But it has to be purrrrfect!

Thank you everyone!! goodnight

I think my top tip would be to do the best you can given the situation (don't be too hard on yourself) and keep doing what you love 🙂

- yellow cupcakes

In all seriousness, one of the strategies that I've found to be consistently helpful is to turn the activity I'm procrastinating on into some sort of team-effort, (ideally by partnering up with someone who isn't also a procrastinator). I know I suck at holding myself accountable to personal deadlines, but I hate letting people down, so if I've set up an agreement with someone to peer-review each other's work/give each other feedback by a given date it's a lot easier to meet that "fake" deadline, than if it was just for my own sake. It's not always applicable (e.g. non-group assignments obviously can't be written together), but it's worked pretty well for me when I have managed to pull it off.

EDIT: Thanks for all the comments, guys! The eyes in the "finished" version still bug the hell out of me though, so I'm trying not to look at it too hard or else I'll have to go back and try and fix it again, haha...

Aaand that just about wraps it up for tonight's GR on perfectionism!! Huge thank you's to everyone who joined in tonight - I definitely learned a lot and it was so good to share in our experiences of perfectionism and especially share heaps of useful strategies.

To finish off, post your top tip for someone who is having a tough time with perfectionism below so that others who see this discussion after tonight can have a read of your suggestions!

@May_, not yet because i'm like 'it's not a real deadline...' but i can't think of how else to get the time pressure but not be late

so i'm thinking next year i'll try it (and just realised that's kinda procrastinating again haha). just gotta try to get better at tricking myself 😛

@loves netballthat's so great to hear that running is a super helpful strategy for you!

@Aschewow that looks great! RO peeps are a talented bunch!

6. What strategies do you use to cope with the not so great side of perfectionism?

@Asche, yeah I also need some sort of urgent deadline coming up so that i can accept something as 'good enough' and get stuff done instead of trying to nitpick and stuff. But then waiting til the last minute is the negative procrastination side of perfectionism for me.. I like the idea of putting a 'fake deadline' before the real deadline. So there's the pressure to get it done but it's not so last minute that things get handed in late. Not sure if I can really 'trick' myself into it but i think i'll try that again next year

But yeah, I try to just do my best if it's something important to me, and if I'm getting stressed from spending way too much time on something that isn't really going to make that much of a difference in the end, then i'll leave it

Focusing on the journey is good too, like in drawing. Sometimes when I'm just experimenting and don't have an end goal in mind (like the exact picture i want to draw), it's fun to see where things lead... like new ideas pop into my head and I just go with it and see how it all ends up! I think this is when the journey is fun for me

Maybe just having a go at things and gaining new experiences, even if things don't turn out as planned 🙂

@Stealth_ninjalove your 'just start' strategy. Sometimes taking that first step can be scary and hard, but just making a start shows heaps of strength!

@loves netballexactly, it's important to find strategies that work the best for you. And I absolutely agree! It doesn't matter if baked goods don't look exactly like the recipe's photo - it's all about the taste

What strategies do you use to cope with the not so great side of perfectionism?

@cupcakes_032that's a really cool perspective about being real, not perfect! Definitely going to incorporate that into my positive self talk.

Something that has helped me lately (which we've talked about throughout the session tonight) is to remember to enjoy the process, rather than focusing on one solution.

I think it's important to keep in mind that feeling stressed out about having to be perfect is a common thing, and when we feel stressed or unmotivated it can be difficult to find/keep in mind these strategies. The most important thing is that to keep trying regardless, because that's how we improve and positive changes are made.

@Aschehaha sounds like the unshaded drawings were an unexpected benefit of finding the journey to be better than a finished/"perfect" product!

thanks so much @loves netball! haha i wasn't expecting to get great baking tips here 😉

hi @May_ 🙂

Wow these are all really great answers! (no pressure hehe)

From reading's everyone's responses, I think I'm realising that perfectionism can turn into a problem when it stops us from doing what we love, like singing or art. When it gets past motivating and becomes demotivating

@khaleesi_18, when you were talking about your friends writing songs and being reluctant to share them, it reminded me of something i read somewhere about being real, not perfect (cos we're human)

How does perfectionism effect creative activities that you might do (e.g. writing, drawing, dance)?

I'd say that frustration when art doesn't quite turn out right is pretty common @j95. Comparing our levels of talent to others (whose works we perceive as perfect) can be tricky to deal with, and result in lower self esteem, too. I've had friends who have produced amazing visual art pieces or written incredible songs but are reluctant to share them with others, because they aren't 100% happy.

On the flip side though, I sing, and when I listen to a singer that has a stronger/more impressive vocal range than me, it motivates me to work harder. I also used to sing heaps and have lessons, but I'm so out of practice and feel nervous to get back into it properly. Same with exercise too actually... again, I think this relates back to @Ben-RO's point about enjoying the journey of improvement, rather than only being satisfied at the end result.