TW: Getting over a hospital stay
@scared01 @WheresMySquishy @TOM-RO and everyone else
Just a update, I'm doing good haven't been on for a while, bcuz one dealing with emotional abuse from my ex, manipulation and heartbreaks, plus having to stay at hospital for 4 weeks due to a eating issue that had been going on for 6 months
Plus started new antidepressants, and finding myself, finally found a guy who loves me for me, and brings the happy person out, life is hard at times, counseling was going good but then stopped after I wanted to kill myself, but I'm getting better I think, my parents are very supportive of me, and wanting to become the real person I'm meant to be (aka the boy) only thing is I'm scared about things going bad
Hey @Cheeseburger,
It's really great to see you back on the forums after your break! I am really sorry to hear that you've been struggling in the past couple of months, and I want to echo what @WheresMySquishy wrote; it's fantastic to hear that you've had such good support networks to help you during this difficult period, and you should really be proud of yourself for pushing through everything.
We also have a couple of threads users have made about gender identity, including an ask a pro night here, as well as this LGBTQI+ talk thread if you wanted to see how others have spoken about their experiences with gender 
I also just wanted to quickly double check if you were safe, as you mentioned experiencing suicidal thoughts in your post 
Hi @Cheeseburger,
Just wanted to check in and see how you are going this morning? We are here to listen if you want to talk
Hi @Cheeseburger! It's great to hear from you again! I was just thinking about you the other day.
It sounds like you've been going through a lot. The abuse and hospital stay sound pretty stressful. 
It's great that you have such a great support network to help you get through these difficult times though.
Do you think the counselling was helpful or unhelpful?
What are your thoughts surrounding your transition? Maybe it would be a good idea to write them down to share them with your supports and doctors. They might be able to suggest ways of managing your concerns or provide some reassurance.
@WheresMySquishy @Jess1-RO @Andrea-RO hey sorry for the late reply
Firstly, I'm starting to feel more and more like myself again
Secondly, counseling was going good but then she changed, and pushed me to breaking point, so that I'm not sure if I got what I wanted to get help with
@Jess1-RO yes I'm ok, thanks to my bf he makes sure I'm ok everyday and he looks after me, he cares about me and we just celebrated our one week of being together today, he makes me extremely happy 🥰😻💞 it's like I'm a different person I got with him, I'm a lot more happier then before
Regarding my transition, I'm scared asf about going on it, and becoming who I wanna become, as one, I get told everyday I dont pass as a boy 😞 two, I get told to kill myself everyday, but I'm not letting it bother me since I'm getting stronger and stronger each day. But I'm gonna start taking the steps I need to do i can start the transition of becoming who I truly am meant to be🥰
Lastly I'm not sleeping very well since I started my antidepressants, and I'm not sure why
its good to hear from you but im sorry its been so tough on you. I don't really have much to add but wanted to stop in to continue to support you
Heyo @scared01 @WheresMySquishy @Maddy-RO @Jess1-RO @Andrea-RO sorry that I haven't replied
So I figured out, that my boyfriend was trying to change me, I've been single for almost a month now, I've got 2 things coming up that, I'm excited about 😊😊 my birthday is in 26 days, and I have a gender clinic appointment in 28 days 😊😊 it's the beginning of a new life for me, at the appointment, I've been struggling with some things recently, but I'm getting better thanks to, my parents, and my 2 best friends, they are the most supportive ppl I could ask for
I was heartbroken when my ex dumped, me, but he wouldn't use my pronouns, he/him/his, and used she/her pronouns, and kept calling me baby girl, I'm a boy, and I always have felt like this, but on a bright note, my transition is finally starting to happen, Imma buy more boy clothes tomorrow, and start living the live I'm meant to 😊😊
Also, with my appointment being just 2 days after my 17th, it's one of the best birthday/Christmas presents I could ever ask for
I'm scared about the appointment but, my best friends, and my family are helping me thru the anxiety
But the main thing I'm struggling with is, sleeping I have a bad sleep pattern and I sleep all day, and then dont sleep of a night, I'm not sure why that is 😞 but I'm starting to love myself 😊
Hi again @Cheeseburger! It's good to hear from you!
It's awful how your ex treated you. 😞 You definitely deserve to be treated with love and respect, and that includes being addressed by your preferred pronouns.
But I'm glad that you're excited about the appointment, your birthday and transition and that you're learning to love yourself! 🙂 It's awesome that your best friends and family are supportive of you.
