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TW: Getting over a hospital stay

@scared01 @WheresMySquishy @TOM-RO and everyone else


Just a update, I'm doing good haven't been on for a while, bcuz one dealing with emotional abuse from my ex, manipulation and heartbreaks, plus having to stay at hospital for 4 weeks due to a eating issue that had been going on for 6 months


Plus started new antidepressants, and finding myself, finally found a guy who loves me for me, and brings the happy person out, life is hard at times, counseling was going good but then stopped after I wanted to kill myself, but I'm getting better I think, my parents are very supportive of me, and wanting to become the real person I'm meant to be (aka the boy) only thing is I'm scared about things going bad

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

Hi @Cheeseburger! It's great to hear from you again! I was just thinking about you the other day.

It sounds like you've been going through a lot. The abuse and hospital stay sound pretty stressful. Smiley Sad
It's great that you have such a great support network to help you get through these difficult times though. Smiley Happy

Do you think the counselling was helpful or unhelpful?

What are your thoughts surrounding your transition? Maybe it would be a good idea to write them down to share them with your supports and doctors. They might be able to suggest ways of managing your concerns or provide some reassurance.

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

Hey @Cheeseburger

It's really great to see you back on the forums after your break! I am really sorry to hear that you've been struggling in the past couple of months, and I want to echo what @WheresMySquishy wrote; it's fantastic to hear that you've had such good support networks to help you during this difficult period, and you should really be proud of yourself for pushing through everything.

We also have a couple of threads users have made about gender identity, including an ask a pro night here, as well as this LGBTQI+ talk thread if you wanted to see how others have spoken about their experiences with gender Smiley Happy



I also just wanted to quickly double check if you were safe, as you mentioned experiencing suicidal thoughts in your post Heart

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

Hi @Cheeseburger,


Just wanted to check in and see how you are going this morning? We are here to listen if you want to talk Heart


Check out our community activities calendar here

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

@WheresMySquishy  @Jess1-RO  @Andrea-RO hey sorry for the late reply


Firstly, I'm starting to feel more and more like myself again


Secondly, counseling was going good but then she changed, and pushed me to breaking point, so that I'm not sure if I got what I wanted to get help with


@Jess1-RO yes I'm ok, thanks to my bf he makes sure I'm ok everyday and he looks after me, he cares about me and we just celebrated our one week of being together today, he makes me extremely happy 🥰😻💞 it's like I'm a different person I got with him, I'm a lot more happier then before


Regarding my transition, I'm scared asf about going on it, and becoming who I wanna become, as one, I get told everyday I dont pass as a boy 😞 two, I get told to kill myself everyday, but I'm not letting it bother me since I'm getting stronger and stronger each day. But I'm gonna start taking the steps I need to do i can start the transition of becoming who I truly am meant to be🥰


Lastly I'm not sleeping very well since I started my antidepressants, and I'm not sure why

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

Hey @Cheeseburger 


Lovely to hear from you. 


It's great to hear that you're beginning to feel more and more like yourself again, and that you've found a boyfriend who makes you happy. 


I imagine transitioning would be quite a daunting experience. I'm sure lots of questions and thoughts are running through your head. It's a huge decision, and comes with a lot of change. 


I noticed that you are reluctant to transition due to what OTHERS are telling you. You should do what your heart wants. Try not to let what others say impact your decision. I know it's easier said than done. It's just..there are always going to be people who disapprove of your decision - no matter what decision you make. So, just do what is right for you, and if people aren't supportive, then that tells you that perhaps they are not the best company for you... It is harder with school though (I'm assuming your in high-school) because you are forced to be around certain unhelpful people. I promise things get better post high-school. You have more freedom to surround yourself with people who are more on your level. And it'll make you realise how unimportant the nasty people's opinions were.


If you don't mind me asking, who is telling you to hurt yourself (without naming them)? I find it really horrible Smiley Sad How are you coping with hearing such terrible words? Heart Have you talked it through with a relative or professional?


Thinking of you Heart

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

@Maddy-RO I've thought about the transition a lot since I got a referral to see a gender clinic and, I'm just nervous as it involves needles, I hate needles, but I'm gonna start living my life how it's meant to be lived


Also, regarding the hate I'm getting, I'm not really sure how I feel about it, it's like I dont feel it anymore, but the good thing is that I have my boyfriend who supports me and makes sure I'm ok, he loves me very very much, he makes me very very happy too, but it's hard when I dont really trust professionals anymore since my last experience 😞

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

@Cheeseburger  That's no good that the counsellor made things worse for you. Smiley Sad It's understandable that this bad experience has reduced your faith in professionals.
Do you think it would help to find a counsellor who is more experienced with gender diverse clients?
You can use this website to find psychologists in your local area who are interested in supporting gender diverse clients, as well as other issues you would like to address.

I'm sorry about the issues regarding your transition. I'm really sad to hear that you're getting bullied, but I'm glad that you have the support of your boyfriend. You also seem very resilient. I know you'll get through this. Heart

I don't like needles either. Smiley Sad There are some creams and patches that you might be able to get over-the-counter that might dull the pain of the injections. My sister used them a lot.
Another trick you can try is to put something that vibrates or is cold (or both) near where you have the needle. This might trick your brain into not feeling the pain.

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

hey @Cheeseburger
its good to hear from you but im sorry its been so tough on you. I don't really have much to add but wanted to stop in to continue to support you
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: Getting over a hospital stay

Heyo @scared01 @WheresMySquishy @Maddy-RO @Jess1-RO @Andrea-RO sorry that I haven't replied


So I figured out, that my boyfriend was trying to change me, I've been single for almost a month now, I've got 2 things coming up that, I'm excited about 😊😊 my birthday is in 26 days, and I have a gender clinic appointment in 28 days 😊😊 it's the beginning of a new life for me, at the appointment, I've been struggling with some things recently, but I'm getting better thanks to, my parents, and my 2 best friends, they are the most supportive ppl I could ask for


I was heartbroken when my ex dumped, me, but he wouldn't use my pronouns, he/him/his, and used she/her pronouns, and kept calling me baby girl, I'm a boy, and I always have felt like this, but on a bright note, my transition is finally starting to happen, Imma buy more boy clothes tomorrow, and start living the live I'm meant to 😊😊


Also, with my appointment being just 2 days after my 17th, it's one of the best birthday/Christmas presents I could ever ask for



I'm scared about the appointment but, my best friends, and my family are helping me thru the anxiety



But the main thing I'm struggling with is, sleeping I have a bad sleep pattern and I sleep all day, and then dont sleep of a night, I'm not sure why that is 😞 but I'm starting to love myself 😊