Betrayed by close friends

[MisoBear]

Hey @Jane_the_cat. I'm sorry you've had to go through this, I had a similar thing in primary school where I was taken out of classes for G&T stuff and it did affect my friendships for a little while. If you feel comfortable it might actually be better to just go to your year advisor with your documentation? In my experience, schools tend to take things a bit more seriously when it's not an anonymous thing, as it seems less more credible. Would that be something you'd feel okay doing? I'm really glad your friend is starting to understand how hard this has been for you. What's your support system like otherwise?

[Jane_the_cat]

I would just go to the year advisor I’m scared that I’d cry in front of him and that would just be humiliating. As for other support systems only one person actually knows about the situation and I don’t see her very often.

[Tiny_leaf]

@Jane_the_cat that sounds like a really good idea, and it's great that your best friend's being supportive.

I know that it can really help get teachers/ school staff moving once they actually have something in writing. Do you think it'd be a good idea to photocopy the note before giving it to the year adviser for your own "record"?

[MisoBear]

Ah, I get it. I don't know your teacher but maybe he might be more receptive than you think. Teachers are trained to be able to handle this kind of stuff, and a lot of the times when I've gone to teachers about bullying stuff they've actually been pretty cool and supportive, even if I've cried in front of them. But I get it if you feel like you don't want to talk to him, you've got to do what is right for you. I'm wondering if you might be able to talk to your parents or an adult you trust about it? 

[Jane_the_cat]

I’ve always had trouble telling my parents about this kind of thing and I don’t really know any other adults. I think I should try fixing it on my own before going to my parents 

[MisoBear]

Talking to parents about this sort of stuff is hard, huh? I remember finding it super tough to talk to my parents about getting bullied at school, I almost felt ashamed at the time. Now I realise that it wasn't my fault, and it was nothing I did wrong. They were just going through a bunch of stuff and taking it out on me. At the time I thought I would never have friends because this tiny group of kids hated me...I was SO wrong. I have so many awesome friends now who I vibe with, and they don't judge me, they just like me for me. You seem so cool, and I promise this will happen for you too. If you feel okay with it, maybe you could reach out to the person you were talking about that you don't see often, maybe a phone call or texting them might help?

[xXLexi_Lou122Xx]

Aww... I'm so sorry you've had to go through this @Jane_the_cat!
I can relate soo much to that... It really hurts. Well done on Reaching Out. I know that I found it really hard too. I eventually became depressed after that. My friends had never made time for me, which was painful, so I began writing things on my arm that I shouldn't have. We are still friends now, but it hurts me a little bit every now and then.

Do you have a guidance counsellor at your school? I know that my one now is really helpful.

I would like to add to @MisoBear's suggestion of texting. I learnt the hard way, that texting is a bad idea. I tried talking to my friend through text, and she got the message the wrong way, if you get the gist. A phone call would be better.

Here for you!

//Nothing is impossible. The word itself says "I'm Possible"//

[Jane_the_cat]

I’ve heard the counsellor at my school isn’t very nice and I have no way to see her without people knowing and that would just be embarrassing 

[Taylor-RO]

Hey @Jane_the_cat, that really sucks. Other people might say she isn't very nice but you might actually like her. Everyone has different opinions and ways of thinking.. At the end of the day, you won't know until you try Most counselors just want to try and help you with what you are struggling with. Being embarrassed can be quite a normal reaction.. I remember feeling the same way.. but there is no need to be ashamed about getting support. It doesn't mean there is something wrong with you or that you aren't normal.. we all struggle and need extra support at time. I used to just slip away to see the counselor at recess, lunch, during class or after school. All of this sounds like a lot to deal with and you don't have to do it alone.. how do you think your parents might react if you told them about what has been going on? We are here for you

[WheresMySquishy]

@Jane_the_cat  How are you feeling today?

Are you able to request that the sessions are kept confidential? You could ask for her word in writing about when she can reveal what is discussed and who she can reveal it to.