[CHAT] Socially Awkward
Most of us feel socially awkward every now and then. I can find myself in situations that trigger all sorts of nervous reactions within me. You know the drill - cheeks go red, palms go sweaty and I can’t peel my eyes away from the exit sign.
There are some situations that are garunteed to make those anxious feelings creep i... Like a blind date, or a house party with hundreds of strangers. Feeling intimidated by certain social scenarios is totally normal, and there are a number of causes, like not knowing anyone, feeling judged, having a negative opinion of yourself, overthinking, etc etc etc
These things can all be tricky to deal with and can make it pretty tempting to get sucked into your couch and never leave the house again! Lucky for you there are some simple tips that you can put into action and we're going to talk about them this coming monday at 8pm AEST.
So head back here on the 27th and join the hordes of the socially awkward, and learn when it might be time to reach out for some help. Join us!
Just have fun on my holiday and not be freaked out by the crowds, after all I survived London
Thanks again for all the awesome insight tonight guys!
Time to wrap it up with the final question and summary for tonight.
10.What are three things you feel like you could do over the next week to reduce your social anxiety?
Personally I plan on reducing coffee & tea because i've been out of control lately, getting more sleep, and talking to someone that I don't normally talk to much at work.
What are three things you feel like you could do over the next week to reduce your social anxiety?
Well I have a psychologist appt tomorrow, but that is unrealistic for most people. So just challenging my anxiety and asking it what has got it worrying so much. Usually it is something so silly, that I just tell my anxiety to stop being irrational and just go on about my day.
If your anxiety is really impacting your life going to your Gp, a therapist or a psychiatrist is a good place to start. If your anxious about that confiding in a friend can be helpful
Time for the second last question for tonight guys!
9. Sometimes self-help strategies aren’t enough to ease our social anxiety symptoms. Where would you go for extra support to cope with social anxiety?
I think that everyone experiences anxiety to a different extent and sometimes the self-help strategies don’t cut it – sometimes it can all be too overwhelming and you just need extra support. I would definitely look into seeing my local GP to get a referral to a psychologist, or i'd give headspace a call.
Sometimes self-help strategies aren’t enough to ease our social anxiety symptoms. Where would you go for extra support to cope with social anxiety?
I went to headspace when things weren't going too well for me. My GP and then psychologist helped me out so much! They gave me heaps of tips on overcoming things. Of course it is a work in progress, but things get easier.
@benjamin_ wrote:
Sometimes self-help strategies aren’t enough to ease our social anxiety symptoms. Where would you go for extra support to cope with social anxiety?
Yea I wanted to say that going by what everyone is saying here feeling uncomfortable in social situations is something that most people deal with at some point, and it’s totally normal. But for some people, however, social contact can be a massive source of anxiety to the point where it's negatively affecting their day-to-day life. ANd that's when it might be time to reach out for extra support, if it's affecting your day-to-day life, your study, work or relationships etc....
Psychologist
GP
Teacher
I think people trained to help can be better sometimes but that doesn't mean all and it also doesn't mean that friends and family can't help you either.
I agree @FootyFan26
Some of the best help and support i've received has been from my friends and family.
Oh I know this is a bit off topic but while yr all here I wanted to remind you we are having a special session tomorrow night in conjunction with the ABC2's Australians on Drugs program.... The idea is to watch the show and chat at the same time, then a bit of a discussion afterwards...
Hope to see some of you there! It's all happening at reachout.com/ausdrugs
Here is Ben's great summary of tonight's discussion...
• Some of the types of social settings we feel anxious that we’d like to feel more comfortable in include meeting new people, going to parties, small talk, when attention is focused on us and when people sing happy birthday to us!
• When we’re in public and feel anxious, sometimes we have thoughts like “I will say something weird and people will think I’m weird and not want to talk to me anymore”. We might worry what others will think, that we might offend them, or that they might misinterpret what we were trying to communicate. Often these thoughts are unrealistic and unhelpful and need to be challenged!
• To calm down after being anxious in social situations, some ideas include reminding yourself of other situations that you felt anxious in where everything worked out okay, walking away from the crowd and taking a breather, playing music and exercising.
• Some lifestyle changes that can help reduce anxiety include reducing caffeine, smoking, improving your diet, exercising, meditating.
• Some nerve-wracking social events we avoid include parties, going to new places, meeting family of friends, doing oral presentations.
• Sometimes we can feel more anxious with specific groups of people. This might include people who are highly extraverted (if you’re more introverted), being at events where you only know one person.
• Some skills that are important in social situations include assertiveness and communication skills, being able to speak up and stand up for yourself and others, not letting yourself be walked over, listening, CBT – all of which can both be developed through social skills classes, with a psychologist or counselor, or through practice.
• Some simple ways to start building social skills on a daily basis may include using opportunities at work to gain experience interacting with people, accompanying an outgoing friend to a party, practicing online, break nerve-wracking things down into smaller tasks.
• If the self-help strategies aren’t enough to handle your social anxiety, you could try having a chat to family, friends, or you can always see your local GP to get a referral to see a psychologist or give headspace a call!
try new things among friends. Use them as a stepping stone.
@redhead I like your point about trying new things among friends.
I've done stuff like accompany a friend who's much more outgoing than me to a party and found that it really brought me out of my shell.
Next question guys!
8. Becoming more comfortable in social situations that make us highly anxious can take time, so sometimes it can be best to start small rather than trying to face our biggest fears right away! What are some simple ways to start practicing social skills on a daily basis?
Personally I think the small lifestyle changes (diet, exercise sleep) are a great start, but to really challenge the behavior, it can help to develop a hierarchy to slowly build yourself up to face the events that make you most anxious. It might range from something as simple as saying hello to a co-worker to introducing yourself to someone new at a party.
Becoming more comfortable in social situations that make us highly anxious can take time, so sometimes it can be best to start small rather than trying to face our biggest fears right away! What are some simple ways to start practicing social skills on a daily basis?
Doing one thing that makes you anxious, a day! Well that is what I do.
If it is so nerve-wracking that you just can't even get ready, just get ready. Break everything down into smaller parts. It seems weird, but I have been so wreaked by my anxiety that I just couldn't get out of bed. The point is to get out of bed anyway, even if it is just to make some tea or to have a shower. Then the next step might be getting ready. Once comfortable with that, leaving the house. When that isn't such a big killer, catching buses, then walking past the place you need to go.
All in all, sometimes you just need a moment of courage. <--- That is how I ended up seeking help.
Making calls is sort of the same. Enter in the numbers. Sit there for a while, and then just press call. If you freak out too much after pressing call, just hang up. I know when I call, I get all like 'Please don't answer, please don't answer!' It actually happened once, and boy I wished they had answered.
