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how do i deal with my sadness

 Hi, im really new to this. latley i have been feeling so down i don't know what to do about it. i just dont want to move, get out of bed, anything that envolves speaking to people. i have been haing these thoughts that i just want to be off this planet, i dont want to live anymore. It makes me sadder that i don't know why i'm sad. do you need a reason to be sad. i just want someone to tell me whats wrong with me, what is happening to me 

Re: how do i deal with my sadness

Hey @nala23, welcome to ReachOut! Thanks heaps for jumping on and sharing this story, it can be a little hard talking about this stuff huh? However you've come to the right place, the crew on ReachOut are amazing when it comes to peer support and a few will have also experienced similar feelings to yourself.

I have gone through a similar experience previously, unfortunately we can't tell you exactly what the problem is, but we can share one another's experiences which may help.

In my case, I went through a similar experience in the past. I ended up going to the GP, and from there had some amazing referrals and figured out what was wrong - for me it was mental illness, but for some it's chronic fatigue, diet or sometimes even a flu.


Have you thought about talking to a GP, teacher or counsellor about how you're feeling right now?


I am concerned when you say you don't want to live anymore, we want you to be safe! Do you plan on self harming?


Look forward to hearing from you.

Re: how do i deal with my sadness

i don't think i self harm. This year earlier in the year i would stractch at my arm or hand but i never pysically hurt my self. i have spoken to a couple of people about it. I am going to speak to someone about it next week but i have camp tomrrow and im so confused what to do. i would really apprecite if people would tell me what to do about it.  I feel like a bad person because i don't want to live anymore, im trying to think of my parents and how it would affect them but i feel like i'm a burdan to them 

Re: how do i deal with my sadness

Hey @nala23, welcome Smiley Happy - Glad you could join us!


A lot of people that come here seem to have a similar experience to yourself. @Bree-RO has some excellent points in that there could be any number of things wrong, but it's likely that only a GP will be able to work it out for sure. 


I had made similar posts under an alternate account last year when things were getting pretty bad for me. I saw no way out, as my circumstances were seeming more dire by the day. There were a few days in particular that will stick in my memory for years to come where I was seriously weighing the value of my life against others. I actually had to take this year off from University. It felt horrible. But one of the things I did this year, after allowing myself many months to think things through rationally, was seeking professional help. Specifically, I saw a GP and awkwardly tried to explain what I thought was wrong with me. In my case, this was anxiety and depression. That same day I was trialling a medication that was supposed to make my moods and energy levels more even throughout the day, and I haven't looked back. I put up with horror for years when it was to be so easily remedied. 


Now things might not be so simple for you, or they might be. Either way, I encourage you to get a professional opinion. Whatever the problem may turn out to be I'm sure there is a solution. You just need to muster whatever persistence you have left for this task. And please do update us if you make progress. Even something as trivial as making an appointment is an important step Smiley Wink

Re: how do i deal with my sadness

Hey @nala23, just had to do a quick edit of your post. Have a quick look over the forum guidelines [click here]; just to avoid bringing up some hard stuff for other users on the forum Smiley Happy 


That sounds like a really hard time, how do you feel about the camping trip? Do you think it will be a good distraction or are you concerned it's coming at a bad time..or am I super off the mark? It can be easy to feel like a burden to the people we love when we're in this dark place, and I believe that our minds can play tricks on us. 


There are lots of things that you can do to help yourself, and you have already taken the first step by jumping on ReachOut - well done! Speaking to someone next week also sounds like a really positive move for you right now.

Have you thought about phoning Kids Helpline (1800 551 800) or Lifeline (13 11 14) to speak to a qualified counsellor? They can be a good short term resource. Some things I do when I feel down are meditating, walking the dogs, or using some mindfulness apps such as Smiling Mind, Nature Space or Headspace.


Is there anything you can think of that might make you feel a bit better?


Re: how do i deal with my sadness

hi sorry i didn't know about the guidelines. i think the camp might be a good distraction but i also think it is coming at the worse time possible for me. i have thought of the kids helpline but i dont like speaking to people and especially when i'm in such a dark place at the moment. the worse thing is i cant take my phone on the school camp so if i need to message my mum i can't. i just wish people around me could see whats going on, it makes it so diffifcult when im hanging out with my friends because i can't tell them the truth because i don't want them to think less of me. thank you for your help

Re: how do i deal with my sadness

thank you for the advice Smiley Happy

Re: how do i deal with my sadness

Hi there @nala23, it seems you are going through a really tough time at the moment.
Could you possibly speak with a school counsellor or a trusted teacher or adult whilst you are on camp if you feel the need to?
(I guess you are on camp now), so how is it going and I hope you have been able to manage your feelings?

Re: how do i deal with my sadness

Hey @nala23 I hope you're going okay, if you are on camp. 


I'm in a similar position to you now/recently. I felt unbearably sad, like there was a physical weight inside me. I find when this happens, I just let it. I tell myself, this will pass. I put all my pillows on my bed and I've been marathoning catfish and stargate: atlantis. I find allowing yourself some time to have a bit of a sulk, some down and alone time, without beating yourself up about it, really really helps. You're allowed to be sad. You're allowed to be depressed. It's not going to last forever. 


On top of this, however, I also let my family know/told them what was going on. I told my friends what was happening. Less so that they could help me, but so they could understand why I was being forgetful and flaky and an emotional brick wall. I went back on medication (I have been considering it for a while now though) and made appointments with my psychologist and psychiatrist. 


I hope this helps. Even if you don't do what I do, remember you're not alone in this  Heart


Re: how do i deal with my sadness

Hey @nala23, hope your camp went well (not sure how long it was).
How are you going today?