Let's Chat: Body Image
Body Image is the lens we view ourselves through. How we perceive ourselves when we look in the mirror or catch a glimpse of ourselves. Research has shown that all kinds of people struggle with having a healthy body image. The studies looked closely at the following groups:
- Males
- LGBTQIA+ people
- Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people
- People from culturally diverse groups
We are all unique, so how we deal with body image will also be unique. So, with that said, it would be awesome to make this thread a place where we can chat about how we feel about our bodies.
Through our shared experience, we can see that all people can struggle with their reflection but having that experience is not a life sentence. Your body image can and most likely will change over time, and there are things you can do to impact how you see yourself. Read our guide to body image here that goes into more detail.
I'm going to share my personal story of body image, and it would be awesome to read through other people's stories too. So if you want to share, please do in this thread.
"My first memories of body image start as a little girl. I remember I would obsessively compare myself to other girls. As a young girl, I focused on what made me stand out, and those features made me feel like I wanted to hide away. I so badly wanted to live up to western beauty standards. As a teen, I'd straighten my hair and lighten my skin with foundation - trying to make myself fit into something I wasn't. Unfortunately, these beliefs were reaffirmed through media, advertisements and sometimes bullying.
It took me YEARS to realise that all the things I hated about my appearance were connected to my identity as a person of colour. Of course, it wasn't overnight, but I started to see myself completely different in time. The weirdest thing was looking back on old photos and realising that the way I saw myself in the mirror was totally different to what I looked like in reality.
What I think can be taken from my story is that the way you see yourself right now is not how you'll always see yourself. So, although having a positive body image is still something I'm striving for, I feel that I am further along in my journey. But, most importantly, I believe that I will continue to see myself in a better light - because I feel better about myself the more I grow and learn to accept myself."
If chatting about body image has got you down, click here to get some support from The Butterfly Foundation.
It sounds like your friends at school are not always as supportive as they should be. I am sorry that you have to experience this. Is there a friend that you feel closest with that you would feel comfortable talking to about how you have been feeling?
It's good to read that talking to people here has been helpful @HelloHi
The community is always here to chat through the kinds of things you've been going through! You're not alone 🙂
Heya I just wanted to jump on this discussion as it a super important topic. Thanks to everyone who has opened up top work! It has been really good to hear all of stories, it helps us all feel normal in our struggles and not alone!!! For me I struggled with my body since a little kid as I didn't feel connected to being a female, I was a tomboy. I was bullied all the time for how I dressed and acted plus I had red hair and lots of freckles, I wasn't seen as "normal" and because of this it led to a lot of self hate. I had a lot going on with my family and felt a bit out control, to try and regain control I became obsessed with exercise and I became an unhealthy weight. When I looked in the mirror I would focus on every detail that I didn't see as perfect. it was a hard battle with self hatred, but once I started to understand that I didn't want to be "normal" I wanted to be me and that meant understand and accepting my sexuality and that I am non-binary, I became much more healthier! I feel like my journey has been like looking into a dirty mirror, slowly but surely the mirror started to become clean and I saw the real me and I bloody love it!
thank you for sharing that 🙂 I’m so happy that you have accepted/found who you are!
@JullyBean thanks so much for sharing your journey with body image - you write really beautifully. It makes me so sad to read about year 6 you not eating lunch and having after school workout sessions 😞
I love what you say about having patience, kindness and respect for yourself, that's such a brilliant foundation for working towards body acceptance, and I know how hard that can be, and I love the concept of learning to tune in more to your body and listen to what it's craving in terms of exercise and food!
Have you ever come across the documentary Embrace before? The trailer is here, it's all about body acceptance. It's so refreshing to me to hear someone challenging the messages we're fed about this stuff.
I think this is such an important topic @Bre-RO. Thank you for sharing your story.
I can kind of relate to some of what you said. I was born with a lot of excessive hair that my other family members didn't have. No one in my school had as much hair as me, not even the boys. I didn't look like a lot of the fair-skinned and fair-haired Anglo-Australian people, although my skin is fairly light too, and I wanted to look more like them. I spent a lot of time trying various hair removal methods when I was younger because I was teased a lot about it and I used to obsess over it even if I had one strand of hair showing. I even got burns and scars from some of these methods. I ended up going on a medication to help with some other symptoms I had, but it helped reduce the hair growth as well. Nowadays, I've learned to focus on more important things to do with my time. Even though I still have a lot of hair now, I've learned to just accept it.
Another thing I've learned is that everyone's metabolism is different and one way of trying to be healthier may not work for someone else. I don't think there is a one size fits all approach. I've had lots of family members struggle with their weight and they would try methods that resulted in rapid weight loss for them, but when I did some of the things that they were doing, I ended up rapidly gaining weight. I'm waiting on the results of some tests to find out if there is a medical reason for this.
Hi @Bre-RO,
I want to know how to be healthier.
I am ugly and fat.
I hate myself.
Talking to your doctor about healthy lifestyle choices might be the best way forward because it's so easy to go down the road of disordered eating when we have low self esteem 😞 And that isn't a healthy way to go
I really don't like myself.
My parents wouldn't let me see a doctor and I am not ready to go to the doctor, sorry.
I don't think things will ever change.
But thank you for your kindness
That's okay. Do you think there's even a *slight possibility* that things might change? And how would you want things to change?
I think it's really common not to like yourself 😞 It's sad but yeah.. I've got that too
We like you though! 🙂
Thanks for your kind words.
I want to change, but I don't think that is ever going to happen.
I am really sorry you feel the same too.
Hello @HelloHi , I am sorry to hear that you hate yourself. I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you to feel that way. I just wanted to quickly remind you about sticking to our community guidelines, particularly those that focus on talking about eating disorders and weight loss methods. With these in mind, I have had to edit your post a bit. We strongly encourage a positive attitude towards bodies here, so I would encourage you to read this article about body positivity if you would like to learn more about what this means.
As Bre covered, if you would like to discuss this in a bit more detail with someone, or would like a bit more support, I recommend having a look at the Butterfly website. You can call their hotline or chat online to receive support from a qualified mental health professional with specialist training in eating disorders and body image. I hope that you find this to be helpful
Sorry for not sticking to your community guidelines.
I have used the Butterfly Foundation before, but I didn't find it helpful. They asked me to use KHL and that they were mainly for eating disorders and gave me information sheets. It felt like a rush too. I didn't feel like they understood me.
