for me. I also tend to do short mindfulness meditations on the smiling mind app, which is a good way to just sit with what I'm feeling (the exhaustion, sadness, anxiety, whatever it is) and just be okay with not being okay for a while. It helps me remember that I'll feel less burnt out soon.
I really love these couple of sentences @MisoBear
@MisoBear wrote:
Hi @Tiny_leaf,
"... just sit with what I'm feeling (the exhaustion, sadness, anxiety, whatever it is) and just be okay with not being okay for a while. It helps me remember that I'll feel less burnt out soon."
Such a great reflection that sometimes the way forward is giving your mind and body the time to feel and heal
"sit with what I'm feeling (the exhaustion, sadness, anxiety, whatever it is) and just be okay with not being okay for a while. It helps me remember that I'll feel less burnt out soon. "
Hey @Tiny_leaf, apologies if you're active on a different thread and I've missed it. I just wanted to check how you're feeling with the burnout now?
Hi @MisoBear
I have but it's fine
I've now got the opposite problem, too much time energy and not enough to do with it. (I mean there are things I need to do but can't unfortunately..)
So now I'm getting bored and agitated. I've never been good with this whole "balance" thing...
Hi @Tiny_leaf,
That sucks, I'm sorry you're feeling so agitated. Have you tried anything in the past that helps to get rid of your excess energy? Or is it that maybe your mind is feeling restless and that's translating into your body? It's also sometimes okay to just sit with the feeling of being bored. Sometimes I just allow myself to feel bored, I know that sounds weird, but as soon as I'm just kind of like 'hey, guess i'm bored but this isn't unbearable', I think of something fun to do and I'm not bored anymore/I don't feel bad about being bored and it's easier to relax.
Hey @Tiny_leaf,
How are you travelling with that pent up energy you had earlier this evening?
Hey @Tiny_leaf, that must be so frustrating! Being bored can be such an uncomfortable feeling. It must suck not being able to do the things that you need to.. balance can be so difficult to master and get used to. I hope it gets easier for you though
Sounds like this is a really difficult time for you, reaching out on this thread is a great achievement in itself!
@Tiny_leaf There's no need to apologise It does sound difficult for you. It's hard to have patience with ourselves when it's taking time to find what works for us. What we need and what helps us does change and evolve as we do. I'm sure you'll find new strategies that help.
Hey @Tiny_leaf 🙂
Sleep deprivation and burn out definitely make things harder to deal with! Before I start bombarding you with suggestions, can I first ask you what you already do for self-care and any ideas for yourself that you might have?