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Turning Negatives Into Positives

At the suggestion of Lightuptheworld, I thought I'd start another 'Turning Negatives into Positives' thread like there is on the old forum. Below is a quote from Antria who started the thread on the previous forum which I think explains the idea of the thread quite well.

 

"Sometimes it can be helpful to turn our thinking around and begin to challenge the way we look at things. Turning negatives into positives is a way of doing this! Basically, think of something that happened today, this week, this month or at some other time that felt negative and see if you can find a positive in it (or that came out of it)."

 

I find posting in this thread really helps me to look at things in a different way or see positives that I might not have noticed if I'm in a negative headspace. I'll start the ball rolling:

 

Negative: My friend didn't turn up to class this morning and I was worried I would be alone because I don't really know anyone else in the class.

Positive: It gave me a chance to sit with new people and get to know them better 🙂

 

Over to you!

delicatedreamer
delicatedreamerPosted 08-08-2012 03:02 PM

Comments (192 pages)

 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 12-07-2015 10:56 PM
@hartley_ I'm still feeling terrible Lifeline proved unhelpful 😞 I would try Eheadspace but they locked my account. I kinda just want to give up. It's so hard...

I guess so... That'd be good to have a theme to extend myself on.. I'll try to upload a couple one day... I need to go through them first.. 200 photos is too many to look through and select the good ones in one sitting!
 
 
 
 
 
moonwalk
moonwalkPosted 12-07-2015 10:31 PM

Hey @Bee, sorry to hear you're having a tough night.

 

It was really cool to read about you getting back into photography. What kind of things do you enjoy shooting the most? Going back to a hobby like photography where you can express your creative side so much and clear you mind and just focus on your surroundings is a really positive thing.

 

By clicking that emergency yellow link is a positive itself. You've recognised that you're having an extra rough night and need some help, which is a very important thing.

 

Can I just make sure you're safe right now Bee?

 
 
 
 
 
Chessca_H
Chessca_HPosted 12-07-2015 10:24 PM

Hey @Bee sounds like you're feeling really down right now 😞 I know that dealing with self-doubt and self-loathing can be so difficult, but a postive in it is it's something that can be changed. Part of your recovery process is earning to be kind to yourself and that's going to take a while. It's also a big postive that you're seeking help about it, so just keep on reaching out and trying your best 🙂

 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 12-07-2015 10:52 PM
@Chessca_H I guess so, it just seems to linger though, and it's making it hard for me to see a way out..

@moonwalk I've done a fair few nature shots a few years ago, and have just started with that. I recently bought a new camera so it's learning how to use the DLSR and the features...
I guess so. It doesn't feel like it tho. I connected with lifeline's online chat, but it hasn't felt very helpful 😞
I'm safe now. But I'm feeling so fragile, so I'm unsure how I'm going to go tonight :'(
I'm just hurting so bad, and I don't understand why anymore...
 
 
 
 
 
Chessca_H
Chessca_HPosted 12-07-2015 10:58 PM

@Bee I definitely understand that feeling, but you've seriously come so far already. It can be hard to see when you're in the middle of it but from the outside looking in you've absolutely made heaps of progress. Are there some self-care techniques that you could be using right now that usually help to lift you out of a bad mental space?

 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 12-07-2015 11:02 PM
@Chessca_H I don't even know. I'm having trouble focusing on anything! I don't even have the motivation to take myself to bed! Because hat requires moving two baskets of washing, a few bags and a cat... I haven't even had a shower tonight 😞 No energy
 
 
 
 
 
Chessca_H
Chessca_HPosted 12-07-2015 11:09 PM

@Bee is there anyone at home who you could let know about how you're doing mentally and get some help sorting things out from? Getting yourself to bed and getting a good night's sleep would be a really good thing for you right now 

