Worst Day of My Life TW

[Blurryphaced]

Ok so today was the worst day of my life Basically I have this book I write my thoughts in that I take into my psychologist and my mum READ IT. I feel awful because now she knows about everything I'm feeling including my suicidal thoughts and I feel so helpless. I'm so angry because now she's going to treat me like some fragile flower and I have tried so hard to keep my therapy and home life seperate but now there together and now my one safe haven where I don't have to talk about my feelings or face social anxieties is ruined. I can't trust her anymore, and now my release in writing in a diary is destroyed as well. 

[litgym]

hey @Blurryphaced

i feel you <3 recently mum just found out about me being suicidal and now she mostly treats nice and will buy me anything which is not a way to keep someone alive i must say ! my teachers are also treating me like some suicidal girl

but apart from that you are NOT alone and you deserve the all the help you can get  im so sorry about her reading your diary, do you think maybe you could download an app that is a ‘secret diary’ i have one and it has a passcode  

have you done any self-care for youself ?

[Blurryphaced]

@litgymthank you for your response I must say that even though it's sad, sharing your similar struggle has made me feel a little more comfort. Your idea about getting an app is very helpful also Self care has been a little tricky, I really haven't been able to pull myself out of my room, but I think I'll try and get out by the end of today  

[Lan-RO]

@Blurryphacedthanks for sharing with us and reaching out. I'm sorry to hear that your mum read your book, that must have felt terrible. I really like @litgym's suggestion of the app also  You've mentioned you've had suicidal thoughts, are you able to keep safe tonight? We're here for you 

[Bee]

Hey @Blurryphaced I can understand feeling upset and awful about this, it's totally okay.
Like you I also try to keep my therapy and home life separate, it feels easier that way. I can't imagine how you're feeling to have to two collide like this.
I like @litgym's idea of an app to use, that might be a good way to go

Have you been able to, or would you be willing to talk to your mum about how her reading your diary/journal made you feel or chatting about how you want to keep it private as it's a space for you?

[cemetarygirl332]

sometimes when you try to keep two lives separate it will just make everything worse. when your lives get combined at first it is rough but then as time goes on it will get better. and if you do not want her to treat you like a fragile flower then sit her down and talk with her.   

[Blurryphaced]

@Bee thank you for your response I made it quite clear that I wasn't happy with her reading my diary, but I don't think I'll feel safe having one anymore, no matter how many times she apologises I have been trying to use the app though 

[Bee]

@Blurryphaced you are very welcome
I'm glad to hear that she has apologised, and I can understand not feeling safe having a physical diary anymore. How have you found using an app?