[CHAT] Discussing mental health with your family
For those of us who have watched Lilo & Stitch, we all remember that iconic quote, right? The one about family?
For better or worse, we're all born with a family of some sort. Everyone has a different relationship to their family--sometimes the way we feel about our family is like something straight out of a Hallmark card, all brilliant sparkles and blinding love. Sometimes it's a bit more complicated, and in other times our family might actually be the people who hurt us the most. Of course, for a lot of us here we still live with our families and depend on them for money, uni, and a place to live.
And all that stuff on top of whatever mental health things you might have going on, and navigating mental health with family isn't always an easy thing. Especially for those of us from CALD (culturally and linguistically diverse) families where concepts like mental health and therapy aren't very well-known.
Come join us this Monday June 19th, at 8pm AEST for a chat about how your family factors into your mental health and share stories and tips on maintaining your mental health whether your family is more of a help or hindrance.
Whoa @DirtWitch that's really cool that you helped your mum learn more about herself! That's some amazing support 🙂
I think that you should take whatever measures you need to get appropriate care for yourself. If going around behind your family's back is the only way you can see a psych, take your meds, etc., then you should do it and find other sources of support, like how @Stealth_ninja got their friends to come with them.
If you're still financially dependent on your family it's harder but I still believe it's the right thing to do. Maybe you could see a GP with friends or talk to a counsellor or another adult that you trust, or even talk to someone here on RO.
@redhead ah so you know a lot and might be able to help @j95 out 🙂
Do any of your family members discuss their mental health with you? What can you do to help other family members suffering from a mental illness?
My youngest sister shares a little bit. She went to hospital once for some mental health stuff. But doesn't really like sharing too much. I let her know that i'm there if she wants to talk, and sometimes she does, sometimes she doesn't. I kinda think that's okay because it's about what she needs after all 🙂
Yeah, my mum discusses her mental health with me a lot, which is something I'm still getting used to.
Anyway, I'm heading to bed! Night, everyone! 
@letitgo good night! It was great to hear your input tonight and I"m glad your family is supportive and open about mental illness.
Although mental illness is a concept my parents are still getting their head around, they do talk about their issues and there are definitely times their mental health has been far from perfect. My sister is 15 and I find she's sometimes reluctant to open up.
I try to help my family by being supportive, loving them and reminding them of positives.
My sister I frequently ask her how she, school, hobbies, life, everything is going and remind her she talk to me about anything anytime and I will always listen and support her.
I'm finding it really interesting how many people in families have shared experiences of mental illness or at least personal struggles and that's opening up more conversation about it. I think it's a big way we open up discussion about mental illness in society as a whole.
Hmm.... without like saying too much about it I think, well actually I know, stuff with my parents are the reason I struggle with my mental health. So I can't really involve them, it's pratically impossible anyway, eek. The way I can involve my family is spending as much time with my siblings as I can because it does help me.
My dad gives me someone to hold on for. I also feel pleasure hanging out with him which doesn't happen much so it means a lot. But I also worry a lot about my dad because he is really sick, I feel selfish having mh issues when he has so many physical complications.
I avoid getting dad involved due to some of that. I just try and spend 1 day a week with him.
I'm so glad to hear that you have such positive experiences with your dad @redhead. I hope you're able to play cards with him and spend as much time together as possible
Definitely agree with you @Randomness, family doesnt have to be biological family! It can be friends, or family friends/mentors as well. Or all kinds of people that influence you in positive ways.
Mann these questions are super tough!! I find some of this stuff hard to talk about so sorry if I dont respond properly.
I think just starting conversations about it more so it becomes normal helps, finding time to maybe not talk about the illness but some of the symptoms and how you're going with them, what you think you need, how they can help which is sometimes hard to know but could start to make it normal.
@redhead Honestly sometimes I think the best way a family member can help with your recovery might not just be fully disclosing everything to them. I think just by spending time with them and taking your mind off it for a while, and to experience that feeling where you love someone deeply instead of feeling anxious or sad for once can be therapeutic in it of itself.
I'll sometimes ask my mom for cat pics when I'm feeling down (I don't tell her how I'm feeling because I don't really feel like going through all that), and we engage in some cat-related banter and it really does make me feel better.
@DirtWitch I definitely agree with both of your above comments (which probably aren't your 2 most recent posts by the time this posts!).
@j95 It's tough when your family are part of the problem. It's not what they're supposed to be. I've seen so much of you being awesome though and trying to deal with it.
For me personally, my family have always tried to be supportive of me but sometimes, although meaning well, in their caring they've done more harm than good. They however have no idea I've had mental illness or been on medication as I don't feel this is something I can tell them.
I think it's important to say as well that family doesn't have to be biological family. It definitely rings true that sometimes family is the family you make yourself. I've had many amazing friends over the years who have been super supportive and helpful with my mental health and in other ways and they are like family to me.
Good night @May_!
And yeah, definitely - not all family is biological. I have a couple of friends who have been there for me unconditionally, and I'd consider them more like sisters.
Yeah my parents kinda kept breeding 😕
Our next question is:
Do any of your family members discuss their mental health with you? What can you do to help other family members suffering from a mental illness?
Though there's already a lot of good discussion going around on this, especially with regards to our younger sibs!
With my younger siblings I can talk to them about mental health stuff by asking how they are and helping to recognise when they need extra help, a lot of my siblings have anxiety and one my brothers has an Abi (or a tbi) I kinda get confused, I'm not sure where that is, in terms if it's disability or mental health but yeah just checking in on them and letting them know it's ok to not be ok