 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 12-07-2015 11:12 PM
@Chessca_H I don't trust anyone at home. I wouldn't even think about letting them know. I don't feel comfortable talking about that with them. I'd rather suffer in silence.. I know. I'm trying to get myself to at least try to get to bed. I need to lie down, I'm starting to feel dizzy 😞
 
 
 
 
 
Chessca_H
Chessca_HPosted 12-07-2015 11:21 PM

@Bee You don't have to let them know everything about what you're feeling, but suffering in silence will only make things worse. Just asking them to help you move stuff to help you get to bed would be better than nothing

 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 14-07-2015 08:19 PM

@Chessca_H I know that, it just feels too hard to open up to my parents, especially my mum, I think part of it is that I'm so aware how much she herself has struggled with mental health issues, that it's hard to talk to her about it because it feels like I'll be a burden... I know that that kinda thinking is very persuaded and incorrect, but it's so engrained within me... It'll be something I need to work on with my psychologist I think

 

@hartley_ Not anymore. I stopped using KHL after the counsellor continued to pressure me to ring when I just wasn't able to
I eventually just pushed the baskets onto the floor, by time I got to do that the cat was gone...
I still haven't folded the washing, it's just getting moved from my bed to the floor... My room looks like a bomb hit it... I have no energy to clean it....

 

Neg: My psychiatrist changed me meds so I'm in the wash off phase now and I hate it. I feel so terrible coming off them. Not justbecause it didn't work as hoped but also the usual side effects from coming off it have been so intense to say the least! 😞 I was super agitated and angry this morning and for no reason at all. I had a swearing session at my car. I didn't even know what tipped me over the edge? I feel like I've lost control over myself!

Pos: The change in meds should help me improve long term if they work like they are meant to. I've done my best to keep myself safe from harm while coming off the original meds. I've done so well to not have self-harmed! Despite the swearing session, I was able to put on a calm face when I walked into work. I hid beneath my original facade and got on with my day. Within an hour of being at work I settled into my work self and I noticed I had a positive attitude towards it all. For once I was actually happy to stand in express for a little while. I think because I had put myself in an awward situation with my supervisor at the start of my shift, she knew I hadn't had the best morning, I asked for another job and I think that time alone gave me time to focus and gave me a sense of accomplishment as I was able to really see how much I had done during the day in terms of putting stock out. It seems to work for me, jumping between registers and putting stock out. (Is this worth mentioning to my weekday supervisor? That it helps keep me focused?)

 

 

Ps. A HUGE thank you to everyone who replied to me over the weekend and helped me. I was a very terrible place and I really didn't have any foresight, I couldn't see out of the haze I was stuck in. In the end sleep helped (although I woke exhausted) bu having to go to work helped re-centre myself I think.

 
 
 
 
 
ElleBelle
ElleBellePosted 14-07-2015 09:47 PM

Lots of positives there @Bee! One of the things I love most about Reach Out is knowing there are people who will care and listen when you're going through a rough patch. Did you talk through some of the possible side effects of changing meds with your psych? Defs send them an email if it's getting a bit full on.

 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 14-07-2015 09:59 PM
@ElleBelle WOW yes there is! Haha. I didn't even realize, I just kept typing lol
No I didn't get to, I think she may have been with another client though... But she did say it'll be really tough coming off the medication, and wished me luck with it all. I do have an apt with a GP tomorrow with my shoulder, so hopefully I get a chance to talk to him a bit. (I'm seeing a different person because my usual GP is booked out. But I've seen him before at this clinic) But otherwise I will shoot her an email, I do have an apt with my psychologist next Tuesday and then my psychiatrist at the end of the month
 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 15-07-2015 01:21 PM

Neg: Got my blood test results back, and feeling a little bit self-conscious. A little bit down. Feeling kinda low. Feeling unsure mostly

Pos: Good news is that these can be treated! I'm starting treatment for one condition today and the other I am not sure how to help it will have to speak to my regulr GP...

