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TW: My boyfriend has cheated on me on snapchat twice.

Hi I am needing help please! My partner cheated on me on snapchat 2 months ago calling another lady baby and begging for nudes and wanting her on top of him in his bed we did end up moving on from it the hurt was healing but a couple of weeks ago we had a massive argument about the whole thing and to the point he went to his house for a couple of days he was only going there for the afternoon but then sent me a text saying he was going to be staying for the night because he needed some time to think and I respected that but it really hurt and that night we where texting and I was saying to him that I was worried he was going to download snapchat again and cheat on me again and he told me he would never do that again so I believed in him and then add week he took a photo of my son and I went on his phone to look at the photo and I was going though the photos and seen that there were nude pics the night we had that massive argument and he said to me that they where for me when we where in a better place and I said to him that does not sit right with me and we had a nearly 2 hour conversation at the kitchen table about it and he promised me he didn't cheat or download snapchat 4 days ago things just wasn't adding up for me and I felt like I needed to have a look for myself and I downloaded his snapchat and went in it to find that he had messaged the lady he was sexting with that night. I have confronted him about it he said that the first 2 photos where for her but as he was taking the second photo he thought of me and then stopped talking to her and didn't send any of the pics and then he started thinking of me and that is why he took the 3rd pic but forgot to send it. He said to me that he wanted to get out of his head and forget everything but doesn't know why he didn't both times he said that he stopped it before anything happened. I am heart broken but he said that is why he has been the way he has been since coming home after all of that and 100% committed to us and me and he just blocked it out and got rid of Snapchat the day he was coming home but had it for 2 days. Both times IV had to find everything myself and he is promising me that he will never do it again but I am scared because he promised me the first time it wouldn't happen again but it did happen again. I want to work though this with him but I am also scared he will do it again but he also says he has learnt from his mistakes. I don't know what to do or how to trust him and his to stop hurting so much. I have suggested relationship councling but he wants to try and work it out together and if it's not working then maybe we can think about it. I have a councling appointment next week because I don't have the energy to continue doing this on my own. Any advice would be really amazing thank you...... 

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Re: TW: My boyfriend has cheated on me on snapchat twice.

Hi @ShaiShai666,

I'm sorry that you're having to deal with this situation right now, it's a pretty stressful position to be in.
It's good that you're going to see a relationship counsellor, they can be really useful in picking out reoccurring communication issues that are straining the relationship. You've taken reasonable steps to try and reach a resolution, which you should be proud of!

I would say just try to remain civil with your boyfriend until your appointment next week. During your appointment, be open and honest about how you are feeling (talk about how frustrated you are, and how his lies are affecting you), and hopefully, this will encourage him to open up as well.

Feel free to come back and share how your appointment has gone, or if you need support in any other area in general Smiley Happy

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Re: TW: My boyfriend has cheated on me on snapchat twice.

Hey ShaiShai666

 

I just wanted to build off what Katurian said and say I can understand how difficult this experience must be for you. I can imagine the stress of doubting your partner and the insecurity involved, let alone the hurt that comes with that type of behaviour. Sounds really tough and difficult. 

 

I think it's great you have identified you would like some help and don't want to push through alone, so I wish you the best with counselling. I can speak from experience that I had some very hefty relationship issues and relationship counselling helped me MASSIVELY.

 

It really created a huge change in my relationship and allowed both myself and my partner to understand the underlying communication problems involved. So I would personally congratulate you for being open to this and for sharing your experience on here. 

 

I wish you the best with however you choose to move forward. From your writing, it sounds like you are quite aware of the supports you might need and that's really impressive.