Like you, I also struggle with my sleeping patterns. I'm pretty much nocturnal on some days at the moment. 
Sometimes, I sleep better if I don't take a nap during the day. This article has a lot of other helpful tips too. We also had a discussion with some other tips on the forums.
Different things work for different people though. Have you found anything that helps you?
it also sounds like some good positives in there too which is fantastic. hope all your appointments go well and you can start to move forward too
Hey guys @scared01 @WheresMySquishy @Maddy-RO @Jess1-RO @Andrea-RO happy New year.
Anyways just an update, I started with a new mental health team 🥺 it's going good.
On the 20th, I start my transition, and on March 5th I'll be starting hormone blockers (Aka going thru boy puberty)
Anyways live is starting to become better for me, I feel more like myself now, and I've started loving myself now 🥰🥺 but mostly I have supportive friends, family and soon to be girlfriend (me And her are taking things extremely slow) and I'm happy with myself for the first time in a long time
Had a bit of a couple breakdowns, but I'm getting better. Anyways just thought I should pop in and give u guys an update
Hihi 🥺👉👈👀 thought I’d come in and give u all an update 🥺👀👉👈 @scared01 @WheresMySquishy @Bre-RO @Maddy-RO @Jess1-RO good news, I’ve been on Testosterone for almost a week now 🥰🥺 ive gotten so much more confident about myself 🥺🥰👉👈👀 I’m a very happy boy, lately 🥰 I’ve got amazing friends who have supported me a lot
The only thing that hurts Rn, is my ex from 2 years ago is trying to come back into my life, and change me back to being a girl, he said being trans is a choice, it’s not tho, but I’m not letting it get to me 🥺👀 ive got so much happening Rn that I’m very happy about myself 🥺🥰
I'm so glad that good things are happening in your life @Cheeseburger! It must be a really exciting time. 🙂 I've missed talking to you.
Good on you for feeling more confident about yourself! It's great that you have some really supportive friends and family members as well. 🙂
I'm sorry that your ex is hassling you, but I think it's awesome that you aren't giving in to his demands and letting his negativity affect you.
Hey @Cheeseburger ,
It's so wonderful to read this update, thank you so much for filling us in on how you're going. It sounds like being on testosterone is going really well for you so far, and you can really hear the happiness coming out through your words. It's fantastic to hear that you've got supportive friends, it sounds like you're in a really great place. We are so happy for you
It's disappointing to hear that your ex is trying to make you feel bad about your transition - but it's great to hear that you're not letting it get to you.
Congratulations, it sounds like you've come a really long way, and it's so nice to read an update from you - thank you!
Hey guys!! @scared01 @WheresMySquishy @Janine-RO @Bre-RO long time no talk.
I have some exciting news to tell y’all 🥰🥰 also thanks for all your support for when I went thru that difficult time in my life 🥺 I really appreciated a lot ❤️
Hey @scared01 @WheresMySquishy so my exciting news is that, I’ve met the most amazing beautiful girl in the world, I’ve been dating her for the last 7 months and I’m in love, like very much in love, she makes me so happy and just aaaaaaaaaaaaah🥰❤️🥺
Hey @Cheeseburger
It's so nice to hear that things have improved for you and that you're in a loving, fulfilling relationship. Being in love is such a nice feeling. Thanks so much for updating us
Hi @Cheeseburger! It's great to hear from you again! I'm so stoked for you.
No need to thank me, I've loved chatting with you and getting to know you. 🙂
I'd love to hear the exciting news you want to share. 🙂
@Janine-RO Yes yes, I’ve came a long way from the scared guy I was about 2 years ago 🥴👉👈👀🥺 ive gotten so much more confident about my life, and for now I’m not really worried about getting into a relationship (I’m talking to someone) but other then that I have supportive friends and family and I can’t ask for anything more 👉👈👀🥺 life is finally looking better for me 🥰
This truly is so wonderful to hear! It's really great to hear this update.
You may have also seen this thread, but just wanted to point you towards it if you haven't - this is a thread for people in the community chat all things to do with the trans community
It's great to hear that life is going so well for you, it's amazing how much life can change in 2 years isn't it.
Happy new year to you too @Cheeseburger! 🙂 It sounds like it's going to be a very busy year for you.
I'm so glad that you're feeling better! It's also great that you have so many supportive people around you.
How do you feel about starting your transition? I hope it goes well for you.
@Bre-RO @WheresMySquishy thank you.
It's making me, nervous as idk what to expect, but I'm extremely excited 🥰🥺