 

Neg: Things at home are feeling at breaking point. I've been so tired and cranky and my moods have been so unstable. Yet no one has actually brought it up... Kinda makes me wonder why I bother staying at home. The other part is dad has been so very verbal recently and it's taking a toll on me emotionally. Between that and my brother and his ways, I'm letting myself fall into negative patterns with my mental health. Part of the reason I want to move out, is because I think I would have a better chance at getting better but I can't afford it right now...

Pos: I'm doing my best to cope right now. I'm starting treatment to help me not be so tired. I'm working everyday this week, so I'm hoping the time out will allow me to settle a bit. I'm learning to ignore some of the comments from those around me. I'm seeing a psychologist to help with the negative patterns and thinking, I will need to bring this up with her as it's a big part of where these thoughts and thinking styles come from/begin/get worse....

 
 
 
 
 
moonwalk
moonwalkPosted 15-07-2015 09:48 PM

Hey @Bee, I'm really, really impressed with how you've been able to see and work towards positives. Even after receiving your blood test results, you look at the bright side - the conditions are treatable and you'r already starting treatment on one of them. Your attitude and strength is really inspiring stuff!

 

I'm really proud of you for focusing on ignoring negative comments from others. Sometimes people don't really understand the weight of what they say and how it can affect someone. Please keep us updated on how the negative patterns and thinking sessions with your psychologist go. There's so much proof in this thread of the amazing progress you've already made in this area, these sessions could help you take even bigger strides!

 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 17-07-2015 11:29 PM

@sunflowers5 thanks. It's tough, but I'm surviving I guess.
@moonwalk My psychologist helped with that. I was kinda like great more issues... I will, I'll try to bring it up next session.

 

Neg: Have worked everyday for 8 days straight and 2 more to go before 2 days off, one for TAFE and then my psych apt. I'm just feeling really tired right now with all the work I've had. I'm cranky. I'm fragile. I'm clumsy. I'm not coping when I make mistakes or bump into things. I'm feeling foggy and not in tune with myself. I'm feeling detached and distant from life. Feeling over the whole process of everything. Why do I even bother? Life just feels too hard right now. I just want to give up 😞

Pos: At least I've got work! Some of them have been short shifts which has been awesome. I will get through. One day at a time. I know the extreme tiredness/exhaustion right now is a combination of being over-worked and lack of sleep mixed with iron deficiency! It's treatable and I'm in the treatment phase, I just wish it would hurry up and kick in. Feeling like I'm not coping is a fair bit bcause I'm tired! The other negative thoughts are the black dog digging its heals in again. It's trying to take control of me and my life...

 

Neg: I'm starting to be given the really really long shifts at work again... I feel like I'm in a catch 22, if I complain about them and say I find them too hard, my shifts will get cut back to 4 hours each again, and I'll end up with 3 shifts a week, but if I don't say anything and I just keep doing them, I'm only making myself more tired, and putting myself at risk of more negative thoughts. I'm only going to be making myself worse in the long run, I'm struggling now to get things done, after a 3.5 hour shift how am I going to cope with the long as ones? 

Pos: I NEED to bring this up with either my GP or my psychologist. I need to seek their opinion and possibly get them involved. I want to continue working their, I get along ok with most of the staff, I'm managing to feel ok there. But sometimes the work environment and the hours make it really hard to cope during work and afterwards. I know deep down some of it is my skwewd thinking, but I need help before it escalates too bad..

 
 
 
 
 
hartley_
hartley_Posted 19-07-2015 09:04 PM

Hey @Bee how are you going?

Did you manage to get some rest over the weekend?

 

Its great that you have identified things that might put you at risk of negative thoughts, and I like how you are trying to be reasonable and compromise with the catch over long/short shifts. I totally understand that, when you are casual or part time it seems you get lots of long shifts when you dont want and fewer short ones when you want work haha!

