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Thinking about self harm

With everything going on in my family at the moment, every night before I go to bed I think about self harm and how much I just want to forget about everything that's going on. I'm sick of going back to the doctors and hearing the same thing over and over again. I'm sick of going through tests and treatments and hearing I'm sorry we can't do much.
What is the point in going through all this shit if in the end it's not working.

I'm over it and I want the pain and struggle to be over..

- these are just thoughts and nothing more

Re: Thinking about self harm

Hey @Talitha93, it's completely understandable that you want to forget the frustrating and negative things going on in your world right now. Sometimes people turn to self harm, or thoughts of self harm, as a way of coping with those stresses and difficult emotions. It's important to know that those thoughts can just stay as thoughts. You don't have to act on them. If you're interested in some more positive ways of coping, you can try some of the self help techniques listed here. Can you commit to trying at least one of those tonight?


I also want you to know that there are people who can listen to you and support you when you're feeling overwhelmed. If you don't want to talk directly to your doctors, you can call or webchat with a crisis service like Lifeline. Would you be willing to keep reaching out and get in touch with them?

Re: Thinking about self harm

Hello @ElleBelle its not normla for me ive always been the one that could handle my feelings and just push them aside, but lately that hasnt been the case. I dont know what I would do if I was to act on them,  should i just ignore the fact that im having these thoughts or maube if i acted they would go away!!! 

Everyone in my family doesnt really know what going on and my friends they all seem to act strange around me and the one person that i thought i could trust hardly talks to me anymore, ( in my last post it tells you about it) 


I dont think i could web chat with someone. im not one that likes talking about things.... I feel bd for dumbping my things on others!!! 

Re: Thinking about self harm

Hi @Talitha93,

It's good to see you back on ReachOut, it's been a while!

I'd agree with @ElleBelle that it would be a good idea to take an action to deal positively with your thoughts of self harm, rather than ignoring them or pushing them aside. Did you have a look at the list she linked to? Reckon any of those might help you?

It's understandable that you might want to try to manage your thoughts and feelings on your own, but phone line support people are there because they want to help, and can offer a way for you to talk things through with someone outside your family or friend circle - so you don't need to worry about feeling like a burden to those you care about. Does that make sense?
And of course, ReachOut is here for you too! But if you feel like hearing a voice on the end of the line, I'd say give Lifeline a go.




Re: Thinking about self harm

Thankyou for the reply
I had a look at the link and it was good I just need to get my head around a lot of things at the moment.
But at the moment I just feel like a burden.
The one person I thought I could trust hardly speaks to me anymore and she does she is very short with me. I know she has a lot going on but I just want to be able to tell her how I feel about her helping me but I don't know what to say to her!!!

Re: Thinking about self harm

Hey @Talitha93, long time no talk! 


Have you tried writing down your thoughts about the help you get from the person you trust? That way you could take your time and really think about how you want ot put it, rather than having the pressure of trying to do it in a conversation. Maybe getting it all down in a letter and giving it to her would let her know how much you value having her in your life. 


I really want to stress that you're definitely not a burden. What you're going through right now is incredibly tough, so it's only natural that you need extra support to look after yourself mentally and emotionally. I'd like to back up what @blithe and @ElleBelle have said about giving a support helpline like Lifeline a go, there's nothing wrong with feeling like you need to talk and you're definitely not dumping on anyone by doing it.





Re: Thinking about self harm

Hey @Chessca_H yeah it has been, I've been pretty sick and been having a few surgeries.

I have tried writing it down but nothing makes sense I have been trying for a while now. I just don't know how to tell her that I value our friendship but I just don't have the correct words.

I'm thinking of giving lifeline a go I'm just scared

Re: Thinking about self harm

@Talitha93 maybe you could tell her just that, that you value her friendship so much that you can't put it into words. I know if I heard that from a friend I would absolutely take it on board!


I know taking the first step to talking can be really scary, but just think about how much better you'll feel once you've taken it and know you can seek that kind of support. You deserve to be supported through this Smiley Happy

Re: Thinking about self harm

I just sent her a message seeing if she was okay because I do know she has some things going on but she won't tell me what and all she said was I need space I have things going on take care..

I just don't feel strong enough to go through this.
Everything seems to be happening at once..
My ex boyfriend keeps messaging me to meet up with him for a coffee and I have so many emotions going through my mind I don't know what to do I'm over it!!!

Re: Thinking about self harm

Sorry to hear that your friend is a bit overwhelmed herself at the moment @Talitha93. At this point, I think all you can do is let her know that you're thinking of her and will be there to support her the way she has supported you, since you know how comforting it can be to have a friend there for you in difficult times.


Please know that you don't have to go through this alone. There are professional services, like Lifeline and Livewire, who will be there to support you emotionally. We'd love to help you work towards getting in touch with them. Many of us here have been anxious about contacting support services, and can share how they overcame (or are in the process of overcoming) those hesitations.