[CHAT] Sharing Your Story
Whether sitting down with your closest friends, or standing in front of a large audience, sharing your lived experience with mental ill-health is an incredibly brave and powerful act. By sharing your story, you can help change attitudes around mental health, increase understanding and encourage others to seek help.
However, being open about something so personal can be pretty scary! How do you go about sharing your story and sharing it safely? What can you do if you're met with negative reactions?
Join us on the 8th of May at 8pm AEST to learn (and give advice) about sharing your story, whilst also caring for your own mental health. 
I think that's a good question for most people @Sarah7714. I reckon it's just that as you said. A simple "Are you okay?" would be good. That way, if they're ready to share, they'll share. If they don't want to, they can lie without feeling cornered. It's always a different situation for different people and it may be especially a different approach if you know them (and even more if you know them well)!
How do you want people to react to your mental health struggles?
I would like people to still treat me as an equal, but also with empathy, and not just dismiss the struggles I'm going through. I would like to be asked questions about how my mental illness impacts me or what the person can do to help, and not have comments thrown at me like "Well, if you just ate better/went outside/exercised more, you would get better."
@Sarah7714 it's definitely a tricky question! I think it's okay not to ask if you're not sure. But if you're close to the person/know them well and you think it might be alright to ask you could say something that lets them know you're cool with talking, if they want to. So instead of being like "what's with the scars" you could say: "if you need to talk about anything, i'm happy to listen". Remember if you ask this that the scars aren't really the big deal, it's the intense feelings that are hard to manage that are behind those scars, so the person might not even mention the self-harm. We can definitely make a thread to talk more about how to support someone, if you choose to have that kind of conversation 🙂
Wellll I think we're all getting a bit sleepy! So feel free to keep chatting, but i for one and going to have a nice big sleep now 🙂
Thank you so much for coming, and sharing so much!
Night night 🙂
Oh boy......could I tell you about stigma. Generally it's like a mark of prejudice against something or someone. Can be an emotion, a trait etc. When telling my story, at this point, I've only told my closest friends and even then I've still hidden information due to fear of that stigma. Basically, I've only told truths but only parts of the whole. Not quite a full disclosure. So far, in my eyes, that's dealing with it for the present so we'll have to see how the plan works for the future.
Thanks for the chat and sleep well!
Thanks for coming online @Alison5 So great to chat to you 🙂 Rest well 🙂
I would be happy enough if they just listened to begin with. Any additional support or offers of advice are a bonus.
It's when people include their opinions without knowing the full story that I don't really appreciate.
- Listen, make sure I feel heard
- You don't have to understand by being through it, but at least imagine what it might be like being in my shoes.
- Understand that it is tough to share
- Maybe point me in the right direction or offer to help with that
Have you ever been caught off guard, like someone has noticed a scar for example?
A few times, it was so tough. I remember once somebody asked about a couple of scars - in front of other people, when I thought it was pretty obvious what it was from, it made me super uncomfortable but I sort just like got real defensive and made it clear I wasn't ok with it, insisting that it was nothing. Then I think I cried but pretended I was ok.
Other times I have almost gotten overcome by anxiety in front of some people and that was a bit shit, they weren't really understanding at first and thought I was overreacting and being a weirdo but I think eventually they became more understanding that I couldn't help it.
I have a fair few scars not from self harm but from other experiences in my life and sometimes a few people who don't know about my past have been like wow how did you get that scar etc, like I'm Harry Potter or something, to make it easier for everyone I think I just lied. The people who I want to know, know and when I'm ready to share with others I will.
I've found that mostly, when people know, they shut about those things and stop bringing it up at stupid times and support you when you need it.
I have been in situations where I felt forced to tell people I didn't really want to. Like when something happened at school, or when I was in the hospital. It was hard because I didn't want to reach out, I just wanted to isolate myself.
Someone said, "oh, what's that? Are you cutting yourself?" (In front of a whole class of people) and then burst into laughter.
I then followed up with laughter and explained my dog did it.
She had already moved on and didn't care, but it was extremely embarrassing and difficult to laugh about in front of all of those people.
If this conversation gets a bit tough, or telling your story does, what can you do to look after yourself?
- Talk to someone who knows the situation already and that you're comfortable with
- Call a helpline
- Webchat
- Email chat
- Come on RO
- Practice some self-care - whatever floats your boat
- Mindfulness
- Sleep
