cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 
Main content skiplink
Join an event. Happening today.

Embarrassed about how I dress

My mother is really protective of me so because it's getting cold she always makes me dress really really warm. I always feel embarrassed and self conscious whenever I go out because of how I'm dressed. I have to wear this really thick winter coat that is so much bigger than what everyone else is wearing. My mother also always makes me rug up with a scarf, hat, and gloves. I literally dread going outside right now because of all the winter clothes I'll have to wear.
Michelle2311
Michelle2311Posted 29-05-2017 03:49 AM

Comments

 
Michelle2311
Michelle2311Posted 12-06-2017 10:10 PM
@letitgo Honestly I've been thinking about doing that. I'm just afraid that if my mother saw me or somehow found out she would lose trust in me.
 
 
Ben-RO
Ben-ROPosted 14-06-2017 11:47 AM

So there's a bit of tension here. wearing the coat is embarassing, but on the other hand, you care about your mum and wearing it is one way to express that, is that about right @Michelle2311?

 

What is it that makes your mum upset whenever you talk about the clothing situation with her?

 
 
 
basketofmonkeys
basketofmonkeysPosted 16-06-2017 08:36 PM

Hi @Michelle2311, I had a similar problem with my mum when I was about 13! When it got cold, she put me in all of her old coats which were super baggy and made me feel really self-conscious. The way that I got through to her was by offering to do chores around the house to save up enough money to buy a nice, comfortable coat that I really wanted. Do you think that may be something that could work for you?

 
Michelle2311
Michelle2311Posted 12-06-2017 06:14 PM
@Bree-RO Sorry I took so long to get back to you. Talking about this with my mother doesn't help, she's convinced that she's right and just like a little kid she makes me listen to her. I don't even think she cares that I'm always embarrassed because of my winter clothes.
 
 
letitgo
letitgoPosted 12-06-2017 07:33 PM

@Michelle2311 Could you possibly wear the coat when you leave the house/your mum's company, and then take it off when she can't see you? I know that's not entirely honest, but it might be one way of making you feel less self-conscious about it. What do you think?

 
Michelle2311
Michelle2311Posted 30-05-2017 09:58 PM
@lokifish I know, and I feel like whenever I complain it just makes my mother upset. I know she's just worried about making sure I stay warm, but it's like she doesn't realize just how embarrassing it is to have to go everywhere so much more rugged up than everyone else. Honestly I can't imagine any of my relatives would say anything different than "Listen to your mother".
 
 
Bree-RO
Bree-ROPosted 30-05-2017 10:11 PM

Hey @Michelle2311 I am just wondering any chance you could have a one on one sit down with your Mum? Maybe write down what you want to say first? You're a growing human, sometimes Mum's forget that we aren't little kids any more. 

 

Let me know your thoughts Heart

 
Michelle2311
Michelle2311Posted 30-05-2017 01:00 AM
@letitgo I've tried talking to my mom about it but she never sees it from my point of view. She's just afraid that any cold weather will make me sick unless I'm rugged up. And she just bought me my coat which was super expensive so there's no way she would get me another one. I honestly hate it so much, it's literally huge and so long it goes down to my ankles. It's like walking in a sleeping bag.
 
 
lokifish
lokifishPosted 30-05-2017 01:15 PM

@Michelle2311 it's definitely frustrating when someone can't see your point of view 😞 do you have any other family members who could maybe have a chat to your mum about your concerns? Unfortunately sometimes adults are reluctant to listen unless the advice is coming from another adult.

 
Michelle2311
Michelle2311Posted 30-05-2017 12:52 AM
@juna konfuzo that sounds horrible:( pit stains is are no fun, I've struggled with them too. And honestly I have no idea how to style my winter clothes. It's hard to be confident about being overdressed, especially since it makes me stand out.
 
letitgo
letitgoPosted 29-05-2017 05:25 PM

Hi @Michelle2311 and welcome to Reach Out.

Have you tried explaining to your mum how being dressed in those kinds of clothes makes you feel?

Maybe there's a different coat that you could wear which would still keep you warm but also help you feel comfortable?

 
juna konfuzo
juna konfuzoPosted 29-05-2017 08:37 AM
That's nothing to be embarrassed of, I had the opposite problem. I used to be horrified of my massive pit stains, and as a pale person my skin gets red when I am too hot. People would point out how red I was, which only embarrassed me, ultimately making the redness and heat worse.
If you are really worried about it and it seems like something extreme, I would say see a doctor. You may have thin blood and they could give you something to help, being cold all the time could be dangerous.
For me a doctor helped, I ended up having an autoimmune condition.
If it is a fashion matter, simply learning your style and how to rock it could help. Confidence is key, you could wear a trash bag with confidence and people would notice it and think you really own that look

Welcome back!

Join the Community

ReachOut is confidential & anonymous.

8+ characters, 1 capital letter, 1 lower case letter and 1 number

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.