Its a good idea to chat to your psych and gp about it, maybe they can help you with some coping tips and if these dont seem to be working you could explain to your work that youd like alternating long and short shifts or one long shift a week (or whatever you feel comfortable with)

 

Hows home life going atm? and swapping meds, have the bad side effects eased at all?

 
 
 
 
 
Troy
TroyPosted 16-07-2015 04:15 PM

NEG:My office manager quit the job, and she usually handles SO MANY THINGS that we cant do or never learn to do.

Positive: This is an opportunity for me to increase my responsibility within the practice, to learn new skills, experience and to grow as a person!

 
 
 
 
 
SailorE
SailorEPosted 17-07-2015 05:37 PM
negative: I'm going to graduate a lot later than I wanted too, and people are going to know
Postive: I can't do anything about the past, and I don't know what is going to happen in the future and at least now I have a plan and I inow what I'm going to do. Its the best possible plan given the circumstances, and I was able to do using all the available resources to me. Before, I would have never needed any help, so I would have never learnt to use resources, maybe I'll do even better than I would have before hand


Negative: my mother has been back for two days, and already she has made several comments where she greatly underestimates the severity of my depression and greatly overestimates what I am able to do and cope.
Positive: she thinks that I am stronger than I am, so maybe she is seeing something I am not. Perhaps I'm faking it, so soon I'll make it? The comments were not made maliciously, rather stem from a mistaken belief, there will be other people like that in the world, and I have to learn to deal with it sooner or later. A year ago the comments would have sent me into a spiral, and I might not have even known why but not today, which shows I accept myself more, and I know what my values are. Who knows where I will be a year from now!
 
 
 
 
 
Kit
KitPosted 17-07-2015 10:30 PM

Great positives @SailorE! Huge props for the reflection and for shifting your perspective. That is really inspiring to see.

 
 
 
 
 
sunflowers5
sunflowers5Posted 15-07-2015 06:03 PM
@Bee , awesome to see that you know you can overcome all the negatives! Great attitude, I feel so inspired... ahah. 🙂
Hope time outside the house does let you settle and all the other coping mechanisms have a positive outcome, all the best.
 
 
 
 
 
Bee
BeePosted 12-07-2015 11:23 PM
@Chessca_H in this house help is illegal. I can't even get someone to help me serve tea let alone do anything that only benefits me!
 
 
 
 
 
hartley_
hartley_Posted 12-07-2015 11:30 PM

do you ever use KHL @Bee?

 

A good sleep would be good for you, you dont even have to move the cat - just make it snuggle on your bed for the night 🙂

can you put the baskets on the floor next to your bed and just jump in? worry about them later?

 
 
 
 
 
Creativegirl12
Creativegirl12Posted 13-07-2015 12:11 PM
Negative: my head hurts from lack of sleep

Positive: at least I'm still feeling energetic and my headache isn't bad enough for me to not be functional. I've had more intense migraines. I guess I'll work on trying on getting enough sleep tonight.

Negative: I having urges to go on a shopping spree even though i know i shouldn't waste money. But its so annoying.

Positive: I'm with my parents, so its easier to control myself. I guess that's good then.

Negative: I'm feeling hyper and edgy

Positive: But I also feel awesome and euphoric and creative.
 
 
 
 
 
Sophie-RO
Sophie-ROPosted 13-07-2015 05:46 PM

Hey @Creativegirl12 - I know we don't have a lot of people with bipolar here - and I know how valuable it can be to talk to others with a similar diagnosis but have you ever check out other SANE forums? If you wanted to connect with people of all ages who are living with bipolar, they have lots of stories, experiences and knowledge to share and I'm sure they'd love to hear how you cope too....
http://saneforums.org/t5/Lived-Experience-Forum/ct-p/lived-experience-forum

 
 
 
 
 
Chessca_H
Chessca_HPosted 13-07-2015 08:51 PM

Negative: feel like I'm getting a cold 😧

Positive: the homemade chicken noodle soup I had for lunch today made me feel heaps better!

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