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Re: Falling for old habits

Hi @Eagle,  amazing to hear that you've not self-harmed recently. 
What's helped you? Have you found other ways to cope when the urge to self harm comes up? 

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I'm leaving ReachOut on the 5th of June Smiley Sad Say goodbye here

Re: Falling for old habits

@gina-RO@Esperanza67@scared01@Erin-RO, and @LeoTheLion

Hi again. Sorry for the late reply i will admit the truth i am hours not days. Now. But tomorrow is Monday witch means work. For some one who is trying to rebuild there life my work have been my rock. I can go in do my job and really focus on it. And it does help that one of my clients have two golden retrievers. LOL pet therpy 

I think my boss saw that i needed something like that so i was very happy to get this new client. 

Re: Falling for old habits

Hi @Eagle, yes, it does sound like the two golden retrievers will get a lot of attention - very happy for you to get this client. It sounds like work is your safe place at the moment, because you are really focussed. I'm just wondering what you can do to be able to get the same level of engagement outside of work - something to occupy your mind, instead of the SH urges? Heart"

 

As hard as this sounds, try not to worry about the past, as it can't be changed. Thank you for being so honest about your current situation. I think it is worth reflecting on the question @gina-RO posed about what has worked, and also what are your triggers? I recognise it is extremely tricky to think about this in the moment, but reflecting can be good. Have you tried journaling? That might be a good way to be able to recognise patterns - there is a great thread about it here. What do you think?

 

We're always here to talk if you need - stay strong. Heart

Re: Falling for old habits

thats good news about your work @Eagle and no need to apologise for not being here. take care of yourself. 

**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: Falling for old habits

@Eagle do you need medical attention?

Self harm can be really hard to beat. I can relate a lot to your post, but you can get there, I'm currently 6 months clean. The only way I got here was taking it a day, even a moment, at a time. The urge still comes but I remind myself of all the reasons why I stopped.
Coping strategies don't always take away the urge but remember as you are doing you're not self harming and that is a pos and the more you engage in your strategies the longer you can go. Finding what works is different for everyone and what works one day might not work the next.
What helped me was having a list of strategies for different triggers and different levels of distress and when to push through and when to seek help.
What has your psychologist suggested? Working closely with my psychologist and case manager helped me put together my safety plan and work on the reasons why I self harm.

What could you do right now to feel a bit better?
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Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire

Re: Falling for old habits

@redhead..

yeah i have a list on my phone and iPad as what strategies have worked before and so on. I find that i blame my self a lot for what happened. Even though it was a random act of his part as we didn’t know each other. I guess the hardest part is the fact and i do apologise if this is a tigger for any one reading but i still have my “tools of the trade” so part of me is like why not you have them. I know people say to throw them away but i hate to say I haven’t got there yet because i would most likely go buy more. 

Re: Falling for old habits

@Eagle tbh I have mine too. (You'd think after 6 months I wouldn't) Can you go through your list right now or try something new.
Also I don't know your situation but often we blame ourselves for things that happened and even though we know logically it's not our fault but we still beat ourselves up for it. It takes a while but we can forgive ourselves and know what happened wasn't our fault. It is never our fault ok.
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire

Re: Falling for old habits

So much love for your words @redhead  Thanks for sending this love and insight to @Eagle Heart

Re: Falling for old habits

@redhead..

how do you restart when i restart even though i know i might “fall off the wagon”again. It’s just hard at the moment. It’s like why bother. I know I’m dreading next month as it will be twelve months since yeah well use your brain and imagination for that. I guess I’m in the low at the moment still. 

Re: Falling for old habits

Hey @Eagle, am I right that as the anniversary approaches you're feeling the urge more so? When you say "why bother" what do you mean? We are here to listen.