Feeling overwhelmed

Hey @Tiny_leaf  that sounds very frustrating, feeling like your mental health had stabilized but not in a good way and now things are getting worse for you, I'm wondering what you have in place for if things get really bad for you?

Certainly sounds like things are never boring in Tiny Leaf Land indeed! What have you got on today? 

My mental health had sorta stabilized. But it stabilized in a bad place, which meant I eventually started feeling shit about it.

So now my mental health is getting worse.

It's never boring here in Tiny Leaf Land.

Thanks @Eden1717 and @WheresMySquishy 

@Tiny_leaf  I'm so sorry you had a bad experience with the rheumatologist. 😞 It's so frustrating having to look around for doctors that are competent and have a good bedside manner. One bad appointment can cause a lot of damage. You're probably right about the Star Wars analogy.

@Tiny_leaf  I am sorry the doctors didnt go well. doctors can be frustrating when they arent listening or understanding you properly. I have had my fare share of shitty doctors and it can be super upsetting and disheartening when all you are trying to do is get some help.  

Sorry @Hannah-RO, didn't get the notification there...

The rheumatologist I saw basically gave me a diagnosis that meant I had no accosiated pain. 

When at the time I saw him I was struggling to walk and in constant pain.

He just ignored it all the.... I don't even have words for him. Fucking hell.

He could've given me the correct diagnosis. He could've helped me get adequate treatment. But he just did nothing and said he couldn't help.

He left me feeling like my body was falling apart for no reason when a proper diagnosis could've saved me from that.

You're absolutely right that there is a lot of detail, it can be quite overwhelming at first for sure, I swear it gets easier and you will stop walking into things!

That sounds like a pretty horrible doctors appointment to have made you feel like that, was there anything in particular about yesterdays appointment that was so awful? I'm sorry they are always so hate-inducing 

Also this Star Wars analogy made me laugh a lot. I have to agree, a bit of compassion and help goes a long way even if you're Darth Vader.

@Hannah-RO hehe, good to know I'm not alone 

I'm still getting used to the overstimulation when I wear them, there so much detail...

I'm not going well, I had to have a doctor's appointment yesterday.

And like with most doctor's appointments it left me angry and full of a general all-encompassing hatred for humanity so that was no fun.

Seriously I swear the reason the dark side exists in Star Wars is the characters having to deal with irritating rheumatologists and psychiatrists.

Get Darth Vader a good doctor and he'd probably calm down considerably.

Hey @Tiny_leaf I've  just been catching up on this thread - I completely relate to running into things when I started wearing glasses! But you do get used to them I promise.

Its understandable to be frustrated by talks of the distant future when things are so difficult and uncertain, how are you going today?

Oh though at least mum made a psychiatrist appointment.

@Andrea-RO I can't because it's my OT asking.

That's really shit @Tiny_leaf, I'm really sorry that you have to go through that right now

It's sometimes really frustrating when people keep putting focus on the distant future, especially in a time like now where it's hard to predict what the future will even look like. Sometimes I find a good way to deflect the question is by saying something like "I don't really feel that's relevant right now, but I can tell you my plan for the next week (or the next couple of days/tomorrow/etc)"

@Bre-RO I feel lonely and sad and angry and broken.

Even though I'm no longer at a point where my life is constantly at risk it still feels like all my energy is being put towards surviving. 

I'm tired of people telling me to make long term goals when I'm too fucking busy trying to meet my needs as they come up to even think about what might happen in the future.

How are you today @Tiny_leaf ? Hope dinner with your dad was nice 🙂 

I feel tired and lonely.

But I got to go to a restaurant with dad so that's distracting me a bit.

@Bananatime04 I hope I do get used to it quickly yeah..

It's pretty frightening...

Hopefully the lockdown will help get it under control though..

@Tiny_leaf  Yea I saw this earlier this morning on instagram.. Victoria  

that’s so good that you can see better! It’s a shame you’re running into things but I think you’ll get used to it soon

I have glasses now and like.. I can see everything so clearly, but it also looks further away.

Which is how an improvement in my vision resulted in me repeatedly walking into things.

Oops.

@Bananatime04 we were lucky here, because there weren't many cases to begin with.

I think we have some active cases still but they're either in hospital or quarantine.

I hope it goes well too...

Thanks @Bananatime04 

Yeah the lockdown is pretty extreme, I just hope it'll be effective...

Hopefully everyone will be able to safely continue with thier lives soon but even then there will be fallout after.

I've just spent all my energy dealing with my family, so idk how much sleep is going to do.

Ugh and I have to meet a new person tomorrow. Fortunately we share a burning hatred of the current NDIS 

He's going to try to help me get funding for training the service dog.

That's good.

Just remember that if you need to talk, heaps of people are are willing to listen.

@Bananatime04 I got to go to my cousin's house and pat thier doggies!!

My family did a video chat with my auntie in Victoria. She's not doing great because of everything that's happening over there...

I sort of wish she'd stayed in WA after the last time she came over.

I'm mostly just tired now.

How about you?