TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

[xXLexi_Lou122Xx]

@Bananatime04 yeah... its really does...
I have already tried telling them that what I said was not how meant to say it, and told them reasons why it wasn't true, but they just don't listen.

I don't actually know if they will or not... My leaders said that they have to tell the youth pastor, who will then make the decision if it needs to be reported. I told my leaders that if they do report it to the youth pastor, that they should mention that I don't want my parents told, and that I would like to talk to him before he does anything else.

I don't know what's happening yet, I haven't been texted again from those leaders... and I haven't got a clue if my parents know yet or not either...

Aw, thank you.
I have a plan on how to talk to someone, and my leaders know about it, but it still didn't change their minds. I just don't want my parents to know... Anyone else can know, just not them or anyone that associates with them in that way.

They've tried so many times to get me help, which didn't end up helping at all. And the last time I spoke to my leaders at my last youth group about this sort of thing, my parents got mad at me for not telling them, instead of the leaders. It hurt, and they felt ashamed of me. and now, if they find out that I've done the same thing again, they'll be disappointed and I don't want to go through that pain anymore.

But this is your thread. I'll put an update on my thread after dinner.

[Bananatime04]

@xXLexi_Lou122Xx sorry

Do you think that you could ask your leader if you could see someone from camhs? I am seeing one during school hours every second week and they got them to come to the school.. my mum doesn’t even know! The one I currently have isn’t helpful but they’re not all the same. Could you ask them? It’s free

You can always talk to me.. I’m not gonna call your mum or anything aha. And the reach out reporting thing is a bit easier than in person supports because they’re limited to our details.

[Bananatime04]

Um can someone please chat? I’m struggling

[xXLexi_Lou122Xx]

@Bananatime04 I'm here if you need.

I don't know how that would work...
What do you need to do to see a camhs person?

Haha, well you can't really do that anyway.

[Bananatime04]

It’s a government funded service.. it stands for child and adolescent mental health services. I think tiny_leaf would be able to give more info than me though. They have psychiatrists, social workers, impatient units and stuff like that. I see a social worker. Maybe it could help you, and you wouldn’t have to tell your parents
I’m just having a really shitty night with bad thoughts. I need someone to talk to

[xXLexi_Lou122Xx]

I'm here to talk to you tonight @Bananatime04. That's why I'm here.

I'll have to ask Tiny_leaf about it then.

[Bananatime04]

@Tiny_leaf do you wanna give Lexi some information about what camhs is about?

@xXLexi_Lou122Xx idk I just feel so over everything.. I’m tired of waking up everyday expecting the same pain.

[Tiny_leaf]

Um... not really...

They're just a public mental health service, run by the government.

A little like headspace but 100% government funded.

[Bananatime04]

Thanks @Tiny_leaf

[Bananatime04]

@Andrea-RO are you busy?