Thanks @Eden1717 and I don't know I don't know what I want 😞 And yeah I think OCD does tend to get worse with stress. I have been a bit stressed idk. I'm sorry your OCD has been worse too 😞

Thanks @Courtney-RO I don't know about another psych

I feel really upset by this idk why. It's like this hole in my chest and it won't go away no matter how much I try and sleep it off

Spoiler

*TW (I'm safe)*

I feel quite suicidal which is absolutely ridiculous I know but this feeling won't go away and I don't know what to do. ***

Part of me wants to change my mind and not quit but how on earth would I even do that now. It was like I was channeling satan in therapy like I was so so shut of and so unattached. I think I was even a bit mean

*TW***

Spoiler

And then the other part of me just wants to die or run away. Literally just considering running away tonight

What is actually wrong with me? Like I have been feeling sad lately and like not wanting to be around anymore but I do not want this to be what sends me over the edge because that just feels pathetic. I'm so sick of my brain. I want to hurt myself but I did enough damage to myself I don't want to mess it up any more. I hope I'm dreaming. I can't do this. What makes it worse is my bday is coming up and never wanted to make it this far. I just want to sleep and never wake up ***

Ahh what do I do? I can't take the feeling of loss but I also can't do therapy anymore cause it's too much

I had volunteering today and was so upset about this I couldn't focus on supporting others it's so f***ed up

I don't know what to do can someone decide for me ahhh

I'm such an idiot

Spoiler

*TW**

Literally my ocd is so bad atm it's happening all the time surely that's reason enough for people to let me die they won't look into me quitting therapy as the reason right cause that just feels so insignificant and they'll judge me for it. F*** I don't know what to do. What the beeep beeping beeep beep beeep this (this is me swearing). BEEEEEEPPP this isn't fair why the beep am I even complaining literally I have such a good life I'm so ungrateful

Sorry I'm not replying on any other threads tonight 😞

It feels like everyone is leaving me (Part 3!)

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